And while I know better and I let it slip I made a 100, because on other tests lots of people made a 100. Turns out lots of other people did poorly and are talking beyond my back how I breezed through the test and I'm trying to make them feel inferior.
These are grown people in an RN to BSN program.
I did not breeze through this test, I studied as hard as anyone else. I'm sorry for those that studied real hard and was blown away from this test. I know what that feels like too. It hurts to study and bomb a test. But why bring down the person who did better than you?
I'm sorry you're allowing someone else the power to make you feel petty, and I'm sorry your bitterness doesn't allow to share the joy with someone who did better than you.
Sorry, just venting. I know from experience not to share grades and I'll never do that again.
Get this, someone emailed me and said three people had emailed her that they were thinking about dropping out because I said I made 100 and felt inferior and couldn't hack it. And did I know how fragile other people can be.
Gee, I didn't know I held the power to decide if these fragile people drop out or not.
That is so dysfunctional to me.
Oh Puuuhhhhllleeeaaasssseee!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dysfunctional is right Tweety. They are trying to make you feel guilty for something you in no way should feel guilty about!!! It IS amazing how people get so petty when they feel threatened by someone else! Anyway........if a bunch of people did poorly and you were the only one that did really well, well then why would they say they "were thinking of dropping because they were feeling inadequate?" Apparantly they are just NORMAL and you are exceptional. Get over it already people. Ugghh.
Anyway, Tweety, :cheers: You rock! Great job and I wish you the best of luck in easing your stress. I look forward to your posts here and since I have been posting, it has been very noticeable how supportive you are to others, no matter the OP. You really convey that you care and it means alot to me as well as many others around here too I am sure!!!:)
Get this, someone emailed me and said three people had emailed her that they were thinking about dropping out because I said I made 100 and felt inferior and couldn't hack it. And did I know how fragile other people can be.
Gee, I didn't know I held the power to decide if these fragile people drop out or not.
That is so dysfunctional to me.
I feel like being snotty and telling them I know of a real good therapist where these fragile students can get therepy.
I'm not insensitive. God knows it's a tough course and we're all stressed out. I'm as stressed out as others (those who read the daily threads in the breakroom or my blog know this).
Anyway, thanks for the good wishes. That's why I posted, I know I could vent and get it off my chest. Get things in perspective and move on.
Lesson learned.
Geez, how can they make such a big deal out of something so insignificant IMO. I mean if someone got a good grade and I didn't it isn't the end of the world. Sure I am entitled to feel kinda sad or even upset at MYSELF but then have to mustard up the courage to study harder to improve next time.
Obviously nursing is not that important if they plan to drop out because they feel inferior. Cause let me tell you, nothing can be that depressing or terrible (but death) that will make we want to quit.
Frankly Tweety, you should not feel bad. Be proud and happy because you have done nothing wrong. This situation is just an added headache which you don't need. I say you stop thinking about it and just let them do as they please.
I sure remember how weird I felt--guilty, almost--when I aced an exam and the next best grade was in the 60s.
Thank goodness they all were cool with it when they finally badgered me into telling them what I made. Until then, they were hoping that the test could be graded on a curve, but my good mark completely blew it for them.
So I understand completely. Those people who emailed you about "fragile" egos really need to get a grip, know what I mean? Because what are you supposed to do? Apologise that you aced a test and felt really really good about yourself? Because honestly, until the past few months, you've always been either really modest or maybe lacking some confidence when it comes to academics and this is just what kind of a boost you needed.
Would they begrudge you that based on some "frail ego" theory?
They've gotta be kidding.
Be proud. You have every right to be.
We're right behind you all the way. And frankly--I have to admit you've got me thinking about going back for my BSN. But shhhh! don't tell anyone....
Secondly, I get the same thing in my program. I haven't pulled anything below a 93 on any test so far and neither has another girl I study with. There are also alot of people doing well, but the ones that aren't seem to have some sort of problem with us that are. Wierd as it sounds. The first test ever everyone was nervous. One gal got a 79 (in this class a 75 is passing and anything below is fail) anyhow this one gal made a comment to me after the 4th test about "This is second nature to you" It sort of made me angry because if everyone in my class knew how hard I study daily and weekly to pull those 90's! Argh! In my program they are all older adults too! I'm 38, have 3 kids (one of which is 17 months old) and I work as a CNA on the weekends in a hospital on an ortho floor. So I study my butt off.
Specializes in Lactation Ed, Pp, MS, Hospice, Agency.
