If I hear that one more time I swear I am going to stop wherever I am and scream. Literally. I will stand there and scream until The People come to take me away for evaluation. :uhoh21:
I haven't worked staff at a facility for a very long time so I haven't had to deal with this issue personally in eons but it still chaps my hide every time I hear it.
Today I was supposed to meet my sister for lunch. I arrived at her facility and waited in the car at the designated spot. She didn't come down after 15 min so I called up to the unit (I used to work there). The secretary told me she said to meet her on the unit and we could eat in the staff cafeteria instead. I didn't understand why but when I went up to the floor I saw a huge semi-circle around Nursing Station B comprised of nurses, aides, administrative big-wigs, and family members of a particular resident. Particular as in picky. I hear, from the ENTRANCE of the unit the man of the family (father, uncle, whatever?) yelling "I want her fired!" He is pointing at this poor aide slinked low against the nursing station half crying, half yelling something about new bed linens. The rest of the staff, my sister included, are trying to calm down the man and his female companion, meanwhile he is still yelling "I want her fired. If this is the type of trash you hire in this facility then you should be closed down and I'm going to call State."
:nono:Oh, no, not those words. That's a bad threat.
So now this poor girl may lose her job. I don't know for sure because obviously my sis didn't get a lunch, or rather, I had to leave before I even spoke to her, so I don't know if she got a lunch or not. But she missed OUR lunch date because some layman read somewhere or heard somewhere that if you threaten to call State you can get anything you want. That is an abuse of power and it peeves me to no end. Further, I feel it is highly improper and rude that a family member can dictate who is or isn't employed at a facility.
This is not to say that she didn't deserve to be reprimanded. I don't know what she did, but I highly doubt it is worthy of being fired and even if it IS, that should be at the discretion of the facility not a family member.
I'm sorry Southernbeegirl, now I feel bad about what I wrote. I guess you had to do what you had to at that moment. It worked out better for you anyway. Me? I'm a hothead; I would have made the situation 100X worse and I would have been fired.
I'm glad you're quitting and I hope you find something else really soon.
I'm sorry Southernbeegirl, now I feel bad about what I wrote. I guess you had to do what you had to at that moment. It worked out better for you anyway. Me? I'm a hothead; I would have made the situation 100X worse and I would have been fired.
I'm glad you're quitting and I hope you find something else really soon.
good lord dont feel bad!!
i totally appreciate all the "love" i got from yall. it was certainly something i "needed" to hear, even if i didnt want to!
When I was a student a pt's family member started screaming at me for some reason I had no clue about (they had mistaken me for another student). Anyway, I just looked them in the eye and said I'll come back and talk to you when you've calmed down, otherwise, you can take your complaint up with secuirty. THey just stopped dead in their tracks, mumbled something about needing to move their car and off they went.
I dont' have time for that kind of **** antics. I'm from a family of lawyers, I have a year of law school under my belt, I know enough about the employment laws and medical professionals laws to know what a pt's family can acheive, and its not a lot by screaming and swearing without having all the facts. Seesh.
i swear i looked around to see if i was being punk'd, lol
Honest to god I could not get that image of you pushing thier grandkid around in a WC, I would have thought you were getting punked too...It just enrages me when mgmt does not stand up for the front line staff. If they think we are idiots then dont hire us, if they think we are capable of doing the job they hired us for, then by all means let us do it!!
I am glad to know you were the supervisor that day and not pawning your other patients off on the rest of the staff so you could make soup and babysit for the loud mouths!!!
We just had a family in like that recently--we as a team tried to bond togather to not let them run our unit, but one nurse caved and gave them what they wanted and then it was 10xs harder on the rest of us to do our jobs. it was not the patient, it was the patients crazy wife---whose name shall never be spoken again!!!
cant wait to read the post of your resignation!!! Good luck!!
This is customer service crap at its worst. I'm sorry but management should be there to back up their staff, not throw them under the bus. I don't know about you but I have two critically ill patients to take care of and I do not have the time to make soup or push some kid in a freakin' WC nor would I do it. I would hand in my resignation the next day. I'm too good of a person to let some crazy family members who think hospital=hotel or management to push me around. This is the reason why we don't have enough nurses because no one wants to put up with that crap.
On a side note, the people that give in to all the demands of these family members are the WORST. They need to stop it. I've been in situations where I've put my foot down and then the next shift's RN gets the family whatever they want.
unfortunately, the hospitals are set up to solicit complaints... they are a chronic complainer's paradise. even more unfortunately, you must bend over backwards to kiss their asses after they complain, only reinforcing their behavior.
yet another reason to hate working on the floor :).
Yes it's called 'enabling'- something management is good at & expects us to do too. (& nurses are good at it!) Unfortunately, I haven't worked a unit yet where the staff is supported by management when a family member chooses to cause a scene!! (whether or not the complaint is justified or not is a moot point). I am a bit surprised that the manager didn't usher the complainer to a private office or area in the interest of other patients/families.
Knowledge is power. In many instances, the tables can be turned on these 'system abusers' through a working knowledge of the law.
Having had just a little bit of exposure to the criminal justice system as a career cop in my previous life...
In the original CNA's defense, as a floor nurse I would have quietly asked the bullying family member to follow me to the CN's office to continue the conversation... as he was committing a breech of the law through his disorderly conduct, and that we needed to get his formal complaint down on paper to pursue actions against the young CNA. Once alone with the complaintant and Charge Nurse, I'd have explained to the CN that Mr. Bully had confessed in front of the floor staff to having watched the female pt in his mother's room being bathed. This meets the required elements of the crime of 'Carnal Knowlege' (or 'Peeping Tom' depending upon your jurisdiction), in that he committed "the secret observation of the activities of another person for the purpose of spying on them and invading their privacy"... so, if he was being honest in his accusations against the CNA, and wasn't merely mistaken, then we were legally bound to sign a criminal complaint against the bully on these sexual deviance charges. (And then watch the blood drain from his face!)
Security should have been called to escort that loud-mouth idiot out of the hospital. I think there are more pressing issues for nurses and administration to be taking care of and NOT bed linens.
I remember this patient we had in the OR who was angry because he had to wait for two hours in the waiting room. He came in yelling at one of the nurses, he was large and intimidating and shook his fist at her. No one did anything so I walked up to him and loudly told him that either he stops his threatening behaviour or the operation will be cancelled because none of us will be putting up with your behaviour. He looked really surprised that a mere nurse would tell him off but he shut his mouth and we went on with the operation.
I think the problem with these idiots is that nurses just want to get on with their job, placate them because it makes life easier for everyone. It works in the short term, but long term is NOT helping the problem with bad behaviour because they are getting away with it. Unless we're willing to say NO, you will not speak to me in this manner then it's not going to improve.
Lovely_RN, MSN
1,122 Posts
I'm sorry Southernbeegirl, now I feel bad about what I wrote. I guess you had to do what you had to at that moment. It worked out better for you anyway. Me? I'm a hothead; I would have made the situation 100X worse and I would have been fired.
I'm glad you're quitting and I hope you find something else really soon.