How do you deal with a rude co-worker?

Published

Specializes in ED.

A fellow nurse got screamed at over the phone by an on-call MD for calling with a request for a STAT order. This particular MD is known to go on "rampages" on the nurses far too often.

The situation got us talking about how we deal with him one nurse said she bangs the phone on the desk until the yelling stops, one just hangs up and calls back, one will hang up and call any other on-call regardless of if a consult is written if necessary, one will just continue to say "Dr.__, Dr.__, Dr.__..." until he stops yelling.

Figured I'd ask here as I was curious as to how others deal with rude co-workers...

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Geriatrics.

Personally? I'd report him to either the hospital administrator or medical director. I'd probably also tell him off after he got done yelling. I'd say "Dr. X, I do not have to take your constant verbal abuse. My patient needs your medical expertise. Now, what are we going to do about his/her situation? I'm sure we can work this through" and if he continues yelling, I would call someone else, but still report his shenanigans to his supervisor.

Blessings, Michelle

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in PICU, NICU, L&D, Public Health, Hospice.

Report him. Explain to him that he does not have license to verbally abuse nurses, just to practice medicine. Continue to advocate for your patients.

I am sorry you have to deal with this...there are more nice and friendly physicians than idiots to work with...

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ED.
Personally? I'd report him to either the hospital administrator or medical director. I'd probably also tell him off after he got done yelling. I'd say "Dr. X, I do not have to take your constant verbal abuse. My patient needs your medical expertise. Now, what are we going to do about his/her situation? I'm sure we can work this through" and if he continues yelling, I would call someone else, but still report his shenanigans to his supervisor.

Blessings, Michelle

Report him. Explain to him that he does not have license to verbally abuse nurses, just to practice medicine. Continue to advocate for your patients.

I am sorry you have to deal with this...there are more nice and friendly physicians than idiots to work with...

He's been reported many, many times. As with many other rampaging MDs in my facility. The MDs are treated like Gods and the hospital wouldn't want to lose them :uhoh3:

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Med-Surg/home health/pacu/cardiac icu.

The banging the phone on the desk is pretty funny!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Cardiac, ER.

I've been known to chart.... 0215 Dr XYZ paged, returned my call 0230, informed of last three BP's 190/108, 200/124, 189/110 et increased c/o of HA,.per Dr XYZ "why are you calling me for this now? Don't you have prns for a damn HA,.I don't know why you wait until the middle of the noc,.I'm going to be there in a few hours anyway",.....will give Dr XYZ a few minutes to calm down et repage,............RN-Cardiac

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Corrections, Cardiac, Hospice.
I've been known to chart.... 0215 Dr XYZ paged, returned my call 0230, informed of last three BP's 190/108, 200/124, 189/110 et increased c/o of HA,.per Dr XYZ "why are you calling me for this now? Don't you have prns for a damn HA,.I don't know why you wait until the middle of the noc,.I'm going to be there in a few hours anyway",.....will give Dr XYZ a few minutes to calm down et repage,............RN-Cardiac

LOVE IT! Been there and done that. Got called into managers office for it and was informed I shouldn't do that. I said "He was warned I would chart word for word our conversation if he didn't stop being abusive, if he didn't want it charted, he should not have done it." Never heard another word about it!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.

If a doctor or anyone else yells, hollers, or acts socially inappropriate, demand that they stop it immediately. Have some respect for oneself.

Here's my observation...rude people will always target certain individuals, while seemingly leaving the others alone. It all comes down to their perception of us. If you are perceived as a 'softie' who will not stand up to the rude individual, you'll be targeted for further yelling, harassment, and rudeness. If you're perceived as someone who will put up a front of resistance and tolerate any disrespect or hollering, then the rude person will quickly know to leave you alone.

In other words, nurses can defend themselves by openly confronting the rude behavior as soon as it happens. If we make ourselves too difficult to pick on, the offenders will simply move on to easier targets.

Rude behavior is sometimes a crime of opportunity. These people tend to pick the most opportune targets: those who are less likely to respond in a defensive manner to the disrespect. Also, if nothing is done at the time the person is behaving rudely, the behavior will continue because he/she has been given implied permission that acting rude is acceptable.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

In any other professional setting this would be completely unacceptable. I'm a new transplant to the healthcare sector and I was aghast when I saw what people get away with in hospitals of all places. One of the good things about the military is the level of professionalism up and down the chain of command (most of the time). My only advice is to go for coffee at Borders and browse through the many books on the subject of dealing with toxic personalities and horrible bosses and coworkers. There are even nursing-specific books that treat this subject. Many of these books are a result of many years of experience from many contributors and draw from expertise in the fields of management, psychology, etc. A knee-jerk reaction might be dangerous depending on the leadership/management dynamics. Good luck to you, I've been in your spot many times and each situation was a different challenge.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I usually hang up on them and then call them back, then start the conversation with, "If you are ready to do your job, we need to talk. Otherwise my next page is going straight to the chief of Medicine because I'm sick of your sh$t and I'm not going to take such f$*king nonsense, do we understand one another?" I've never had to actually call the chief of medicine.

I like the banging of the phone, though. Louder, more annoying to the jerk, and definitely more fun from my perspective. I'm totally trying that next time.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I'd probably hang up and call back later, if it wasn't a very important order. But if it was, then you can be very sure that I WILL be heard.

As I get more mature, I realize that there are some things I just will not take anymore. Not totally proud of it, but I can be very caustic with the best of them..perhaps more.If you never speak up, you'll always get treated thus!

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I haven't slept yet after work last night, so that's my excuse for the following fantasy...

What I'd really like to do is yell back everything that they are yelling at me:

"DO YOU F-ING KNOW WHAT G/D TIME IT IS!?"

"DO *YOU* F-ING KNOW WHAT G/D TIME IT IS?!"

"WHAT THE F?!"

"WHAT THE F?!"

"STOP THAT S-T RIGHT NOW!?"

"Oh, okay, well, it was fun while it lasted. I'm taking care of a patient of yours, Ms K in with sepsis...."

I wonder how that would really turn out? Maybe if banging the phone on the desk doesn't work, I'll try the copy cat method instead.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion