I dont know where to begin. I just do not want to be a nurse anymore. I really never did, since 2nd year of nsg school, but I didn't want to quit such a big commitment,I graduated. I have no desire to be a med surg nurse, in fact I would probably stink at it. I cant imagine being a med surge nurse. Thats why I went into ER right out of school, left that, did pedi home health for a while, now I am in the OR. I liked that for the first few weeks, now I hate that too. I dont know if its nursing, me, or I just cant hack it. The problem is I need this job I have for the benefits, and my salary. Plus my husband will *flip out* if I quit another job again. But I truely believe I shouldnt be in such a profession as nursing if my heart isn't in it..but.what else can I do? Is there anything you guys can suggest career/husband wise????? I have been telling him I love this new job, everythings going great, and actually it is, except that I am a nervous wreck inside, and I am counting the hours til lunch, break, and quitting time. I actually think he might divorce me if I quit!!! (or at the least be very very bitter towards me) I dont know whats bothering me more: the fact that I dont want to be a nurse, or the fact that I will dissapoint my family. Help......any advice will be appreciated.........
You sound really scared to make a mistake and I can relate. There is soo much responsiblity put on nurses today that how can we possibly remember everything? I think you should maybe look into public health where you are not working in bed side nursing. Or maybe long term care maybe better suited for you as it is not as stressful because the patients are not as sick. If they become critical you send them out to hospital. It is something to think about. I am not saying that long term care is easy by all means, but it can be less stressful than ER or the OR. Nursing can take you in soo many directions, I wouldn't close the doors to nursing as there are many diversity's to the title "nurse" keep looking and be openminded. There is more to nursing outside the hospital.
You really think so? Whenever I have been in the hospital, I have such a high respect for the nurses. I look at them as if they were doctors. It is good to hear the down side of nursing before I take the plunge, but I am concerned about all this stress that people seem to be talking about. Is it just a matter of tuning it out?
Absolutely not (just tuning it out that is)! While I am still limited somewhat in my experience as a nurse, I can tell you that in the 3 clinical areas where I have worked (and presently work), it has been so stressful. I find myself constantly asking myself why I am putting myself through this stress. And the only answer I keep coming up with is that once I am finally a truly "seasoned" nurse, I will be going back to school to become a Nurse Practitioner. I'm sure that has its own stresses, but it can't be anything close to bedside nursing where you can expect to:
1) run yourself completely ragged, often not even having time for lunch as well as plan to work several hours a week off the clock because instead of seeing a dedicated employee, management views you as an extra cost if they have to pay you any more than the 36 hours a week they've been budgeted for you to work
2) wear a spectra-link phone (like a hospital cell phone) that OFTEN rings at the whim of patients with trivial issues, or pharmacists calling you for something that they should be calling the doctor about, or family members calling and wanting you to break HIPAA laws and reveal detailed info about their loved ones that actually the doctor should be answering (really just to name a few), all while you are trying to complete the 5 other things you should have gotten done 10 minutes ago, except that you couldn't because of having the other 2-3 more pressing issues that came up or 5 other interruptions you've had in the meantime
I won't even go into 3,4,5,6, etc. And God help you if you have a lazy tech who does not answer her phone or is "always busy" when you need her.
I know this sounds harsh, but I just seem to experience many more of these bad days than good days. Don't get me wrong...there are certainly some rewarding moments in nursing. Unfortunately, they just don't outweigh the stresses for the simple reason that you don't have enough time! I hate feeling like I have to always cut people short - I know they sense my anxiety. And I'm always thinking that they think I really don't care. Quite the contrary - I really do. Again, just not much time to show it. That's the thing that bothers me the most. I have a psych background and love nothing more than showing people that they are cared about - but not gonna happen too often in this arena.
Now Renee, keep in mind, I am speaking to you from my experience, which has been on 2 med-surg floors and a few months at an inpatient hospice. I don't want to turn you off from nursing, but just know the honest truth that there is a great deal of stress in hospital nursing. However, before going the NP route, I feel like I need to try ICU nursing because I think the stress is quite different from floor nursing. I would imagine that you would not be constantly interrupted for all 12 hours of your day, running around, wishing you could duplicate yourself.
I completely agree with the others when they say that you need a non-clinical job. It sounds like the stress that you are going through with your current clinical job is not worth it. Life is too short to hate your job so much. There are plenty of other opportunities for you in nursing. You should consider a desk job, or a clinical job that has MUCH less stress. I used to work at medical research company called Quintiles and all that the nurses did was perform ECG's, vital signs, and take some blood. We only worked on all healthy, young, (mostly) male volunteers. That company paid the RN's VERY, VERY good money, and gave them great benefits. Very easy because you knew that nobody was going to die on you, and these guys were able to take care of themselves (i.e. make their own beds, entertain themselves, and do what you asked when you asked it). A lot of nurses started this job after LOOOOOONG years in a clinical setting, and wanted something much more low stress. You could also consider being a school nurse and just hand out Tylenol and Alderall nine months of the year. Imagine not having to work holidays and summers!!! Just some thoughts. I truly feel for you, and hope that you find a good fit for yourself. Don't give up yet, there is a lot of stuff that you can do.
