I have been doing fine on the academic side but just got a letter that they are concerned about my ability to meet technical standards of behavioural emotional communication. They say I get things wrong.
Mainly they think I had been nitpicking when they mark my answers wrong when I can prove they are right. I tend to be a perfectionist and really get upset when I am treated unfairly.
Can they dismiss you for not being able to meet these "professional qualities" of sucking it up when I'm treated unfairly? I see my intensity is creeping them out. Obviously, I will try to lay low now. But I suspect there will be a second warning letter coming from a fourth teacher, so am I in danger?
How many warnings before they can kick me out? Has anyone had these?
short and sweet, what you are telling the OP is to suck it up and shut up, yes?
I feel bad that everyone is leaving you hanging...so here goes,
Short answer: yes, but not in the ways you're probably thinking.
I'm going to be completely honest with you, you sound like a nightmare for a professor. Before you get defensive about that, let me first tell you that I can only say that statement with such confidence because there was a time in my nursing school career where I could arguably have been accused of the same stunts....
Even the way you explain your side of the crisis makes you sound like you're not even genuinely acknowledging your role in this issue, you are kinda trying to take the route of a victim, but I get it, you're probably scared...
While I can't speak for certain because I do not know where you are going to school and institutional standards vary from place to place, I do know that prior to entering in the program, you in some way were prompted to "agree to the terms and conditions" of the program. Kinda like a student handbook you know? In other words, just by paying the tuition, probably, you were thereby agreeing to their terms and conditions, which include expectations of behavior. Realistically, the chances of them actually pursuing this potential "void of contract" in an effort to expel you is actually really slim. Just the legalities of such an event would be a mess, and with the way you have portrayed your "tenacity", you'd be just the person to probably make it a nightmare for them to proceed...but I'm getting side tracked.
Every clinical and course you take in school will have a syllabus that outlines course objectives that have to be met in order to pass the class, and I'd be willing to bet that every course syllabus a nursing student has ever had has included an objective r/t "professionalism"...guess what? Your attitude toward the aforementioned "professional qualities" with descriptions like "..of sucking it up" indicate an alarmingly apparent failure to meet the objective...which could cost you your right to pass the course...failing courses leads to being terminated from the program.
Deep breath, you've only received a warning...which means you're in the hot seat, but they're giving you a chance to shape up. USE THIS CHANCE THEY'VE GIVEN YOU TO ACTUALLY SHAPE UP AND CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE.
So here's a few suggestions:
1. You need to start SERIOUSLY choosing your battles, because not all battles are worth it, regardless of if you're actually the victim or not. You absolutely can NOT raise a fuss over every single scenario that MIGHT have questionable "fairness" qualities. Life isn't fair, and your nursing career won't be fair 100% of the time either. Deal with it. Raising hell over every issue of fairness (as determined by you) is seriously unprofessional. That's basically equivalent to adult-toddler tantrums, no boss wants to hire or deal with an adult-toddler.
2. Kind of related to the first suggestion, but start taking constructive criticism! It will help you! I promise! You kinda sound like you get defensive when you're evaluated and you really have to put a stop to that. Take evaluations for what they are, and opportunity to hear from an observing party about your strengths and weaknesses...don't fight their perception of your weaknesses...just listen, and develop a plan to either better yourself, or better represent that perceived "weakness" if you believe the observer was actually wrong (which will sometimes happen)...it simply just means you have to present the quality in a different way as to not be misinterpreted.
I feel bad that everyone is leaving you hanging...so here goes, Short answer: yes, but not in the ways you're probably thinking. I'm going to be completely honest with you, you sound like a nightmare for a professor. Before you get defensive about that, let me first tell you that I can only say that statement with such confidence because there was a time in my nursing school career where I could arguably have been accused of the same stunts....
Even the way you explain your side of the crisis makes you sound like you're not even genuinely acknowledging your role in this issue, you are kinda trying to take the route of a victim, but I get it, you're probably scared...
While I can't speak for certain because I do not know where you are going to school and institutional standards vary from place to place, I do know that prior to entering in the program, you in some way were prompted to "agree to the terms and conditions" of the program. Kinda like a student handbook you know? In other words, just by paying the tuition, probably, you were thereby agreeing to their terms and conditions, which include expectations of behavior.
