If your Facebook status could be ANYTHING, what would it be?

VICEDRN, BSN, RN · Jan 24, 2012

If you could vent to Facebook ANYTHING without risk of work/coworkers/patients seeing, what would it be?

This morning it would have been:

Dear selfish self centered conservative friends, neighbors, relatives:

I am sick of watching people die because you spend all of your time worrying about what other people have and don't have that you do or don't have. I am sick of taking care of people who would otherwise lead full healthy lives except you decided they didn't deserve access to the system because they weren't born here even though they speak no spanish, etc and have been here almost all their lives.

PLEASE come to work with me so you can tell them, "NO! No one here will help you." and answer questions like, "Am I going to die?" with the "Yes." you so clearly long to give them.

A great nation can look past selfishness and build a great system based on equality and a sense of community with one another. I fear we are not the great nation we think we are.

sserrn, BSN · Jan 26, 2012

If you could vent to Facebook ANYTHING without risk of work/coworkers/patients seeing, what would it be?

How about....if you're gna make a suicide attempt, be serious about it. I don't want you in one of my rooms, and I promise your next 24 to 72 hrs are going to be really miserable, esp if you tried to overdose. Just sayin'.

Altra, BSN, RN · Jan 26, 2012

"I love it when you can tell me with a straight face that you have allergies to aspirin, Tylenol, ibuprofen, naproxen, and oh yeah, Excedrin." :rolleyes:

EDRN10 · Jan 28, 2012

Altra don't forget toradol. Everyone here is allergic to that but nearly all can miraculously take ibuprofen if they are at home and have a headache.

Editorial Team / Moderator · Jan 28, 2012

It would be "Hooray, I have two weeks off!" Ya know, if we were putting a wish list out there.

SweettartRN · Jan 29, 2012

Don't tell me that you have a level 10/10 pain when you are chatting on your cell phone and eating Fritos and drinking a large Super Gulp.

*rolling my eyes*

DayDreamin ER CRNP · Feb 2, 2012

To the drunk, rude and foul-mouthed patient in my room...don't tell me, "I can talk to you however I ******* want to. I'm paying your **** salary, ******!" and then 2 seconds later tell the registration rep that you don't have insurance.

No bueno.

ErinBSN · Feb 2, 2012

Okay, the SCALE is 1-10. Don't tell me 20, 50, 100. Also vomiTing does NOT have a K in it. there is no such word as VOMIKING! and if you use the word excruciating to describe your pain you better be writhing on the floor. If your drunk. Don't get beligerant. Just dont I don 't appreciate it and I dont' want to wrestle you down with a b52. Thank you. (I just came off 12 hours of drunk wrestling, so forgive my typos!)

NO50FRANNY · Feb 3, 2012

1) No, your drink wasn't spiked (before, or after the 40 vodkas you drank), no we will not test you for it and no we don't care. You already know why you embarrassed yourself, don't try and get us to validate it.

2) The quickest way to get no attention from me at all is to be mean, I will ignore you until you leave or have you removed.

3) If you pretend to faint/swoon/collapse at triage because Ive just told you to have a seat, I will know, I will let you fall on the floor and everyone including me will know that you thought you were more important than everyone else and you will still be sitting in the chair in the waiting room.

4) If attention and some love is what you need come talk to me, don't brake your fragile body by overdosing it just makes everything worse.

5) I will do ANYTHING for you, if you are sick.

6) If you have the ability to yell at me about how long you've had to wait, you have answered the big 3 questions that determine your wait time, A, B, C- now you can wait even longer.

7) If a tertiary hospital is looking for a veterinary CT scanner that fits horses for you because you are that big, it is time to look into help with your diet.

8) The ambulance does not impress me, nor does it mean you will see a doctor quicker you just used a $2000 taxi- if you don't care, neither will I.

9) I back up my colleagues, they back me up too, don't bag them out in front of me, I wouldn't do it where you work.

10) You can buy pregnancy tests at the chemist for about $10, this is not an emergency.

11) It is not reasonable at 20 years of age, to come to the hospital with vomiting after a big night on the sauce.

12) It is not reasonable at 20 years of age, to come to the hospital for uncomplicated period pain.

13) We don't have dentists who will fix your tooth for free, but I will give you a list of them in the metro area- I can't fix the hole in your tooth that you have had for two weeks nor can anyone I work with, dentist or pharmacist for pain killers thats all Im going to tell you (if you came in an ambulance with your toothache I will send you to the taxi rank out the front).

14) If you tell me that you are allergic to every painkiller except for IV narcotics I will automatically assume that every word that comes out of your mouth is a lie, so, try telling me the truth and then maybe I can actually help you.

15)If you ask me for preferential treatment (such as, being seen quicker) because you work at the same facility, you are asking me to be unethical, I will tell you this, and also it's pretty insulting.

17)I hate the fact that you have to wait more than you do, it's not our fault, we wish it was different and we are doing our best, the trouble is, an emergency for you is not an emergency for us. The mangled and half dead people will always be seen before you, that's why we can't tell you how long it will be.

18)I will always be confused if you tell me how bad we all were the last time you came in, all I can think is "why did you come back?"

19)If you can't handle your party drugs, don't take them.

20)I work with some of the smartest people in the world, you can trust us.

I've decided that the fundamental reason that ED nurses get so annoyed with all these things is the sick people. The sick people deserve every second of our time and are entitled to it. I feel better now but am thinking there is probably plenty more where that came from!

hiddencatRN, BSN, RN · Feb 7, 2012

"To the majority of my patients who came in today: how do you manage to function in the world? Seriously, how have you not been eaten by a lion or stuck a fork in an outlet? Also, how do you get to places you can't call 911 to be transported to?"

VICEDRN, BSN, RN · Feb 7, 2012

"To the majority of my patients who came in today: how do you manage to function in the world? Seriously, how have you not been eaten by a lion or stuck a fork in an outlet? Also, how do you get to places you can't call 911 to be transported to?"

I know the answer to the last part: You triangulate the nearest ER to your desired destination and then walk away from triage. Happens to us all the time.