Specializes in UR/PA, Hematology/Oncology, Med Surg, Psych.
I once looked into school nursing, but the pay was low and the benefits wayyy to expensive. I carry my family's medical insurance so it was definitely a no go. One thing that I have found very stressful in nursing, is the fact that you can't ever have a "slack off" kind of day; no "skate" day every now and then. The patient's safety and health is our responsibility. You always have to be "on" and focused. I mean we are all just humans, but we must ignore our discomforts, pain, need to pee or whatever, to be completely available when needed (which is always.) Honestly I sometimes feel like I am just out of caring, but I carry on with a smile (it is difficult sometimes) and try to refresh when I am off of work. It is hard when so many want so much out of you.
Specializes in LTC,SNF,acute,HH,cty health ,clinic,ER..
Well, here's my story. I worked as an aide for 7 years before becoming a nurse. It was the only job that I didn't want to quit a month after starting, so of course advancing my career and becoming a nurse was the next step, right? I have been an RN for 13 months in a rural hospital where we do it all.Tried home health and helping the DON out. These things are ok but not something I would like to do forever. I absolutley hate the feelings I have when I am at work, trying to get an IV in and can't, feeling like a failure because someone has to do my job for me. I hate giving a med after checking and rechecking all the "rights" and then thinking later I have given the wrong med (even though I hadn't). The feeling in my stomach is undescribable. But the worst thing ever is being AT HOME and thinking about my last couple of shifts, worrying about missing something, thinking of how I could have done something different or possibly not remembering to chart something because I didn't have time because I was still trying to get everything else done an hour after I was suppose to be off shift. I want a job that I don't have to think about until I am actually there. I don't want to feel sick to my stomach before, during, and after every shift. I am now checking into going to school to be a medical lab tech. I wish I wouldn't have wasted $31,000, but what is more important, being a happy loving mother and wife, or money? By the way, I am not depressed and the issue in this thread does not necessarily mean the person needs counseling. It just means there are some who can do this job and there are some who cannot.
Specializes in Community Health, Med-Surg, Home Health.
When I mentioned counseling, I also meant career counseling. Sometimes, we work hard to get into a career and once we get there, we realize that it is not what it is all cracked up to be. Nursing school can fool us that way...we may really envision ourselves to be FLorence Nightingale, but the real world has become too technical; not enough staff and too many patients. It is very rare that you get someone that will literally hold your hand, guide and protect you in nursing...they usually throw you out there, and they really feel that school gave us all that we need, NCLEX supposedly ensured the public that they sent safe nurses out into the field, and when they place you on the unit, it is every man for himself.
I do wish you luck, and I do also suggest that you look into other things that nursing offers besides bedside care. I am an LPN working in a clinic, and it is much better than the floors. I may do the floors every now and then to keep up the skills, but I would probably never return there again permanently, because I did have some of the same feelings that you have. Keep us posted!
Specializes in Community Health, Med-Surg, Home Health.
Wish I was at Disney said:
I once looked into school nursing, but the pay was low and the benefits wayyy to expensive. I carry my family's medical insurance so it was definitely a no go. One thing that I have found very stressful in nursing, is the fact that you can't ever have a "slack off" kind of day; no "skate" day every now and then. The patient's safety and health is our responsibility. You always have to be "on" and focused. I mean we are all just humans, but we must ignore our discomforts, pain, need to pee or whatever, to be completely available when needed (which is always.) Honestly I sometimes feel like I am just out of caring, but I carry on with a smile (it is difficult sometimes) and try to refresh when I am off of work. It is hard when so many want so much out of you.
Nursing can be a very draining career. I come home so tired, and my house is a wreck. My weekends are over before I blink my eye, and there are times where I have stomach aches on Sunday evenings because I know that walking into my clinic for the next week will lead to encountering more needy people that I am limited in how much I can really help. I work in a county hospital where the patients do not have insurance, so it is overcrowded. I prefer working ambulatory care moreso than the floors, but it is still overwhelming!
Specializes in Community Health, Med-Surg, Home Health.
NewRNal said:
I'm glad to know that I am not alone. I hope someone can help me with my dilemma. I graduated from nursing school in May 06 and just recently received by RN license yesterday. As a new grad I was hired to work in the Emergency Room. I was thrilled with this job offer because I decided half way through nursing school that was what I wanted to do. Well after 1 month of working I absolutely hated everything about my job and decided one day I know longer wanted to work there and sent an e-mail to my boss and basically said I was not going back. The problem is I don't know if it was the job itself that I hated so much or if my co workers were the main contributing factor. I found the nurses to be back stabbing and hostile. I have never worked in a hospital before, so when I talked to the nurse manager about what I was feeling she basically said that nurses are like this everywhere so I better just get used to it. So, my question is this: Are nurses like this everywhere you go or is just the ER? I don't know what other department I would like to work in and I am terribly afraid of having the same experience all over again. Any advice?
