I will never forget the day I first screwed up the courage to say those words in front of a roomful of fellow AA members. I'd only been going to meetings for a few weeks, but it hadn't taken long for me to realize that I wasn't a problem drinker, I had a drinking problem. (Only those who have fought this battle---or lived with an alcoholic---know the difference.)
Up until that day, now sixteen years in the past, I'd thought I was in control of my drinking; after all, I didn't get drunk every time, and oftentimes I'd go as long as a year between binges. But there were also entire periods of my 20s and early 30s that I didn't even remember because I spent weeks and months inside a bottle. I had blackouts. I picked fights with my husband and treated him like dirt. I hid myself away from my children. And I did awful, embarrassing things that I never would have even THOUGHT of when sober.
And I'd thought I was in control...........:icon_roll
But as ashamed as I was to admit that I was one of 'those' people---the ones my parents (your basic upper-class lushes themselves) looked down their noses at because "they drink"---it turned out to be the most liberating act of my life. Suddenly I was free.......to explore who I was without the mask, to learn what I wanted to be when I grew up. At age 33, I had no idea of who I was; I'd started drinking at only 13 and was a full-fledged alcoholic by the age of 19, so I was still very immature emotionally. But every good thing that has happened in my life since I accepted my own powerlessness over alcohol, happened because of my sobriety. I would be nowhere without it, let alone without God, Who continues to make it possible every day. It's as simple---and as complicated---as that.
Thanks for sharing. Please do not become complacent. There are many people who can benefit from your continued sobriety. Both in and out of the program. Be good to yourself.
Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.
Thanks for sharing. Please do not become complacent. There are many people who can benefit from your continued sobriety. Both in and out of the program. Be good to yourself.
I agree 100%---complacency is the addict's worst enemy. Even though I've been sober for so many years, I know that I'm only one sip of booze away from complete disaster.......I'm STILL afraid of that.
What do you do when you are the adult child of a 60 yr old alcoholic, who is ill?
Wee background, my Dad, (still the greatest man I ever knew!), well, he has a battle with the booze. Right now, he's been ill for more than a month, cant keep food down, cant even drink a cup of tea without vomiting. I made him see the doc, who gave him meds for reflux and Stematil, to stop the nausea. He's not eating, just noticed he has a shake in his right leg, and he looks about 80 yrs old.
So, between my mam being ill, and I'm her carer, (she and my Daddy divorced years ago...funilly enough..cause of his drinking!), and tryin to look after him a bit, I just looked back at the cash he has asked me to get from the bank for him, it totals £600 in just over five weeks. So, if he cant keep food down, what is he spending that amount of cash on? I need to ask him, but so dont want to dis-respect my Father. What can I do?
I think he's spending the money on Vodka, must be at least a litre per day, to spend that amount of cash! Anyone been in this situation?? Btw...My Dad does NOT have a problem, according to him
Danissa, Please find an Al-Anon meeting and get some help. Your father's disease can't help but affect you and there is help available for you even if he insists he doesn't need help because he "doesn't have a problem". One of the major symptoms of alcoholism is denial. You can't help him if he doesn't want help but you can help yourself!
I admire your ability to realize your addiction and change your life. I admire your honesty for admitting how you treated your family. Both of my parents are alcoholics and they dont realize the impact on my siblings and I.
VivaLasViejas, ASN, RN
22 Articles; 9,996 Posts
Works for me!