I'm not proud of it, but I feel it was justified. This nurse is a known drama queen and can't talk about anything unless it is how much harder she has things than everyone else, how everything is about "me, me ,me." She runs around like a chicken with its head cut off. Most people can't stand her, but she has ONE thing going for her: the DON thinks she hung the moon.
We were working 3-11 last night. They were already short one night shift nurse and the other one called in. Drama Queen took the call in, and started carrying on about how she "could" stay until 3 am when the other nurse was scheduled to come in, but she was not going to take the whole building herself and be responsible for all those patients.
So, I agreed to watch my hall and we could both stay until 3 am.
A little while later Drama Queen came over and told me she was getting everyone bedded down "good" and I shouldn't have any trouble out of them. I said to hold on a minute, wasn't she staying until 3AM???
She just gave me this blank look. So I reminded her that if she was going to refuse to work the whole building by herself why should I be expected to?
She stood there a minute and then said, "Ok, you got me."
Later, she came charging up to the nurses station shaking with anger and said something was going on at her house and she was so mad she couldn't stand it and could I call anyone to come in and help.
Being the pushover I am, I told her to just go home at 11.
She calmed down almost immediately.
Later, I saw her chatting with the CNA's, laughing and going out to smoke. This ran all over me and the more I thought about it the madder I got. When she came over at 10:30pm to give me report and leave I couldn't stand it anymore. I told her she had more drama in her life than a soap opera and i just KNEW she was going to muster up some reason she couldn't stay like she promised she would. Furthermore, she expects everyone else to adhere to strict standards but these standards don't apply to her (she leaves two hours early every night, in spite of saying she has too much on her and carries a heavier workload than anyone else.)
Anyway, she gets real quiet and walks away, then comes back and starts making snarky remarks about how I had no right to talk to her that way. I shot back with some remarks of my own while she kept mouthing off and that is where it ended.
I can't blame you for being upset. I would too. Calling her on it was the right thing to do. However, I'm not sure it was done in the best mannor. I understand when your in the heat of the momment it is hard to stay composed. Maybe you should have had a cool down period first then approached her more professionally. Sounds like she was manipulating the situation to make you feel bad and give her what she wanted--to go home! Sounds like she has a problem with the physical demands of her job as a nurse. A good idea would be to talk to your manager or DON and discuss the issues. Good Luck!!
Had almost the situation happen at my hospital. We had a new nurse in my dept. He had just passed his boards and this was his first position. But EVERY night he had some excuse for why he had to leave early. The wife, the kid, the grandpa, the dog.. He also was pet to the DON. She always covered his excuses. Finally I went to admin. They knew nothing about his always leaving early since he has being paid for 72 hours every pay period. We clocked in & out via computer and his hours were accounted for. After an investigation, it came out the DON had been clocking him out every night.
Seems during nursing school he had worked at the bar she and her husband owned in the next county. They had loaned him money to attend school and he was still paying them back by working for free every night!!!
You never know why some people are willing to go the lengths they do to cover for an employee. Both were terminated!:imbar
What the hell?? I wouldn't believe this story if it were posted on another site..this is unreal!
As was stated before, it was probably not the best thing to do (especially since she seems to have a goood relationship with the CNA's, so that might make things harder on you later if they decide to retialiate on drama queen's behalf) BUT...... I can soooo see why you did it. True, if you had perhaps gone to her and told her why you were upset, it might have worked out better for you both, but getting caught up in the heat of the moment is understandable. Not justifiable, but understandable. I would apologize, especially being as if she goes to the DON, you might really start to regret it, no matter how much she deserved it. Something obviously needed to be said to her.
Something else struck me about your situation with this co-worker. How can she get away with leaving early so much???? This should be a red flag to the DON?? I used to work in long-term care but now I work at a nearby hospital. To the best of my knowledge "NO ONE" could leave their shift til the next nurse came on. At the hospital they are very strict about attendance. You get docked if you leave your shift early and they have a point system. After you reach a certain point you are fired. She is obligated to her patients and to her employer. My hospital just layed nurses off. She should be glad she has a job!! It is easy to see how you could get so irritated with her. The only solution for you is to go to your DON and explain how this is getting to you and how it is affecting your work relationship with this nurse and in turn I'm sure it is spilling over onto the patients you are obligated to care for. Can you work alterate days then this nurse so you don't have to be the one deal with this? If the DON doesn't already see a problem with this nurse than possibly she needs some classes on her role as leader. I am so glad I work at the hospital. We do self scheduling aside of our weekend. So if there is someone I don't particually want to work with I can just schedule myself on opposite days. Good Luck!!
Ms New RN was all of 23 and lived at home with Mommy and Daddy and I was in my mid 30s married mother of 4 who had 2 car payments/a mortgage and was in Nursing School which I was paying for. I told her I must respect her because she is a nurse and did just pass her boards, but she in turn must also respect me because I am her elder, and I told her she can no longer call me by my 1st name but can only refere to me as Mrs Racing-Mom.
