How to Answer a Patient Who Asks: "Does God Exist?"

guest1163268 · Dec 20, 2020

3 hours ago, S.I.C. said:

I wish to unsubscribe from this forum. How to do it?

It would seem people are more courteous to their patients than to each other. I only recently joined and there appears to be relevant information to be found on this site. I appreciated your question and your responses. Thank you for posting it.

**CommunityRNBSN, BSN, RN** · Dec 20, 2020

“Oh gosh, what a tough question. I’ve thought about it a lot too. What makes you think about God right now?” Patients want to talk about their own beliefs, their own pain.

S.I.C. · Dec 20, 2020

Hi CommunityRNBSN, BSN, RN

Honestly speaking, not only one patient asked me this question; but many patients especially those with chronic and terminal illnesses, asked me the same question.

I guess patients have the right to ask any question. Unfortunately, when I brought it to this forum without any malice, to see the views of other professionals; it was not well received. It was not calling for arguments or trying to convince anyone to change his/her belief system. Some colleagues took it personally, and took it out of context to the point that I decided to leave this forum. However, since you thought about, I am trying politely and professionally to answer you. This was not about me, it was about my patients. Yes, It is really a tough question, and I guess did not provide a good answer, thus seeking a better approach from you guys.

JadedCPN, BSN, RN · Dec 20, 2020

7 minutes ago, S.I.C. said:

Hi CommunityRNBSN, BSN, RN

Honestly speaking, not only one patient asked me this question; but many patients especially those with chronic and terminal illnesses, asked me the same question.

I guess patients have the right to ask any question. Unfortunately, when I brought it to this forum without any malice, to see the views of other professionals; it was not well received. It was not calling for arguments or trying to convince anyone to change his/her belief system. Some colleagues took it personally, and took it out of context to the point that I decided to leave this forum. However, since you thought about, I am trying politely and professionally to answer you. This was not about me, it was about my patients. Yes, It is really a tough question, and I guess did not provide a good answer, thus seeking a better approach from you guys.

Your original post came across as a post whose sole intention was to stir the pot. Perhaps if you would have provided more details, such as "I just had a situation where a patient asked me if god existed; this is what I responded blah blah blah, this is why I think I did not provide a good answer, what would you guys have said or done differently" then it may have been received as an actual post looking for an actual discussion rather than just stirring the pot. Even with how you worded it, I feel most people replied with a genuine answer, even if some were sarcastic or snarky.

S.I.C. · Dec 20, 2020

Hi JadedCPN, BSN, RN

Thank you very much for your reply. I sincerely apologize for the way I structured my question! Millions of apologies.

fivestar719 · Dec 21, 2020

It is so lovely that your patient asked you this! You could also take the opportunity to refer the patient to a hospital chaplain. I don't believe God can be "proven" one way or the other - so don't worry about "proving" your belief.

You could simply say, "Yes, I believe God exists."

And maybe take some time to listen. Create a space for sharing and understanding the patients fears. It sounds like a cry for comfort and hope.

S.I.C. · Dec 21, 2020

Hi fivestar719,

I sincerely appreciate your thoughtful answer. It is just an amazing answer and a great help for me and for my patients as well. It is usually when a patient is hopeless and is a terrible or uncertain condition associated with his/her condition, that his/her mind wonders here and there...asking himself/herself many questions and then, reaches to me or to others with such kind of questions, Usually such kind of questions do not come in the mind of a happy and comfortable person who sleeps in the bed roses.

Thank you very much.

Chronic Care Coordinator · Dec 21, 2020

Great question! I would answer yes!

God cannot be caged in your 5 senses and be given as proof beyond doubt.God, is spiritual and infinite. As such, God cannot be seen, measured, weighed, or transported from one place to another.

I have had pts ask me to pray with them and tell me "I feel so much better/ I feel lighter now/ I am more hopeful now. Thank you, I wish more Doc/nurses would pray with their patients."

I still go by WHO's definition of Health as "A state of physical, mental,social (used to be spiritual) sense of wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease and infirmity". I come from a culture where spiritual health is very important and is cultivated alongside physical health. I have never pushed my beliefs on patients but am open to their questions and answer them honestly.

