How should I go about going to job interviews having two little kids?

ZASHAGALKA, RN · Jul 3, 2005

If I inteviewed someone with kids in tow, I would think that this is a person who's going to have problems arranging to work and I'd expect lots of call-ins, ect because of kids. If you can't arrange daycare for an interview, it calls into serious question your ability to arrange it for work.

And I don't think anybody would hire you.

Many cities/towns now have hourly drop off day care where you pay by the hour. I'd look for one of those. Or find a friend to do a favor for you. Or schedule all your interviews on 1 day and ask your husband to take a personal day.

I WOULD NOT take kids to any job interview where you actually want to be considered for the job.

~faith,

Timothy.

estrogen · Jul 3, 2005

If I inteviewed someone with kids in tow, I would think that this is a person who's going to have problems arranging to work and I'd expect lots of call-ins, ect because of kids. If you can't arrange daycare for an interview, it calls into serious question your ability to arrange it for work.
And I don't think anybody would hire you.
Many cities/towns now have hourly drop off day care where you pay by the hour. I'd look for one of those. Or find a friend to do a favor for you. Or schedule all your interviews on 1 day and ask your husband to take a personal day.
I WOULD NOT take kids to any job interview where you actually want to be considered for the job.
~faith,
Timothy.

I would definately not like to tag my kids along BUT making assumption like yours about the inability to arrange for day care in the future and potential call ins sound very discriminative to me. I have arrangemets for daycare once a week because that is all I need in order to do my work right now. If I need other arrangements in the future, I'll make them. The fact that I am a mother, or even the possibility, that I didn't have anyone close by (or had such a drop-in daycare, that you speek of) instantly available for the hour of the interview, does not make me incompetent. If I was a nursing manager hiring people, I would understand this.. Sorry, but this erks me. :banghead:

gauge14iv, MSN, APRN, NP · Jul 3, 2005

It may irk you but unfortuantely those are the assumptions potential employers are going to make. Bringing kids to an interview is just not professional. I have 5 kids - and I have at times not had daycare on a regular basis. I could always arrange with a friend or a local teenager (especially in the summer) to watch them long enough to go to an interview. What about a mothers day out at a church or something?

fergus51 · Jul 3, 2005

It may not be pc, but I would think the same thing as the previous poster. Job interviews are for making a good first impression and you don't want that first impression to be "I couldn't find anyone to look after my kids". I think the logical assumption would be that this would come up as an issue after being hired since the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. I don't think it's discriminatory.

Are any of the nurses you work with able to recommend a babysitter? Could you do phone interviews? Does your community have a Y daycare? If you are interviewing for night positions, could you interview in the evening when your husband is home? Either that or just bite the bullet and do the interview on your sleep day if it's a position that you are really interested in.

ZASHAGALKA, RN · Jul 3, 2005

sound very discriminative to me.

What do you think a job interview is? If I have 20 resumes, the interviews are to DISCRIMINATE which ones are better candidates than others.

Federal Law doesn't forbid employers from discriminating; it forbids them from discriminating for certain reasons i.e. ethnicity, nationality, age, sex, etc. I'm not intending to irk you, but not having adequate daycare isn't on the Federal list.

You WILL be discriminated against for bringing your children.

~faith,

Timothy.

Trauma Columnist · Jul 3, 2005

Maybe trade a day of day care with a co-worker. Believe me, when my kids were young and we lived overseas - daycare was a real challenge. However, maybe you could check out a new day care arrangement on the day of the job interviews and then you would be killing two birds with one stone: getting the low-down on new day care situation plus being able to interview with only the job on your mind.

estrogen · Jul 3, 2005

It may not be pc, but I would think the same thing as the previous poster. Job interviews are for making a good first impression and you don't want that first impression to be "I couldn't find anyone to look after my kids". I think the logical assumption would be that this would come up as an issue after being hired since the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. I don't think it's discriminatory.
Are any of the nurses you work with able to recommend a babysitter? Could you do phone interviews? Does your community have a Y daycare? If you are interviewing for night positions, could you interview in the evening when your husband is home? Either that or just bite the bullet and do the interview on your sleep day if it's a position that you are really interested in.

I don't currently have any friends around here that I would like to bother with watching my kids, nor do I know any reliable local teenagers that I would like to entrust my children to. My kids and I go to the local Y, but the local Y, as far as I know takes them only as long as they can page you out of a gym if your child is crying for longer than ten minutes. (However I will check into this.) If I get an extra day at Kindercare, where my eleven moth old son goes, it's 63 dollars, 25 dollars for an extra day of summer camp at the YMCAfor my daughter. 88 USD for say, every two or three interviews. Does that sound reasonable to anyone? All my colleagues on night shift have grown children or are childless, however I have been THE nurse with the LEAST absences on my unit since I've worked there. So in this case Dr. Phil's little saying about past behavior would be incorrect. Or rather, it would be correct if the potential employer looked at this fact rather than at the fact that I HAVE children and no short notice day care... I'm just trying to demostrate what I mean by discriminatory.

So I might have to either just dish out the money, or bite the bullet and go without sleep, as you suggested (not that I don't do that enough allready)... ulike all the childless people. That's how this world works, right? Us mom just allways have to bite the bullet. Thanks for all your constructive suggestions, everyone :)

gauge14iv, MSN, APRN, NP · Jul 3, 2005

Don't be offended by what othe people are saying if you didn't want to hear what you suspected people were going to say anyway.

Your question was would it be ok to take kids to a job interview - the general concensus is no - valid reasons were given. Although you may not agree with what people have said, it's the reality of the situation.

I know it's hard to work nights with kids and find time to interview, especially when you have no support system nearby. BUT employers DO expect you to put family aside for certain things, and interviews are one of them

estrogen · Jul 3, 2005

Don't be offended by what othe people are saying if you didn't want to hear what you suspected people were going to say anyway.
Your question was would it be ok to take kids to a job interview - the general concensus is no - valid reasons were given. Although you may not agree with what people have said, it's the reality of the situation.
I know it's hard to work nights with kids and find time to interview, especially when you have no support system nearby. BUT employers DO expect you to put family aside for certain things, and interviews are one of them

I agree, that they do expect you to do that. But is it right? Is it really necessary? I don't know. Interesting discussion though, don't you think?

tntrn, ASN, RN · Jul 3, 2005

I wish to parrot what others said. Taking kids to that interview will not be seen as a positive thing. Interviewers are not interested in how devoted you are to your children; they are interested in what kind of and how devoted an employee you will be. Taking your children, unless they are in their teens and can stay unseen (and unheard) in the waiting area will automatically be interpreted by the interviewers (and possibly reported to the interviewer by the reception personnel) in a negative way. They will consider you to be too disorganized to have planned for child care or too lazy to plan for child care. Neither of these may be the truth, but that won't be part of the formula they'll be using to judge your potential as their employee.

Please don't play that discrimination card against motherhood. It doesn't apply here. We get enough of that with the nursing moms who have to take "pump" breaks in the middle of busy shifts, when nobody else gets a break of any kind. Either you can find child care for the interview or you can't. If you can't, then don't schedule the interview. Also, do not assume that those here advising you against this are childless. That would not be accurate either :) In any case, good luck to you.

caroladybelle, BSN, RN · Jul 3, 2005

I don't currently have any friends around here that I would like to bother with watching my kids, nor do I know any reliable local teenagers that I would like to entrust my children to. My kids and I go to the local Y, but the local Y, as far as I know takes them only as long as they can page you out of a gym if your child is crying for longer than ten minutes. (However I will check into this.) If I get an extra day at Kindercare, where my eleven moth old son goes, it's 63 dollars, 25 dollars for an extra day of summer camp at the YMCAfor my daughter. 88 USD for say, every two or three interviews. Does that sound reasonable to anyone? All my colleagues on night shift have grown children or are childless
So I might have to either just dish out the money, or bite the bullet and go without sleep, as you suggested (not that I don't do that enough allready)... ulike all the childless people. That's how this world works, right? Us mom just allways have to bite the bullet. Thanks for all your constructive suggestions, everyone :)

You asked our opinions and we gave them to you. You do not have to like them. But if you were looking for an excuse to bring your children to job interview, you came to the wrong place.

That said, please do not lash out against the "childless people" or the ones with grown children...that is just as unfair as you see the bias towards you bringing your children to an interview. You CHOSE to have children (or at least chose to keep them), therefore it is to you to behave responsibly with regards to them. Those with "grown" children raised them, and had to find coverage for job interviews. "Childless people" have obligations such as elderly parents to care for. I can guarantee that if I took my elderly mother to a job interview, the prospective employer would wonder how I could manage my home obligations and work.

And theoretically, if you have children by birth, there was another parent that should be at least partially responsible for their care....that is not necessarily true for the single "childless" person.

"Childless People" will often be expected to work holidays more often than those with children, otherwise, we are being selfish. We have to field numerous calls from little "Bobby", "Suzy" and "Katie" and cover our coworkers when they take them. Our fellow coworkers need off at the last minute for Talent show, and solicit funds for Band Candles, and Boy Scout Projects.

And we do not have that beautiful child to come home to. Not to mention that if we are childless, it may be because we are infertile. Our hearts cry and bleed when we see a picture of your lovely children. We are happy for your joy but it makes us feel our loss each time.

Please kill the "us moms just have to bite the bullet" bit. Everybody has to bite the bullet, just a different one.