I was looking at my Medscape highlights feed and saw the headline "Stop Calling Children Resilient" and thought "Ha! That's certainly not an adjective I would pick to describe a lot of kids." but it made me remember-
Often on Fridays I will ask visitors to the health office if they're looking forward to the weekend, do they have anything planned etc., and one day a 7th grader (also, big for her age, she could have passed for a high school freshman) responded: "I have a playdate scheduled."
Really??? What combination of infantilization and/or arrested development is necessary for a girl that age to think that her weekends should consist of "playdates"?
Specializes in Psych, Addictions, SOL (Student of Life).
I might also add that the idea that children are resilient comes from the fact that they are malleable. They are still learning, growing and finding their way in the world. There is a reason that primitive cultures traditionally had rites of adulthood around the age of 13. It was assumed that the child would have learned all he/she needed to know to be a functioning adult. Today's children don't assume the responsibilities of adulthood until well into their 20's sometimes their 30's. this is because today's kids are coddled and pampered and watched over so that they don't meet any real difficulty. While these skills are no longer needed I could track, hunt and field dress a dear by the time I was 15. I was not allowed to drive until I could do basic vehicle maintenance. Most of my son's friends couldn't find their way out of a paper grocery sack.
Growing up when we fell off a horse my dad put us right back in the saddle. This is what builds resilience.
I might also add that the idea that children are resilient comes from the fact that they are malleable. They are still learning, growing and finding their way in the world. There is a reason that primitive cultures traditionally had rites of adulthood around the age of 13. It was assumed that the child would have learned all he/she needed to know to be a functioning adult. Today's children don't assume the responsibilities of adulthood until well into their 20's sometimes their 30's. this is because today's kids are coddled and pampered and watched over so that they don't meet any real difficulty. While these skills are no longer needed I could track, hunt and field dress a dear by the time I was 15. I was not allowed to drive until I could do basic vehicle maintenance. Most of my son's friends couldn't find their way out of a paper grocery sack.
Growing up when we fell off a horse my dad put us right back in the saddle. This is what builds resilience.
Hppy
Do you think that adults who are asking to have books removed from school libraries are helping their children to build resilience? That seems to be a highly publicized trend in "engaged" parenting right now.
Specializes in Psych, Addictions, SOL (Student of Life).
2 hours ago, toomuchbaloney said:
Do you think that adults who are asking to have books removed from school libraries are helping their children to build resilience? That seems to be a highly publicized trend in "engaged" parenting right now.
I am absolutely against the banning of any book. Even those books I don't care for or find offensive. Book burning has been around since the first printing presses made mass publication a reality. It has become so much more damaging now as it has become a part of the cancel culture. If we as a society have a problem with an historical fact or old or new idea that is offensive the current culture simply engages in magical thinking and pretends it never existed. Future generations will continue to make the mistakes of the past because they won't have any idea how such atrocities happen.
I am absolutely against the banning of any book. Even those books I don't care for or find offensive. Book burning has been around since the first printing presses made mass publication a reality. It has become so much more damaging now as it has become a part of the cancel culture. If we as a society have a problem with an historical fact or old or new idea that is offensive the current culture simply engages in magical thinking and pretends it never existed. Future generations will continue to make the mistakes of the past because they won't have any idea how such atrocities happen.
I would agree. Isolating our children from things that we find offensive or unacceptable doesn't build resilience as much as it creates a naiveté.
It has become so much more damaging now as it has become a part of the cancel culture.
...as long as people don't conflate "cancel culture" with "boycott". I'm a firm believer in being able to let your displeasure with someone/something be known by voting with your wallet and/or your presence.
Specializes in Vents, Telemetry, Home Care, Home infusion.
My two 30+yo still live with me as helped care for my DH who passed after lengthy illness at start of covid in 2000. Even they complain about work ethic and expectations of "those younger than us" due to unable hire staff and poor work ethic compared to them. "Computers and cell phones ruining them". Ahhhhh .... same complaints I voiced about their generation. "Were lucky to have you as parents, raising us right" 36yo recently said.
The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.”
The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.”
Is this a quote from someone writing generations ago?
Specializes in Cardiology, School Nursing, General.
On 3/14/2022 at 7:56 AM, Jedrnurse said:
I know!
Plus the rationales for visits. Kids get up from their seats and bump their thighs/knees against the underside of their desks. Yeah, I know, it smarts- we've all done it. But really, you need to leave class to come to the health office??
Sometimes it's the teachers! And I'm like, they're fine!
hppygr8ful, ASN, RN, EMT-I
4 Articles; 5,212 Posts
I might also add that the idea that children are resilient comes from the fact that they are malleable. They are still learning, growing and finding their way in the world. There is a reason that primitive cultures traditionally had rites of adulthood around the age of 13. It was assumed that the child would have learned all he/she needed to know to be a functioning adult. Today's children don't assume the responsibilities of adulthood until well into their 20's sometimes their 30's. this is because today's kids are coddled and pampered and watched over so that they don't meet any real difficulty. While these skills are no longer needed I could track, hunt and field dress a dear by the time I was 15. I was not allowed to drive until I could do basic vehicle maintenance. Most of my son's friends couldn't find their way out of a paper grocery sack.
Growing up when we fell off a horse my dad put us right back in the saddle. This is what builds resilience.
Hppy