Help with board complaint

Crush · Mar 29, 2018

I had never heard of the Alienation of Affection thing. Then maybe this might be something the BON in your state may look into. Glad you are following up with a lawyer. If nothing else, the consultation is well worth it for peace of mind.

FrenchieB1986 · Mar 29, 2018

What is Dr Fever, Davey Do?

TriciaJ, RN · Mar 29, 2018

I had never heard of the Alienation of Affection thing. Then maybe this might be something the BON in your state may look into. Glad you are following up with a lawyer. If nothing else, the consultation is well worth it for peace of mind.

Alienation of affection is an archaic law, designed to punish the evil Other Woman for causing an otherwise loyal but weak-willed husband to stray. I can't believe anyone still has it on the books. Of course, I'm on the west coast where the divorces are no-fault.

Editorial Team / Admin · Mar 29, 2018

That's the Alienation of Affection lawsuit I was talking about. Only 9 or 10 states permit them--not sure if MS is one of them. And yes, people do file such suits.

Yes, MS is one of the 7 states that allow these lawsuits. The other 6 are HI, IL, NM, NC, SD, UT.

Been there,done that, ASN, RN · Mar 29, 2018

We met at work, I am a "float nurse" and I was assigned in his unit several times. After some of the doctors became aware that we were seeing each other, I was no longer assigned in the unit he worked in. We did not neglect patients to "go have sex" but we did stay and work over on a few occasions when we did not have to. He moved in with me a few months ago and in MS it is technically illegal to "cohabitate" with a married man or woman if you are not their spouse, so that is the main reason I worry the BON would actually investigate. I have not received a notice from them this far but I don't know when his wife supposedly made the complaint and how long it would take the BON to contact me if they actually did investigate?

Doubt it was the docs that noticed, however somebody did. Your behavior was obviously not discreet.

I was working as a staff nurse, my husband started working agency there, I would not even kiss him on the cheek. NO public display of affection while on duty.

Only your BON knows when , and if they will investigate.

Best of luck with this mess.

Meriwhen, ASN, BSN, MSN, RN · Mar 29, 2018

Alienation of affection is an archaic law, designed to punish the evil Other Woman for causing an otherwise loyal but weak-willed husband to stray. I can't believe anyone still has it on the books. Of course, I'm on the west coast where the divorces are no-fault.

It's also not limited to women; men can be the recipient of an AoA suit as well.

kbrn2002, ADN, RN · Mar 29, 2018

What is Dr Fever, Davey Do?

He's a regular poster around here. You'll run into some of his wonderful artwork eventually.

As for your situation, my initial reaction was no way does the BON care who you are involved with as long as it isn't a drug kingpin or a serial killer. But then, every state has different rules and regulations and I really have no clue if your state is one that likes to regulate your life off the job as well as while you are at work. If your state's BON is a super conservative agency, then I suppose anything is possible.

ProperlySeasoned · Mar 30, 2018

I have posted about this before, but the advice still stands. I am married to a physician. When he was in medical school or residency (I honestly can't remember which), a member from the medical board spoke to their group. They explained that the board receives many, many call from spouses, exes, lovers etc raking docs over the coals. Everything from "he goes to the hospital drunk," to "he talks about all her patient's at dinner parties, by name." The board stated that all of this is fodder for divorce attorneys, but the board does not consider ANY of it. While this anecdote is not about the BON, I can't imagine them being any different.

Leader25, ASN, BSN, RN · Mar 30, 2018

[COLOR=#000000]"I realize dating someone who is still married is not the best thing, "[/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000]ya think?!![/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000]My dear,you have bigger problems than the BON sanctioning you for moral turpitude.

His WIFE must be very hurt and angry at your "affair" ,the moving in together and what not, to have taken it this far. There is no telling what she will do next.

This will not end well for you.Karma is a *****.

You did not ask for relationship advice,you are a grown woman but those were my three cents anyway.[/COLOR]

allnurses Guide · Mar 30, 2018

What is Dr Fever, Davey Do?

Ask Dr. Fever is a thread where anyone can ask Dr. Fever for advice. If you are old enough to remember the television show WKRP in Cincinnati you'll know who DR. Johnny Fever is.

Hppy

Ruby Vee, BSN · Mar 30, 2018

Sounds like a whole lot of nothing to me. It's got to be a slow week at the BON if they don't laugh at this outright. Did she report her own husband's ass to the BON? He's the one who technically cheated on her. I can't imagine anyone taking this crap seriously. A vindictive ex-wife. How novel.
I'm glad you have an appointment with a lawyer. Hopefully this all gets laid to rest and you can breathe more easily.

Sounds like she isn't an ex-wife; sounds like she's still a wife. While the boyfriend is the one who technically cheated, the OP doesn't win any points for either good judgement or integrity. I can see how the Board of Nursing could frown upon lapses in judgement and lock of integrity. I would think the boyfriend would have some worries there, too.

OrganizedChaos, LVN · Mar 30, 2018

All I can say is if he cheated on her with you, he will cheat on you with someone else.

I highly doubt the BON will care that your boyfriend was cheating on his wife with you, unless it led to patient harm. It sounds like you have everything under control though.