I've been working at my current job for almost 3 months. Just a few week off orientation working independently.
Last night I worked with 2 other nurses. One happened to be another new nurse. The nurse that had been there longer had the nastiest attitude I've ever seen. From the moment she saw the assignment posted on the board you could just tell she was upset. I'm not sure why, maybe because she would be working with the two newest nurses? She complained, rolled her eyes, made us feel like she didn't want us to be working with her, made it clear that a certain area was hers, very unhelpful as well. It was completely unprofessional.
I notified the nurse manager. Apparently they are good friends, so that wasn't very helpful with the plan that the two of them had come up with. So I sent an email to someone one step higher than my nurse manager. We'll find out today if anything has changed. Apparently this wasn't the first time that this has been an issue with this nurse. Almost makes me feel like I found the wrong job because of this one employee. Advice? Opinions? Similar situations? Please share, thank you.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
Welcome to the "mean girls club!"... They are everywhere you will work in nursing. Do your job, be nice to everyone no matter what. Jump in and help other RNs without being asked. If you are new to a job bring food your first week. You are fitting into their territory you do not want enemies. Life isn't fair, accept it get over yourself. If you are thin, pretty and smart you are a triple threat. They want to hate you, give them every reason not to. Blunt but true. Be humble.
"Mean Girls"? What is this, high school?
Nurses are human, not endless, angelic fonts of compassion and kindness. Like other humans, we have our bad days, our bad months and and our bad years. Sometimes we meet people who set our teeth on edge, whom we dislike on sight or for good cause, and with whom we have difficulty in communicating. Nurses and nursing are not unique in this respect. But I don't see anyone touting the same expectations for truck drivers or CPAs.
Attributing all communication difficulties to "mean girls" is to say that you are unable or unwilling to even attempt to work with and get along with half of the world's population. (Because women are just like that -- or so you say.). Not only is that a misogynistic statement; it will not serve you or anyone well when they are out of school and attempting to get along in the work world. Dismissing half the world's population as inherently defective in communication means you don't even have to try -- just shrug it off as "mean girls."
Your thin, pretty, smart comment implies that failures to communicate effectively with colleagues can be attributed directly to jealousy and not to the poster's communication style, manner or behavior. That's a crock. Your mother may have told you that the reason your schoolmates were nasty to you was because they were jealous; that's what mothers say. In the real world, it's more likely that your introversion makes you appear stuck-up, that your brusqueness or directness makes you appear "mean" or that or. "Specialness" makes you appear entitled. If you adjust your behavior (and notice I said YOUR behavior, because while you can control your behavior, you cannot control anyone else's), you may have better luck getting along with others.
And if you actually TALK to someone before "reporting" them, it might serve you even better.
I hope you grow up. I hope the OP comes back and is able to see and think about the advice given here. It would benefit her.
Bullies are by no means tolerated. This is lateral violence! If the manager you reported this to does nothing about it then go up the chain of command. Make a big fuss and say you feel threatened. Bullying is not tolerated anymore. You folks here are insane! I have worked in a hospital 18 years and the people that were bullies always ended up out the door. Report them to corporate compliance and if that still doesn't work then they don't deserve a great nurse like you.
Just reading some of the comments on here are making me feel hostile. I think I will separate myself from this environment!
If strangers opinions on the internet distress you so much to the point you need to announce your separation from such, the Internet, is not for you. Lighten up, this is a great place if you don't take life so seriously. As nurses, we deal with too much seriousness everyday, it's awesome we have a place to come together and let go.
Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
Welcome to the "mean girls club!"... They are everywhere you will work in nursing. Do your job, be nice to everyone no matter what. Jump in and help other RNs without being asked. If you are new to a job bring food your first week. You are fitting into their territory you do not want enemies. Life isn't fair, accept it get over yourself. If you are thin, pretty and smart you are a triple threat. They want to hate you, give them every reason not to. Blunt but true. Be humble.