Sorry but I don't see any simple respect here. If she had a problem with the RN she should have reported it to the nurse manager and not handled it by saying "I have to respect you but you have to respect me because I am your elder and you can no longer call me by my first name". Sorry but that's just childish. She was like all of 10 years older. People 10 years older than me don't earn my respect simply by being a little older
---she had not exp life yet, that was the point, yes she graduated school and passed her boards, but she was clueless in the everyday world.
Some 23 years old have experienced enough life for 2 people. You shouldn't judge people simply by their age. There are mature 23 year olds and immature 33 years old regardless of whether or not they have children, bills, a mortgage, a car payment...I'm sure making her call you by your last name really helped the situation.
Some 23 years old have experienced enough life for 2 people. You shouldn't judge people simply by their age. There are mature 23 year olds and immature 33 years old regardless of whether or not they have children, bills, a mortgage, a car payment...I'm sure making her call you by your last name really helped the situation.
Why are you so upset by this?
The new nurse was rude and condescending. Perhaps the response wasn't perfect but there is really no need for you be so defensive about it.
And I do expect some deference from those young enough to be my children simply because of my age. I give to my elders and expect the same from others. That doesn't mean that a young person does not deserve the respect due one's position, but unless one is guilty of extreme hubris or insecurity one does not order someone around about things such as water pitchers or snacks first. It smacks of a kid trying to assert authority and power for no reason other than that she can.
had almost the situation happen at my hospital. we had a new nurse in my dept. he had just passed his boards and this was his first position. but every night he had some excuse for why he had to leave early. the wife, the kid, the grandpa, the dog.. he also was pet to the don. she always covered his excuses. finally i went to admin. they knew nothing about his always leaving early since he has being paid for 72 hours every pay period. we clocked in & out via computer and his hours were accounted for. after an investigation, it came out the don had been clocking him out every night.
seems during nursing school he had worked at the bar she and her husband owned in the next county. they had loaned him money to attend school and he was still paying them back by working for free every night!!!
you never know why some people are willing to go the lengths they do to cover for an employee. both were terminated!:imbar
ahaa!! "oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive."
excellent sleuth work shelly304 :yeah:good going!!! :urck:
And I do expect some deference from those young enough to be my children simply because of my age. I give to my elders and expect the same from others. That doesn't mean that a young person does not deserve the respect due one's position, but unless one is guilty of extreme hubris or insecurity one does not order someone around about things such as water pitchers or snacks first. It smacks of a kid trying to assert authority and power for no reason other than that she can.
i too, have always shown elders respect...
i'm talking about at least a generational difference in age.
i don't care if these elders are obnoxious or disrespectful.
i still bow to an-always-not-so-obvious wisdom that comes w/living so long.
as for the remainder of the population, it's fair game.
but even when/if i'm disrespected, i choose to take the high road and remain respectful to extent possible.
I'm still fuming over it. It wasn't like last night was an isolated incident. It was the straw that broke the camel's back.
The assistant DON is on the list of people who can't stand her but says she is powerless to do anything about her because she is the DON's pet.
She is also the biggest butt kisser in the nursing home. It's sickening to see how she carries on, really.
She is the one who acts as if everything good that happens is because of her, and everything wrong that happens is because I told you so...she is very insecure and immature. Narcissistic. She is also mentally unstable.
Someone said I shouldn't make it personal but that is kind of hard. It is personal. She has a new and more compelling reason every night that she needs to leave two or more hours early and in the same breath she will criticize others and say they need to finish their shift. This is no lie. The hypocrisy is that blatant.
In retrospect, I wish I had not lost my temper, but again, it wasn't that incident alone. It has been accumulating for a long time. It's funny to see how people walk on eggshells and tiptoe around. They don't want to rock the boat. But now I'm the captain, I guess. If more people would come out...there was a couple of witnesses who cheered me when she left.
I still don't feel good about it. This woman is pitiful. Unfortunately, she is sick, too.
Enough is enough! You had your fill of her, and you had reached your breaking point. We all have limits, and you do not need to apologize for what you did. If more people spoke thier mind, there wouldn't be so much of this passive/aggressive nonsense. Good for you for refusing to be a doormat.
i suspect it had to do with the relative levels of maturity of the two individuals. and after 30 years as an rn, i'm not sure that i consider the rns to be the "superior at work" of an lpn or cna unless we're deliberately placed in a supervisory role. we each have our own job to do, and the presence of a good cna sure makes mine easier!
nurses do have the job of supervising cnas, but do not have the power to appropriately address problems that may occur.
gilf7243
29 Posts
I can't blame you for being upset. I would too. Calling her on it was the right thing to do. However, I'm not sure it was done in the best mannor. I understand when your in the heat of the momment it is hard to stay composed. Maybe you should have had a cool down period first then approached her more professionally. Sounds like she was manipulating the situation to make you feel bad and give her what she wanted--to go home! Sounds like she has a problem with the physical demands of her job as a nurse. A good idea would be to talk to your manager or DON and discuss the issues. Good Luck!!