In my personal life, I have felt God's presence and have enjoyed his grace.My God is not a Santa Claus God, mild mannered and a pushover but a God who tempers his Mercy with Justice. As a Catholic, I see my saviour never had it made-living by the sweat of his brow,as a carpenter, knowing poverty, touched by evil-being falsely accused,whipped,carrying his cross to his death. This is not because God made a choice but because MAN used his free will to choose good or evil.Life is a struggle and it was never meant to be a joyride through out life.

I ask patients what their worries are, what they can do about it and how they feel that they can let go and trust God to give them wisdom,courage,patience and perseverance to get through each day.Many of them them remember their spiritual upbringing as a child and learn to go back to basics.

I respect each person's view in this discussion and hope you find what is meaningful to you in this life! I am not looking to "prove" His existence but know that He loves me enough not to force me into believing his existence. He just makes me aware of his presence when I look around and see his presence and light in ordinary people going above and beyond to help others.

OP! My answer is YES! 100% God is real, alive and guides me as I muddle through my life always guiding my path joy and grief daily! That's what I tell my patients when asked. Peace to all!

S.I.C. · Dec 21, 2020

Hi spontangel,

What a powerful testimony!

Thank you very for such a message! It is not going only to help my patients; it will also help me in my professional and personal life. It is a greatest Christmas and New Year gift I receive. I am touched and inspired to feel the presence of God not only in bad times such as we face COVID-19 pandemic, but also in good times as we celebrate Christmas and New Year through His protection and guidance. I just feel speechless because I did not expect to read such great testimony, but in respect thank you so much. I sincerely thank you for being brave to express your beliefs with confidence, and without fear. Thanks also to fivestar719 for answer. I now know and have the best approach I can use in helping my patients, as far as spiritual care is concerned. Peace be with you!!

Chronic Care Coordinator · Dec 22, 2020

You are welcome!

I think, as nurses we should be prepared for questions like this in these Covid Times when lives are being lost at unprecedented rates. It's not just the dying but their families, friends and loved ones that come to people they trust for answers. In the clinic, I don't have the luxury of a chaplain, priest,Imam,poojari etc. So I tend to ask them if they belong to any particular faith and direct them to their religious heads for in depth guidance.

I do see a lot of people with unresolved issues,depression anger,trauma that need sometimes just a listening ear, or sometimes someone to hold hands, pray and even cry out on their behalf. Sometimes, I just pray silently for them while taking care of them! I also make sure to refer them to our social worker for a comprehensive evaluation as long as they are not suicidal or homicidal. Those are an automatic 911 call and security call within the clinic.

If you are not sure what to say, Just be honest and tell them "I don't know what to tell you but is there someone in your social circle that you feel comfortable asking this question? " I feel we need to give holistic care at the patient's level of comfort, with the patient's agreement and based on our assessment of patient needs. All luck navigating these relevant questions in these socially charged times! Let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me!

S.I.C. · Dec 22, 2020

Millions of thanks.

This was indeed a great day for me and for my clients. Thank you very much again for generously sharing part of your knowledge and experiences. You may not understand the extent to which this has helped me, even through my own struggles.

Some of our patients, even sometimes us, carry day by day some burdens to the point that our minds wander everywhere and we ask ourselves many questions! Few statements of comforts, attentive listening, showing empathy, or even just showing to the hopeless, traumatized, and angry person that we care, can make a great difference.

In my opinion, confidence is very important in nursing profession, but attitude toward our patients contributes as well to quality nursing care. I got the answer I was looking for from the very beginning, and now it is only time to say again: "Thank you very much".

Advanced Merry Christmas and Happy New Year 2021 to all nurses and their family members; and to our patients and their family members!

Guest856929 · Dec 22, 2020

The patient specifically asked the OP about God, not religion. Why would he/she direct the patient to a religious person I.e pastor, chaplain etc. Why make the assumption that the patient was interested in speaking to a different entity? Maybe the patient found the nurse to quite insightful and just wanted to engage 1:1 on a philosophical matter.