I HATE my job... I HATE nursing... I've been a nurse going on 2 years and I can honestly say I wish I can go back and do something else. I cringe at the thought of going to work. I honestly feel sick and anxiety kicks in. My first job was in the ICU and while everyone I know was jealous and in awe of how I landed the job, there I was... a new grad in the ICU. I survived my 3 month preceptorship and I was on my own up until I had to move 'cause my spouse was transferred. But even then I was starting to HATE nursing. I can't stand bedside nursing.
I landed a job at our new place in an outpatient oncology clinic and I enjoyed it there up until my coworkers decided it was time to bully me out of the job 'cause I wasn't a local. So I ended up quiting 'cause I kept getting set up to fail. I didn't want to lose my license so I left my wonderful patients after three months.
So here I am in my third job as a tele (more like med surg) nurse at a third rate, barely hanging there hospital. Where do I even begin... Aside from being treated like a third world maid, I am constantly being hounded by drug seeking homeless patients who keep returning to us because the hospital is too hungry for ANY patients they can get their hands on. They will admit ANYONE... even those who have normal labs just to have patients and they bill the state at OUR expense!
Back to my rant... time and time again nurses are disrespected, devalued, and under appreciated by self-entitled patients/families. I can't stand having to wipe butt because they're too lazy to do it themselves, or they get off having someone do it for them when they are fully capable of doing it themselves. I'm tired of managers and coordinators ******** and whining about patient satisfaction when all they do is max you out with patients and give you 12 hrs to be a nanny, maid, servant, miracle worker on top of ensuring documentation is squared away so the hospital can get their reimbursement. I'm tired of nurses who swear they know everything and try to take advantage of you just 'cause they've a nurse longer than you.
I wish switching to another area of nursing was easy. Being where I am, everyone wants at least 2 years of specialty experience. I'm trying to be positive and talk myself into liking what I'm doing. I AM JUST TIRED OF NURSING!!!! I am so depressed and frustrated. I pray every time I go to work that I don't blow up... Of course I will NEVER hurt a patient, it's not in me to do so. However I want out... I REGRET wasting money on a degree I don't plan on using as soon I can find a way out. :-'(
I'm guessing there's no opening at the clinics on base? I didn't care for the clinics on base -- I was told it was hard to get a job there, but I like bedside, and I wasn't that into outpatient.
How much longer until your husband will PCS? Is there a DaVita close by? At my husband's last base, there was an opening at one of their clinics, and they advertised a few new grad positions. I figured since you have some ICU experience, you might be able to get into dialysis.
You know, it's funny: couple of weeks ago someone posted something similar, how she hated nursing, was finally getting out in search of something else....and the thread was piled high with people saying how fabulous nursing was, how she shouldn't have been a nurse in the first place (insinuation was that she wasn't worthy, not that she made a poor choice). In other words, how WRONG she was to feel as she did. Annoyed me, and I said so.
Here, thankfully, the OP has found people who understand what a rat-eat-rat world nursing can be. I don't regret becoming a nurse, but I have without a doubt had jobs that DID make me cry on a regular basis because of how brutal it was. And I thank all that is Holy that I am now someplace where I feel valued and I DON'T cry at all :)
OP, if there is someplace you can find that will fit, maybe following some of these suggestions on this thread, I hope that happens....it would be better than feeling like all that time in school was wasted. I don't wish to return to bedside nursing, I'd seek anything else to avoid it, but I want to continue to use my license.
As I understand, nursing jobs are hard to come by in Hawaii (as if they aren't in most other places!), so you are lucky to have a job that you can use for the "experience" factor. I would take the "experience" factor to be my approach to this job until it is time to leave. When you land, you can either try another nursing venue or change your career choice. Take into consideration what you would like to do if not nursing and if possible try to get started on educating yourself for that role. You might be able to get several online courses under your belt during the remainder of your husband's assignment. The knowledge that you are doing something constructive toward your future could be just the lift you need to be able to get through this unappealing job. If you do leave nursing, keep your nursing license in an inactive status, just in case. Good luck with your decisions.
