Jump to content

I feel like quitting...

My family is deeply affected by my schedule and the amount of homework I have. My kids are always bummed when I study or have to go to clinicals or school. My husband works afternoons and doesn't see our kids until the weekends--that is, if he's not working weekends. I drive my kids back and forth to school everyday because they don't have busing for their school. I haven't cooked or cleaned anything in weeks. My husband doesn't do much housework or cooking either. Our house is a mess. The cost of gas is absolutely killing us. I'm half way through my 3rd quarter. I know I can finish this quarter, but returning for the 4th is something I'm reconsidering.

If I quit, I honestly don't know when I would be able to return, or if I would even want to (I'm kind of old). I have student loans I have to pay back.

I'm truly torn. I miss my family so much and they miss me. I don't work, and not having anything pressing to do for too long actually depresses me, so hopefully having the entire summer off will give me a fresh perspective.

my3suns

Specializes in Peds; Cardiac, NICU, PACU.

:hug:

I know it is overwhelming right now I am a mother of 3 and my DH works too, but look on the brightside you are in and there is a light at the end of the tunnel. If you stop now all the hard work and the times that your kids missed you would be worth nothing. Take your summer break and defrag and enjoy some QT time with the family and come back ready to go!

Why would you go through everything you have gone through just to quit? That sounds crazy to me!!!! A quarter is what, 12 weeks? Pretty sure you can do this. You wouldn't want to end up regretting a decision like that. All those student loans would be for pretty much nothing.... : /

My mom worked and went to school full time when I was a kid. Yes, those couple of years were hard on us, but she is so happy in her life now. I now have the utmost respect for her...Shes actually an inspiration to me. Just something to think about.

Remember, you got this.

Don't give up!!! You've come so far! Your children might not understand now, but they will understand in the future!! :redpinkhe:redpinkhe It WILL be worth it in the end and EVERYONE will be very thankful for it. I'm sure it's hard, I can't imagine having kids going to nursing school, but I do know what it's like to have a Mom that you look up to and inspire to be like :) Your kids will too!! Spend the summer hanging out with the family!! Enjoy your time off!! My NS is YEAR ROUND! No break for me :(

Thank you for the encouragement. My husband doesn't make it easy for me when he throws a big man tantrum. I can deal with all of the stuff I posted about, but not when my husband complains about my school, the house, the kids. I told him that when he complains to me and it sounds like he's yelling, and he's all flustered about everything, it makes it really hard to want to stay in school. My first priority is my family, so when he behaves this way, I feel like I'm put in a very precarious position.

We've worked it out, for now :rolleyes:. I think nursing school is harder on my family than it is for me.

You are SO close! Soooooooooooooo close! Stick it out it will be worth it :)

I could have written your post! Don't give up. I know it is so frustrating, I feel like I am putting so much strain on my family and my kids. They are always asking me when I will be done with school and are upset when I have to go to clinicals or to the library to study. My house is in shambles. My family is eating frozen food for dinner half the time. It sucks. But it will all be worth it in the end. By doing this, you will be able to provide a better life for your family. Hang in there. Enjoy your summer, relax, clean your house and have fun with your kids (that's my plan!) And know that there are many others in your same shoes.

Good luck to you!

I have been a sahm/student for oh... a few years now :uhoh3: and I am starting NS in a few weeks :yeah::yeah::yeah:

I am working on organizing this family so that when I have time to relax with them - I am able to enjoy some QT with them. For example: dh and I meal plan on the weekend, and then we know what we need for meals all week. Chores are divided up - they used to be primarily mine, but when everyone splits it all, it really gets done fast. Dividing them over the course of the week (a dusting here, vaccuum there) means a few minutes of chores for each person/day. No biggie. And most importantly - NS is going to be my FT job. Period. Class and studying and clinicals are not optional - just like going to the office 5 days/week for other working moms is not an option for them.The good thing - when you are done and start working as a nurse - you will have flexibility in your career and have earned that RN you worked so hard for!

