How do you deal with a doctor who sweared on you over the phone?

[Blackheartednurse]

Ok I work home health care and usually I communicate with doctors via phone.Today a certain doctor swore at me (this is the first time I ever spoke with him he told me "Get your a.s.s over here and then also he said are you stupid or something.I was in shock by the way he had spoken to me.

[NocturneNrse]

..and then exclaim... "OH MY GOD, I am soooooooo STUPID!!"

[tablefor9, RN]

Have had this happen...in the middle of his tirade, he says the magic words:

"I want to speak to the charge nurse" EVIL GRIN, and I say, "I *am* the charge nurse" and go on to tell him that my father never spoke to me in such a manner, my husband does not, and my sons better not, so what would make him assume I would accept it from him? I would be happy to assist him when he could speak to me with a civil tongue in his head. And I hung up.

Sadly, and predictably, this did not end the problem. He became known for that behavior, and worse; we eventually had to have each conversation or round documented by 2 licensed personnel, went up the chain of command and he is no longer at our facility.

What you permit, you promote.

[thmpr]

This docs potty-mouth was obviously not your problem. Who knows what he was going through? I'm a big fan of separating other people's stuff from mine. I have enough of my own crap to deal with & don't need validation unless I have somehow provoked a situation. That said, I like to talk to people in private, offer some light sarcasm, & find out what's up before I go to management. Usually, if I approach someone as though they are my pt (sympathetically) they become disarmed -unless they are truly off their rocker. I once offered a doc a phone number to EAP and suggested he seek professional advice from a shrink. He got embarrassed & apologized.

If someone is truly off their rocker (ex. infantile egomaniac), don't be a victim. Document everything. Tell them they are creating a "hostile work environment" & you are not a shrink. Let them know that if they have something personal to say to you they may call your manager or your lawyer.

And as for being a translator, I won't do it if I'm not getting something out of it. I speak a little of this & that & like to help when I can because it makes pts feel more comfortable when they feel heard (which makes me happy). If it's an emergency I am more likely to help. When people get needy I stick to my boundaries: I'm happy to help when it works for me & I'm not obligated. If I have to, I remind people that I am translating for the pt & not them. I am a nurse not a translator.

[skittlebear]

Yes, this happened to me a few times. I can't help it but I just start laughing. I know it's silly, but it's the same with "road rage". If someone flips me off for driving too slow or something, I automatically laugh. I can't help it. It's bad because when I do that, it makes them even more angry, and makes me laugh even more.

Of course the doctor I was speaking with made no sense, he was just angry that I called him at night but I did have a good reason to call. This particular doctor is known for cussing the nurses that call him. I just speak politely as if he didn't say anything and focus on the subject at hand, all the while trying not to let him hear me giggle.

[BluegrassRN]

The couple of times I've had it happen, I just tell them "Why don't you call me back when you can speak like a professional?" and hang up. When they call back, though, if they say they are sorry, don't say "It's okay." Say "I appreciate your apology" and move on. Don't let them think that they can get away with it again, simply because they said they were sorry or launched into a long explanation of how stressed they were at that moment.

Recently a doc swore over the phone at one of more religiously oriented nurses. She responded something like 'HOW DARE YOU TAKE THE NAME OF OUR LORD IN VAIN!! TIME OUT FOR SASSIN'!" and slammed the phone down. She meant it, too. Usually when my docs call back, they're still fuming a bit, but more under control. When that doc called back, he was totally sheepish and embarrassed.

I think I'm going to use the "Time out for sassin'!" comment from now on!

[AtomicWoman]

My response to being sworn at would be: CLICK! :)

[AtomicWoman]

um, cursing... where is that on the SBAR sheet?

[klone, MSN, RN]

It is not your job to translate, thats what translators are for. I am not sure about all facilities but in a facility I used to work for, It was a HIPPA violation for anyone to translate anything besides a certified translator.

If she was hired as a bilingual nurse, it may indeed be part of her job to translate. It's not a HIPAA (one P, two As) violation for the nurse caring for the pt to act as interpretor. It's also not a HIPAA violation if the pt gives permission for a family member to translate (it does go against Title VI of the Civil Rights Act, though, and should be avoided).

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

you've gotten some good advice. everyone is a little different, and what worked for one person (i liked the "no way are you dr. smith, please tell dr. smith to call nurse jones about patient doe asap." approach and may try it sometime . . . if i ever get the opportunity again) may not work for another. i've had good luck with sarcasm and humor, but someone else might not be able to pull it off or might not even want to try. what you don't want to do is let that sort of behavior go because then you're just enabling it. if you keep taking it lying down, you'll get sworn at again and again. don't let that happen.

[leslie :-D]

I asked him if he kissed his mother with that mouth and hung up.

She responded something like 'HOW DARE YOU TAKE THE NAME OF OUR LORD IN VAIN!! TIME OUT FOR SASSIN'!" and slammed the phone down.

LOVING these comebacks.

leslie

[mazy]

I had a friend who had a dr. swear at her while giving an order and she wrote ever single word of it down verbatim as a T.O. and sent it right on through the system as a med order.

Did not come back well on the doc.

[RNKPCE]

I tell them that when they can talk to me as another adult, call me back and I hang up.

I will say though that in almost 20 years of nursing, this has only happened twice.

in addition since I work in a hospital I would also fill out an occurrence report.