How to explain how hard you have to work in nursing school

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How can you convince your family, friends, significant others how much time and effort you have to spend to get through nursing school? How can you get them to give their support and make them understand why you can't always be available to them? What can you say? What can you show them? How can you convince them you are not just whining? Is there something your school could do or is doing to help?

Specializes in Critical Care, Emergency Medicine, Flight.

this thread makes me sad.

i wish outsiders could understand us better.

my bf doesnt understand at all... and im trying to find a way to put it in black & white for him so he gets it..

Specializes in Oncology/hematology.

just send him the link to this thread...

Specializes in International.

Honestly, they know how hard I worked based on the following...

Chronic sleep deprivation, especially around exams, and clinical paperwork.

Spending 15+ hours a week in class, with concepts, seminar, lecture, etc. Not including Skills Checkoffs practice in the practice lab. All of this makes me spend about 25 hours a week on campus just practicing.

Mood swings, and chronic stress, endless rivers of coffee, empty bottles of 5 hour Energy laying around, missing special occasion so you can " catch up on sleep."

Although I forgot to mention, my Mom is also a Nurse, so she tells every to f*** off and leave me alone.

Don't try to explain, your actions will speak for itself.

How can you convince your family, friends, significant others how much time and effort you have to spend to get through nursing school? How can you get them to give their support and make them understand why you can't always be available to them? What can you say? What can you show them? How can you convince them you are not just whining? Is there something your school could do or is doing to help?

You don't :)

I have lost a couple of really good friends through nursing school because they didn't understand why I suddenly dropped off the planet seemingly. It really hurt at first, but in the end I figured I'm friends with the ones I still have because they were supportive. It opened some doors for me, as well.. now I am applying out of state and seeing where that takes me. Sort of nice thinking of all the cool people I have met because of nursing, "more cool" to think of the people that I will meet.

For me, people who are understanding its because I put it in perspective - I go to school full time, I work full time over nights, I have a horse to take care of, two kitties to feed, a house to keep clean and occasionally I like to eat. Which requires getting groceries. Forget cooking it, I better be able to nook it!

i get pretty angry with my family when i can't ask them for support when i need it, when i've always been there for them. so we communicate about it. a lot. repeatedly. i have to be a broken record. i have to be very clear in what i need from them. for instance, i needed my stepdaughter to stop treating the house like a hotel and learn how to clean the bathroom and take that responsibility on one a week, along with doing the dishes and doing a load of towels once a week. when there is a snowstorm, she needs to come home from partying with her friends and help clear the snow off the walks around the house, since she gets the privilege of parking her car in a nicely plowed spot. and i needed my husband, who works a lot of overtime himself, to take more responsibility in following up on his daughter instead of letting me be the full-time parent, and to take more responsibility in preparing his own meals when i can't be around to fix dinner. i also resorted to things like having some groceries delivered to the house, and taking money out of the budget for other things to pay for it. they have been ****** off, tried to make me feel guilty, my husband has felt afraid he was losing me because i was "rejecting" him (by working two jobs and not making him the center of attention)....etc. etc... *sighs* i'm presenting their worst sides, really, but those are the problems in this situation. that, and me having taken on the role of being chief problem-solver and domestic servant. changing that dynamic causes a lot of discomfort all around but it DOES change over time if we stick to having good boundaries and in my opinion, really clear specific requests about our own needs and how to get them filled - not just saying "no" to theirs!

Specializes in Gerontology, nursing education.

Lately I've been on hiatus from AN because I'm working on my master's project. I'm very glad I checked this thread today.

I wanted to cry when I read the post about a student being told not to worry about his/her grades because "You're smart. You'll do well." My husband says that to me every time I take an exam and it makes me feel like he is blowing off my concerns. I know he's trying to help but it's like he's jinxing my score every time!

Last night he was wondering why I'm up until 4 AM every morning working on my project. I told him that with the tables, diagrams, references, and appendices, the paper will likely be around 60 pages. He was shocked. He said that when he was in seminary, his credo (a supported statement of faith) had a page limit of 22 pages. Not all master's programs are the same.

I remember another "friend" commenting when I was complaining about stress in a MSN program that his sister had two master's degrees. One was an MBA and the other was in accounting. He told me that he just didn't understand my stress when his sister said her graduate programs were easy peasy. angry-smiley-005.gif

With friends like that, who needs enemas? :grn: Seriously, I don't speak with this person anymore but for reasons other than his tactlessness.

Again, not to denigrate any other educational major but doggone, nursing at any level is a completely different animal than pretty much anything else. Not to say that other disciplines are easy but nursing is like a "normal" discipline on steroids.

I wanted to cry when I read the post about a student being told not to worry about his/her grades because "You're smart. You'll do well." My husband says that to me every time I take an exam and it makes me feel like he is blowing off my concerns.

That was me and that's just how I feel! It doesn't help that my sister is an RN and says she wasn't a great student and doesn't remember it being that hard. She doesn't say those as tied together, and doesn't deny the course load, but just doesn't remember studying all the time (and then there is...and I'm so smart it shouldn't be that bad for me...) Ugh.

I'd love for the people in our lives to shadow us every minute for a week. Maybe then they'll see it?

Ahh this thread came to mind today. I've been single for a while so I've really been able to just focus on school. Recently met a really nice guy, but unfortunately, he doesn't get it and I don't think things are going to work out because he wants to spend a lot more time than I am willing to share right now. I did that when we first met and saw my exam grade slip. I still passed but I know there was a direct correlation with the lowered exam grade and the amount of time I hung out with him instead of studying. I told him I need to cut back on the time we spent together and he was hurt and just did not understand. Sigh. I guess I won't be dating until I graduate next May.

Specializes in Orthopedics.

Haahahhahahahahahhaaaaa!!!!!! If I could only tell you how VERY many times I have had this EXACT argument with friends and guys I was dating!!!!!! I have in fact made people google nursing school work load and nursing school+depression just to make them understand! I get sooooo mad when someone tries to convince me that all I need to do is study for the test in med surg the night before for like "an hour." OH MY GOODNESS!!!! They have no clue. If I did that I would be sure to fail!!!!! An hour really?! Or, "you are so smart, you can do it." or "Why don't you have time for me? I mean come on. Don't you like me?" I yelled at a guy I was dating and told him, "I don't even have time for me!!!!!" He works at my gym and gives me a hard time and calls me lazy for not running this day or that because I have to study and I am like, "Dude! I am not lazy I would rather run 12 miles believe me than study!!" My friends in nursing school and I all just laugh and laugh because no one truly understands. I have a B.A. already and am currently getting my ADN. Let me tell you. It is far harder then my bachelor's could ever have dreamed of being. I decided at the start of nursing school not to date at all because I somehow knew it would be a nightmare. I was correct. Dating has caused me undue stress and turmoil during school. I am 33 and single and never been married. I want a family and children, but decided that just had to wait. Thank God I graduate in May!!!! I guess what I am trying to say here is, "I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU ARE SAYING!!!!!!!!!!"

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