When my dh gets needy or doesn't do his share - I will remind him of the financial sacrifice that being a one income family really is and that he agreed to support me in my nursing career. So you need to stop feeling guilty. Start delegating and make the time you are not studying and in class/clinicals QT to be enjoyed. Not stressful and ridden with guilt. School will be over before you know it! :nurse:

You're showing your children somethings like an education are worth what it takes. You mentioned you are older. Yes, getting an education when you don't have a family to take care would be easier. Some people can preach it to their children, you live by example.

Put on the big girl pants and get organized. Make a schedule for chores where the family can share in what needs to be done. Everybody gets a job. It teaches responsablity. Most important- Do not give up!

My husband used to throw tantrums over me going to school too and I regretted that I quit when he did this. The rewards at the end will be worth your efforts. Then you can clean your house to your heart's content with a smile on your face!

My husband used to throw tantrums over me going to school too and I regretted that I quit when he did this. The rewards at the end will be worth your efforts. Then you can clean your house to your heart's content with a smile on your face!

Did you return? I'm not going to quit. I have way too much invested in this. Besides, I really can't see myself being anything else.

Against the grain should be a way of life

What's worth the price is always worth the fight

Every second counts 'cause there's no second try

So live like you're never living twice

Don't take the free ride in your own life

These are lyrics to Nickelback's today was your last day.

For my program we had a meeting where we had to bring our support group, (spouse, parents, etc..) it was so they could understand that this was gonna be a difficult program and the wife or husband was gonna need to pick up the slack around the house (cleaning, washing, etc..). They also addressed that the support group can either make or break the student. Please don't give up! many people would die to be in your shoes. Try to make your husband understand the pros of you finishing school (more stable income, a new car, vacations) I bet if you make it through the program he'll understand why you did it.

Against the grain should be a way of life

What's worth the price is always worth the fight

Every second counts 'cause there's no second try

So live like you're never living twice

Don't take the free ride in your own life

These are lyrics to Nickelback's today was your last day.

For my program we had a meeting where we had to bring our support group, (spouse, parents, etc..) it was so they could understand that this was gonna be a difficult program and the wife or husband was gonna need to pick up the slack around the house (cleaning, washing, etc..). They also addressed that the support group can either make or break the student. Please don't give up! many people would die to be in your shoes. Try to make your husband understand the pros of you finishing school (more stable income, a new car, vacations) I bet if you make it through the program he'll understand why you did it.

It's not a matter of IF I make it through, it's a matter of when I make it through :).

After my husband and I settled down, I came to realize that the nursing program is a lot more difficult on him than it is me. And I also realized that because of our schedules, we miss each other terribly and that really is the root of our issue. I hate to see my husband and kids hurting over a choice I made and a choice I could change. So, I feel guilty, and that's something I have been struggling with, and sometimes it clouds that little light at the end of the tunnel.

Yes, support is vital!! We were told this, too, at our meeting with our support group. I often thank my husband and my kids for going through the nursing program with me, and remind them that it's temporary, and when it's over, they will be rewarded for all of their support and hard-work.

By the way, I love that song.

Don't quit. You put your family through this much, so why quit and having nothing to show for it? Kids are resilient. They'll hate it for one more quarter, and then they'll have their mom back. And when they grow up, they'll look up to that. You're so close to being done! Stick it out.

If you quit now than all the time and sacrafice over the last three semesters was a complete waste of time.

Well, the husband and kids need to change and start doing more for themselves. Things won't be much different once you go to work, will they? You won't be home all the time, and you may very likely wind up working nights. Kids and husbands can and should help clean and cook and do other household chores. If the husband gripes, ask him whether he wants another $50k - $60k of household income or not, and just how important is that housewife stuff in light of that.

iPink, BSN, RN

Specializes in Critical Care, Postpartum.

OP, after reading some of your posts, I'm glad you decided to not give up. If it's possible, try to fit in a time you and your husband have a date night or the entire family have family game night.

You finishing and graduating is benefiting you as well as the entire family and I hope they understand that. I have a few people in my nursing program who also have spouses going through Med school at the same time. I don't know how they make it, but they are.

×

By using the site you agree to our Privacy, Cookies, and Terms of Service Policies.

OK