Realistically, the chances of them actually pursuing this potential "void of contract" in an effort to expel you is actually really slim. Just the legalities of such an event would be a mess, and with the way you have portrayed your "tenacity", you'd be just the person to probably make it a nightmare for them to proceed...but I'm getting side tracked. Every clinical and course you take in school will have a syllabus that outlines course objectives that have to be met in order to pass the class, and I'd be willing to bet that every course syllabus a nursing student has ever had has included an objective r/t "professionalism"...guess what? Your attitude toward the aforementioned "professional qualities" with descriptions like "..of sucking it up" indicate an alarmingly apparent failure to meet the objective...which could cost you your right to pass the course...failing courses leads to being terminated from the program.
Deep breath, you've only received a warning...which means you're in the hot seat, but they're giving you a chance to shape up. USE THIS CHANCE THEY'VE GIVEN YOU TO ACTUALLY SHAPE UP AND CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE. So here's a few suggestions:
1. You need to start SERIOUSLY choosing your battles, because not all battles are worth it, regardless of if you're actually the victim or not. You absolutely can NOT raise a fuss over every single scenario that MIGHT have questionable "fairness" qualities. Life isn't fair, and your nursing career won't be fair 100% of the time either. Deal with it. Raising hell over every issue of fairness (as determined by you) is seriously unprofessional. That's basically equivalent to adult-toddler tantrums, no boss wants to hire or deal with an adult-toddler.
2. Kind of related to the first suggestion, but start taking constructive criticism! It will help you! I promise! You kinda sound like you get defensive when you're evaluated and you really have to put a stop to that. Take evaluations for what they are, and opportunity to hear from an observing party about your strengths and weaknesses...don't fight their perception of your weaknesses...just listen, and develop a plan to either better yourself, or better represent that perceived "weakness" if you believe the observer was actually wrong (which will sometimes happen)...it simply just means you have to present the quality in a different way as to not be misinterpreted.
Best sage advice.
Like other posters alluded to, you need to sit down and speak to your program director about your warnings; I suggest you create an action plan and stick to it.
I'm not sure about your own personality quirks, because we were not there, but I agree with another poster who said to seek out EAP or school counseling to find ways to have those "quirks" to your personality applied appropriately at the right time; they are obviously affecting you in school, and they can affect you professionally; nursing school is your base in training for the nursing professional world and culture.
In so many words people are saying to "suck it up"; HOWEVER the REALITY is HOW you are going to appropriately engage professionally in a realm where there so much GRAY? Nothing is black and white in life either...how do you approach life when it's not fair? Is it healthy on unhealthy? How do you deal with setbacks? What is your resiliency? I don't need the answer....I am sure you have those answers or you may have not, I don't know that either...either way, you must have a healthy handle on dealing with issues and situations where you may not end up being "correct"; I suggest to start working on this ASAP for your own personal success.
Specializes in psych, addictions, hospice, education.
What is the behavioral emotional communication standard you're violating, according to your student handbook and university policy? Details! I need details. It's difficult to determine our opinion on whether you violated it, or not, if we don't know what the standard and policy are.
The letter says they're concerned. That doesn't mean you'll fail. It means they're concerned and hope you'll fix whatever they're concerned about.
Since 4 instructors have expressed concern and you've gotten two reports about it, it really is time to examine yourself, and see what you might need to change. Nursing is full of situations where things won't go the way you think they should. Now is the time to change yourself, so you can be the best you can be, and also so you don't feel the extreme stress you're feeling now, as you go forward.
I have been doing fine on the academic side but just got a letter that they are concerned about my ability to meet technical standards of behavioural emotional communication. They say I get things wrong and annoy them.
Mainly they think I had been nitpicking when they mark my answers wrong when I can prove they are right. I tend to be a perfectionist and really get upset when I am treated unfairly.
Can they dismiss you for not being able to meet these "professional qualities" of sucking it up when you get treated unfairly? I see my perfectionism is creeping them out. Obviously, I will try to lay low now. But there will be a second warning letter coming from a fourth teacher, so am I in danger?
How many of these warnings before they can kick me out? Has anyone had these?
Thanks both yes, I will lay low now. But - are two warning letters involving 4 teachers enough to get me kicked out anyway? I thought that you had to fail classes.[/quote']
Specializes in Complex pedi to LTC/SA & now a manager.