I'll leave you with this. When you feel the most downtrodden, remind yourself that you do have options. You do NOT have to do this if you don't want to.
well said!...and I am going to keep that advice too
Are there any other oncology clinics you could apply to since you liked the job itself? Bedside nursing is very hard and I think most of us have felt like you do at times. Now with more money pressures and press ganey madness it makes the work even more stressful with higher pt ratios and more computer crap! We all get tired of dealing with the drug seekers and the ones who spend their day drinking living on disability while we bust our ass and have thousands in out of pockets if we have to be hospitalized, but they come in for their regular detox, drive us crazy and then leave and go right back to the bottle, pickle their livers and its diarrhea alley from all the lactulose. lol
I wish you the best and hope you find a better gig soon. Any VA hospitals/clinics in Hawaii because they have the best benefits and top of the line equipment like ceiling lifts!
Specializes in EDUCATION;HOMECARE;MATERNAL-CHILD; PSYCH.
I'll leave you with this. When you feel the most downtrodden, remind yourself that you do have options. You do NOT have to do this if you don't want to.
Yep! Do not regret being a Nurse. You have the key to getting a career/life that you want -YOUR NURSING LICENSE. You do not have to be at the bedside to be a Nurse. With your license, you can do anything. You can SUCCESSFULLY work in any industry.
Specializes in Occ. Hlth, Education, ICU, Med-Surg.
I second that suggestion. Get your master's in ed and teach. I think that's all you'd need if you have your BSN to teach at a community college. I know it's a little more school, but it's better than being miserable.
In the majority of states you will only be able to teach clinicals with a BSN and that involves being in the hospital and at the bedside. Most states require and MSN to teach at the community college level...a Doctoral degree to teach at the University level AND you still have to do clinicals.
You know, it's funny: couple of weeks ago someone posted something similar, how she hated nursing, was finally getting out in search of something else....and the thread was piled high with people saying how fabulous nursing was, how she shouldn't have been a nurse in the first place (insinuation was that she wasn't worthy, not that she made a poor choice). In other words, how WRONG she was to feel as she did. Annoyed me, and I said so.
Here, thankfully, the OP has found people who understand what a rat-eat-rat world nursing can be. I don't regret becoming a nurse, but I have without a doubt had jobs that DID make me cry on a regular basis because of how brutal it was. And I thank all that is Holy that I am now someplace where I feel valued and I DON'T cry at all :)
OP, if there is someplace you can find that will fit, maybe following some of these suggestions on this thread, I hope that happens....it would be better than feeling like all that time in school was wasted. I don't wish to return to bedside nursing, I'd seek anything else to avoid it, but I want to continue to use my license.
Please do not suggest teaching to someone with the smallest sliver of experience and who wants to leave bedside nursing at the earliest opportunity- students deserve to have someone who enjoys the bedside role and who can help them navigate the many pitfalls of nursing by having actually experienced most of them. There's a lot of good advice on this post but I don't think this is some of it since 99.9 percent of new nurses will have a first job that involves direct patient care. I'm not saying the OP should never teach, I just don't think that should be her short term plan.
I feel the same way about nursing. I've been doing this for 9yrs now and trying to get away from bedside nursing. It's been so hard finding jobs away from the bedside lately. I'm also thinking about returning to school in order to leave this profession for good.
You said you enjoyed Oncology, so what about a position as a Nurse Navigator for clinical trials, or a position as a nurse research assistant? And there is always private duty nursing, maybe a pediatric patient? These would get you out of the catty world of a poorly managed hospital. Occupational health clinics, physicians offices, birthing centers, outpatient surgical, etc., may also provide you with some less-stressful opportunities.
I admire your candor in stating exactly how you feel, and I sincerely hope you find your happiness.
well said!...and I am going to keep that advice too
rumwynnieRN
272 Posts
I'm guessing there's no opening at the clinics on base? I didn't care for the clinics on base -- I was told it was hard to get a job there, but I like bedside, and I wasn't that into outpatient.
How much longer until your husband will PCS? Is there a DaVita close by? At my husband's last base, there was an opening at one of their clinics, and they advertised a few new grad positions. I figured since you have some ICU experience, you might be able to get into dialysis.