I'm not proud of it, but I feel it was justified. This nurse is a known drama queen and can't talk about anything unless it is how much harder she has things than everyone else, how everything is about "me, me ,me." She runs around like a chicken with its head cut off. Most people can't stand her, but she has ONE thing going for her: the DON thinks she hung the moon.
We were working 3-11 last night. They were already short one night shift nurse and the other one called in. Drama Queen took the call in, and started carrying on about how she "could" stay until 3 am when the other nurse was scheduled to come in, but she was not going to take the whole building herself and be responsible for all those patients.
So, I agreed to watch my hall and we could both stay until 3 am.
A little while later Drama Queen came over and told me she was getting everyone bedded down "good" and I shouldn't have any trouble out of them. I said to hold on a minute, wasn't she staying until 3AM???
She just gave me this blank look. So I reminded her that if she was going to refuse to work the whole building by herself why should I be expected to?
She stood there a minute and then said, "Ok, you got me."
Later, she came charging up to the nurses station shaking with anger and said something was going on at her house and she was so mad she couldn't stand it and could I call anyone to come in and help.
Being the pushover I am, I told her to just go home at 11.
She calmed down almost immediately.
Later, I saw her chatting with the CNA's, laughing and going out to smoke. This ran all over me and the more I thought about it the madder I got. When she came over at 10:30pm to give me report and leave I couldn't stand it anymore. I told her she had more drama in her life than a soap opera and i just KNEW she was going to muster up some reason she couldn't stay like she promised she would. Furthermore, she expects everyone else to adhere to strict standards but these standards don't apply to her (she leaves two hours early every night, in spite of saying she has too much on her and carries a heavier workload than anyone else.)
Anyway, she gets real quiet and walks away, then comes back and starts making snarky remarks about how I had no right to talk to her that way. I shot back with some remarks of my own while she kept mouthing off and that is where it ended.
So, I agreed to watch my hall and we could both stay until 3 am.
A little while later Drama Queen came over and told me she was getting everyone bedded down "good" and I shouldn't have any trouble out of them. I said to hold on a minute, wasn't she staying until 3AM???
She just gave me this blank look. So I reminded her that if she was going to refuse to work the whole building by herself why should I be expected to?
She stood there a minute and then said, "Ok, you got me."
Later, she came charging up to the nurses station shaking with anger and said something was going on at her house and she was so mad she couldn't stand it and could I call anyone to come in and help.
Being the pushover I am, I told her to just go home at 11.
She calmed down almost immediately.
Later, I saw her chatting with the CNA's, laughing and going out to smoke. This ran all over me and the more I thought about it the madder I got. When she came over at 10:30pm to give me report and leave I couldn't stand it anymore. I told her she had more drama in her life than a soap opera and i just KNEW she was going to muster up some reason she couldn't stay like she promised she would. Furthermore, she expects everyone else to adhere to strict standards but these standards don't apply to her (she leaves two hours early every night, in spite of saying she has too much on her and carries a heavier workload than anyone else.)
When she started carrying on about some supposed emergency at home, you caved.
You got scammed, and you know it. You took out your frustration at being a "pushover" (your term) on her.
If I choose to allow a person to walk all over me, should I be angry at that individual? Is it that individual's "fault"?
There could be fallout over this, as you chose to publicly take on the "pet" employee of the boss without backup from coworkers.
I have to agree with the above post. In fact, I'm kind of surprised that so many people seem to think that you did the right thing.
I think you created this situation for yourself; you allowed her to manipulate you and it made you angry. She asked you to call someone else in to cover so she could leave early. Even though you state that you know she has a history of leaving early, and that this fact bothers you, you told her to go ahead.
Later, when she was happy to have gotten her way, you came and told her off in front of other people - leveled a personal attack against her, not just a professional one. I think she was entirely justified to come up to you and say you had no right to speak to her that way. In my opinion, you did not have a right to speak to her that way, no matter what she did.
If you had a complaint about her, you should have addressed it through the proper channels instead of throwing a temper tantrum. Or, better yet, you should not have allowed her to leave early unless she could find her own replacement.
I hope this issue gets addressed with both of you, so that both of you learn that neither of you get to behave this way and be considered professional.
That's good you take the high road all the time, because a lot of other people who actually know this situation with this nurse empathize (and sympathize) with me wholeheartedly.
No, I did not apologize to her and I won't. Not because of my pride, but because it was so blatant and obvious what she was doing and I'm still as angry about it today as I was then.
The DON just laughed about it and said if they got rid of everyone who "got into it" with her pet nurse there wouldn't be anyone left.
That's life in this here nursing home.
At least she hasn't asked me to take the keys so she could leave early again, though some other poor schmuck fell for it last week and off she went.
So you're prepared for this to happen again, right? You'll stay late & agree that she gets to go home early, right?
She's found a successful tactic that gets her what she wants, so she has every incentive to do it again.
Um, no. She only speaks to me when absolutely necessary and it's strictly business. This is good, since I'm not at work to win friends and influence people.
Will work on my temper, though. I was born in the year of the tiger, after all.
I had to yell at another nurse, although this wasn't a drama queen, she thought she was a princess. She thought everyone should do everything for her (while she sat on her butt charting). Of course when the tables were turned she wouldn't get up to help you. Couldn't mess up her hair I guess. I just wondered how long she has been able to keep this up, because everyone got tired of her. She transferred to another area since none of us put up with her. She has been a nurse for probably over 20 years, I just wonder how she has lasted in this profession so long acting like a prima donna.:argue:
That's good you take the high road all the time, because a lot of other people who actually know this situation with this nurse empathize (and sympathize) with me wholeheartedly.
It's not about taking the high road. It's not even about not being empathetic to your situation. I think everyone who is a nurse, or works in the health field, has worked with unprofessional colleagues, at some point in time.
It's about professionalism.
While this particular nurse's conduct was unprofessional, so was yours. And it smacks of hypocrisy for you to be all in a huff about someone else's unprofessional conduct when your own is somewhat ... questionable.
This is good, since I'm not at work to win friends and influence people.
With that kind of attitude, I wonder what your co-workers think of you?
It's not about taking the high road. It's not even about not being empathetic to your situation. I think everyone who is a nurse, or works in the health field, has worked with unprofessional colleagues, at some point in time.
It's about professionalism.
While this particular nurse's conduct was unprofessional, so was yours. And it smacks of hypocrisy for you to be all in a huff about someone else's unprofessional conduct when your own is somewhat ... questionable.
Again, please tell us what it is like to be so flawless and exemplory.
With that kind of attitude, I wonder what your co-workers think of you?
Altra, BSN, RN
6,255 Posts
When she started carrying on about some supposed emergency at home, you caved.
You got scammed, and you know it. You took out your frustration at being a "pushover" (your term) on her.
If I choose to allow a person to walk all over me, should I be angry at that individual? Is it that individual's "fault"?
There could be fallout over this, as you chose to publicly take on the "pet" employee of the boss without backup from coworkers.