Nurses are backstabbers everywhere. It stands out more in high stress areas such as ER, med-surg... And they are hostile. Back in the day, it became that way because nursing was so rigid, and now, with the shortage of nurses and the fear that we usually experience, it is hard to form sincere friendships. If the unit we worked in was hard, but we all stuck together, it would still be a pleasure, because we become like family, but instead, it becomes a hostage situation. Maybe consider home care, where you are pretty independent.
Nurses are backstabbers everywhere. It stands out more in high stress areas such as ER, med-surg... And they are hostile. Back in the day, it became that way because nursing was so rigid, and now, with the shortage of nurses and the fear that we usually experience, it is hard to form sincere friendships. If the unit we worked in was hard, but we all stuck together, it would still be a pleasure, because we become like family, but instead, it becomes a hostage situation. Maybe consider home care, where you are pretty independent.
My experience has been different. I have not experienced the "Nurses are backstabbers everywhere" environment. I believe it depends on the unit you work on. There are good team players out there - I work on a 33 bed Medical Intensive Care unit, rarely have more than 2 patients at a time, and love the people I work with (most of them - a few of them are burned out and should quit nursing, and a few of them have God complexes and like to display their "superiority" on a daily basis). I am casual pool only on this unit (no floating) and work with the nurses on all shifts - night shift I care for less - but most everyone helps each other out. Sure . . . there are a few nurses who sit all shift and play computer games despite the rest of us running around like crazy trying to keep our noses above water and our patients stable, but the rest of us - the majority of us (on my unit) help one another out. If I look frazzled one of the other nurses will ask if I need help and if I say I need help then they jump right in - sometimes without me having to actually ask them; and visa versa - even if we are all busy we tag team our patients when possible (I.e. I'll help you get your stuff done and then we will move on to my patient) - it usually winds up that we team up with whoever we are working next to. This is the only nursing job I have ever had so maybe I just lucked out to be working where I am. My unit does have the reputation in our 800 bed hospital of being the best unit to work on (known for the team work and wonderful nurse manager - I think the nurse manager is what makes all the difference!). Anyway - I am certainly grateful for where I work after reading the previous posts.
I'm also right smack dab in the middle of what you're going through as well. Sometimes it's nice to know you're not the only one eh? I'm currently cooking up some plans for an exit. I really enjoy being able to make good money, but I'm at the point where I don't give a damn about it. I just want to be able to enjoy what I do even if it doesn't pay well. Everyone's heard the term "money isn't everything", I always thought yeah right, that's because you don't have any! After leaving nursing I'll probably take a 50% pay cut, but that's alright, I'm going to love what I do and that's all that matters....
Specializes in Cardiac/Telemetry, Hospice, Home Health.
NewRNal said:
I'm glad to know that I am not alone. I hope someone can help me with my dilemma. I graduated from nursing school in May 06 and just recently received by RN license yesterday. As a new grad I was hired to work in the Emergency Room. I was thrilled with this job offer because I decided half way through nursing school that was what I wanted to do. Well after 1 month of working I absolutely hated everything about my job and decided one day I know longer wanted to work there and sent an e-mail to my boss and basically said I was not going back. The problem is I don't know if it was the job itself that I hated so much or if my co workers were the main contributing factor. I found the nurses to be back stabbing and hostile. I have never worked in a hospital before, so when I talked to the nurse manager about what I was feeling she basically said that nurses are like this everywhere so I better just get used to it. So, my question is this: Are nurses like this everywhere you go or is just the ER? I don't know what other department I would like to work in and I am terribly afraid of having the same experience all over again. Any advice?
In my current RN clinical on an ortho unit I have seen nurses literally whispering mean things to eachother about other nurses. I thought - oh my gawd this is what I have read about on allnurses. I know I will not be able to work in an environment where people wear eachother down instead of building eachother up. I am scared this "meaness" is true and that I have made a mistake by going into nursing. I pray that I can fine a niche that is functional and positive...
I just became an LPN last month and am in a fulltime RN program. By my 3rd day orienting in LTC I have had 3 different precepters tell me to do things 3 different ways. I am spinning - and working hard to stay grounded.
tristan
4 Posts
You sound really scared to make a mistake and I can relate. There is soo much responsiblity put on nurses today that how can we possibly remember everything? I think you should maybe look into public health where you are not working in bed side nursing. Or maybe long term care maybe better suited for you as it is not as stressful because the patients are not as sick. If they become critical you send them out to hospital. It is something to think about. I am not saying that long term care is easy by all means, but it can be less stressful than ER or the OR. Nursing can take you in soo many directions, I wouldn't close the doors to nursing as there are many diversity's to the title "nurse" keep looking and be openminded. There is more to nursing outside the hospital.