Tweety,
enjoy the fruits of your labor. I, being one who has problems testing, and would love to be the one that got the "A" am very proud of you... only once in my lifetime have I been the one w/the highest score (6th grade, Natural Disasters... Funny how I remember this!). There are people out there who will always "put you down" for doing your best. There is no need to "dumb it down" for them. They r only wishing they were you at that very moment! I have ALWAYS been happy for my classmates when they have done well! (So, not everyone is like your classmates)
(Gee I am now glad that I test by myself, in a quiet room, w/o any of that silly adolescent crap to deal with!) (*Benefit of having ADD*)
It ain't anyone else's business but your own about how you are doing in your classes (that and any family/friends that aren't in school w/u who want to celebrate w/u!) Take yourself out for a treat & celebrate!
Wow, Tweety ... this thread hits a nerve in me. It is the story of my adolescence from which I still carry many scars. I grew up in a small town where I was the best student in every class all the time. What you are going through now with your classmates is something I had to live with every day throughout junior high and high school -- a stage of life in which your relationships with your peers is so important.
For every success or accomplishment I had (and in a small town, it is impossible to keep everything a secret) ... there was an equally painful punishment inflicted by my classmates. What made my situation worse was the teachers often knew what was going on and didn't do anything to stop it. Those 8 painful years have influenced my feelings about achievement and social relationships throughout my adult life. It's complicated.
While that type of behavior is shameful enough in adolescents, it's even worse in adults. I'm sure you know that.
But here on allnurses.com ----- we applaud your achievements! We know you are a very nice person and have worked hard to do well in school. We have read your kind, supportive posts to other nurses in their times of need. We have seen your terrific attitude towards advancing your education. And we know that you never intended your achievements to hurt anyone else.
Congratulations on your fine performance. Keep up the good work!
My father had a plaque inscribed with the Latin phrase, "Illigimi non carbarundum". It translates, "Don't let the b******s grind you down." I think it more than applies in this case.
llg
Gee thanks so much for the kind words.
I had a pretty painful adolences myself and know the sting of rejection by peers. And yes it does carry on into adulthood, especially my very young adulthood (I had issues in the 80s, but that's another thread. LOL). Which is probably why my initial reaction was to be upset, feel bad that maybe it was me and I was wrong for telling what my grade was. (I'm still not going to tell ever again. :))
I also remember some gradewise rejection. We had one teacher who would also go down the role and we had to give her our grade outloud so she could mark it in her role. I always felt "different" and shameful if my grade was better than everyone elses. But it was nothing like yours, as I didn't become an A student until 10th grade and college.
But you're right about one thing....it's childish when adults are doing it.
Thanks again everyone. I'm feeling sooooooooooooo much better about this situation.
If I brag about a grade, it's because I worked very hard. Not because I'm an arrogant showoff. I've always been one of those students that doesn't "breeze" through or have it come naturally, I've got to study and then study some more.
Tweety...Be proud of yourself.. :) You did great on your test. Don't let those simple minded people bring you down. I am proud of you and keep up the great work! You studied hard and you got the great grade you deserve. In my opinion Your classmates have some more grwoing up to do. They should be cheering you on and not trying to bring you down. Better yet instead of them talking about you behind your back they should be studying harder so everyone in your class can be proud of their achievements.
Like I told my sister, when she beat a girl in a track meet and the girl was very unkind to her, next time just tell her, "hey it's awful hard work being this wonderful."
Jealousy is ridiculous, but we see it everyday. I get it too, all the time, whether I flaunt grades or not. Dang, it's not my fault I happen to be smart. Some people are blessed with beauty, some with brains, some with particularly good people skills. There's room for everyone you know...
Congratulations on your aceing the test! Don't let the others get you down. You didn't mean to boast. I've been in the same situation, and since then I keep my grades to myself (unless they're not-so-great, then I'll tell others how I did).
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Curious1alwys, BSN, RN
1,310 Posts
Oh Puuuhhhhllleeeaaasssseee!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dysfunctional is right Tweety. They are trying to make you feel guilty for something you in no way should feel guilty about!!! It IS amazing how people get so petty when they feel threatened by someone else! Anyway........if a bunch of people did poorly and you were the only one that did really well, well then why would they say they "were thinking of dropping because they were feeling inadequate?" Apparantly they are just NORMAL and you are exceptional. Get over it already people. Ugghh.
Anyway, Tweety, :cheers: You rock! Great job and I wish you the best of luck in easing your stress. I look forward to your posts here and since I have been posting, it has been very noticeable how supportive you are to others, no matter the OP. You really convey that you care and it means alot to me as well as many others around here too I am sure!!!:)