Insubordination and behavior/attitude can be grounds for dismissal. Not just academic or clinical failure. Consistently arguing with instructors can fall under insubordination hence why the written warning.
Look at this as an opportunity to grow and learn and be thankful that your school thinks enough of you to give you a warning and an opportunity for corrective action on your part. Try to be open and not defensive to see what you need to do/say/ act to improve to be successful and graduate.
Remember in nursing there aren't always absolute right and wrong hence the critical thinking and applied knowledge component. Even the NCLEX is about choosing the best answer from several that may also be correct at face value.
check your syllabus. almost guarantee the answer will be in there. most programs ive seen, have a section thats up to instructors discretion regarding professionalism, inside and outside the classroom. The outside usually referred to clinical sites, but also i learned that this meant pretty much anytime you were in uniform, even on lunch or in any public setting where you can be identified.
i agree with most of the other posts here. I barely ever fought test questions unless i could pick it up out of the book word for word and say "this is the correct answer as per our textbook". if there was any room for a question to be left up to interpretation i wouldn't even bother. Id throw in my 2 cents and if it wasn't enough to get them to consider my point of view, id leave it be for 2 reasons:
1. The more agreeable you are with your instructors--the keepers of your final grade and the deciding factor of your fate in the program-- the more theyll be willing to help you out when you really need it. Sure, you can fight for an extra 2 points on your test and become public enemy number one, ORRRR you can be the quiet little angel that never had any problems with anyone, that they will remember say, when youre on the brink of an 89.8. Thats usually when people start to really reconsider their choices earlier on
2. The more you scream, the less youre heard. If youre the nitpicky type when it comes to questions, they will be less inclined to even want to hear you out because youre already pegged as the trouble maker. Not to mention, once again, when it comes time for practicums, they can reserve the right to be equally as nitpicky about the things you do. I heard an instructor once remove points under the "tester discretion" session because although the student did the scenario correctly, the student didnt sound "confident in her decisions" and there wasn't a good "flow from one intervention to the next" and that docked her a couple points.
At this point, 2 letters from 4 teachers sounds pretty fargone. But i suppose if you do enough groveling and promises to improve your behavior, you could fall into good graces and keep your place in the program. The last thing you want is a reputation before youve made it out of school. Word travels quickly in this field.
.......... "The last thing you want is a reputation before youve made it out of school. Word travels quickly in this field."
OP, it sounds like the faculty has some concerns about your social interaction skills. So, don't take this lightly and do visit the school's free counseling center as many have already suggested.
We don't have all the details. Are you screaming, and making them feel threatened, or are you crying uncontrollably, for instance?
Whatever you do, don't share the fact that you received two warning letters and the faculty's concerns with any, ANY of your fellow classmates. If you tell one person, 50 people will hear about it.
Nurses have to demonstrate that we can work on teams. There are lots of graded group projects or learning activities in nursing school. At clinicals, you have to get along with staff at all levels... from environmental services to MDs.
Not trying to be hard on you, I'm an only child, and I sometimes have to work harder on my communication skills.
Like other people have said, nitpicking and/or arguing with the professor gets you nowhere. When you are attempting to argue a question can you prove that the question was unfair or incorrect with the textbook your professor utilizes? The only way that I have ever gotten a question removed was when I backed it up with the book or it contradicted the notes my professors hand-out. To be honest, it is rare that the professors are wrong. My professors use a test bank and the test questions are formulated by professionals who are capable of writing the test questions. How often are you arguing questions? Are there multiple questions you have an issue with? Is it for every test? Are other students getting the questions wrong, too? Usually I have noticed when some of my classmates complain that the questions were unfair they simply were not able to think critically and/or apply their knowledge. It is not easy for everyone to do. If you teacher explains the rationale for the question then there is no point in arguing unless the notes or the books completely contradict the answer that was on the test. If I were you I would definitely lay low (like you said) and only bring up questions that you can absolutely 100% prove wrong.
Making a habit of arguing/debating grades with your teachers will make you a target. I had a classmate that did this and she was bounced from the program.
A lot of nursing instructors seem to have a "god-complex". They will fail at the drop of a hat if you tick them off. Lay low. Get over it and move on. In their defense, they're probably pretty busy and having someone nit-pick everything is probably pretty annoying.
DidiRN
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