Yeah, not so much. I couldn't give three flips what my co-workers look like. They may be younger, thinner, and prettier, but I'll take older, wiser, and more experienced every day.
I've worked several places over the years, and I have never worked anywhere where people wanted to hate me. If that's your experience, perhaps you need to examine yourself, not your co-workers.
Welcome to the "mean girls club!"... They are everywhere you will work in nursing. Do your job, be nice to everyone no matter what. Jump in and help other RNs without being asked. If you are new to a job bring food your first week. You are fitting into their territory you do not want enemies. Life isn't fair, accept it get over yourself. If you are thin, pretty and smart you are a triple threat. They want to hate you, give them every reason not to. Blunt but true. Be humble.
Please don't tell me that you think your coworkers dislike you because you're pretty.
Welcome to the "mean girls club!"... They are everywhere you will work in nursing. Do your job, be nice to everyone no matter what. Jump in and help other RNs without being asked. If you are new to a job bring food your first week. You are fitting into their territory you do not want enemies. Life isn't fair, accept it get over yourself. If you are thin, pretty and smart you are a triple threat. They want to hate you, give them every reason not to. Blunt but true. Be humble.
To be perfectly blunt, no, your post is not "the" truth, it is merely one opinion among many. Including mine.
This is your truth, and this is how your mind thinks.
You will not find a conflict-management course out there (that is worth anything) that will instruct someone to simply ignore the person with whom you have an issue with, and instead, go above the managers head. The exception would be threat of violence.
Nursing is NOT a "mean girls club". What an insult to all of the men in nursing. Even THAT is not absolute, because there are probably men in nursing who may have your beliefs as well ~ but that still doesn't make them a fact. Therefore, you cannot extrapolate your reality unto all of nursing.
There is a general regard to the social mores of the Microsystem that is helpful for a new employee to be cognizant of when they first begin to work in an area.
Lastly, beauty is in the eye of the beholder......what floats one person's boat, may not do anything for another. Being thin, pretty, and smart may be what does it for you, but not everyone.
I believe you have to validate your perceptions directly with the nurse in question. Breaking the chain-of-commands, can be a costly mistake and easily back fire.
Give the first opportunity to parties involved.
If you are a new nurse, please take some class on conflict management, interpersonal relationship, and professional ethics.
If you come into work, see your assignment on the board and begin sighing/rolling eyes/complaining and that becomes a reportable offense then every nurse on my floor is in trouble because that's a nightly occurrence.
Ruby Vee, BSN
17 Articles; 14,051 Posts
"Mean Girls"? What is this, high school?
Nurses are human, not endless, angelic fonts of compassion and kindness. Like other humans, we have our bad days, our bad months and and our bad years. Sometimes we meet people who set our teeth on edge, whom we dislike on sight or for good cause, and with whom we have difficulty in communicating. Nurses and nursing are not unique in this respect. But I don't see anyone touting the same expectations for truck drivers or CPAs.
Attributing all communication difficulties to "mean girls" is to say that you are unable or unwilling to even attempt to work with and get along with half of the world's population. (Because women are just like that -- or so you say.). Not only is that a misogynistic statement; it will not serve you or anyone well when they are out of school and attempting to get along in the work world. Dismissing half the world's population as inherently defective in communication means you don't even have to try -- just shrug it off as "mean girls."
Your thin, pretty, smart comment implies that failures to communicate effectively with colleagues can be attributed directly to jealousy and not to the poster's communication style, manner or behavior. That's a crock. Your mother may have told you that the reason your schoolmates were nasty to you was because they were jealous; that's what mothers say. In the real world, it's more likely that your introversion makes you appear stuck-up, that your brusqueness or directness makes you appear "mean" or that or. "Specialness" makes you appear entitled. If you adjust your behavior (and notice I said YOUR behavior, because while you can control your behavior, you cannot control anyone else's), you may have better luck getting along with others.
And if you actually TALK to someone before "reporting" them, it might serve you even better.
I hope you grow up. I hope the OP comes back and is able to see and think about the advice given here. It would benefit her.