got deleted on another site

Published

I post on another site occasionally. It is strickly a support site for children are caring for elderly family members , NOT medical in anyway. So one person did a thread about MIL who is in late 70s and is experiencing falls and obnoxious behavior. The person wrote at length about the behaviors and mentioned sort of incidentally that the MIL frequently had a few drinks when this happened. I went into nurse mode and said "have you ever considered the possiblity that your MIL might be an alcohol, it is more common than you think". The poster also said they had taken the MIL to doctor more than once and the doctor could not find anything wrong with her. I mentioned that they need to take note about how much alcohol was actually consumed and go back to the doctor and tell the doctor about it. My post was deleted as inappropriate. :uhoh21: I guess I forgot where I was, here those remarks would not even raise an eyebrow.

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Specializes in Education, FP, LNC, Forensics, ED, OB.

What was their rationale??

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Specializes in Neuro ICU and Med Surg.

I probably would have said the same thing.

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What was their rationale??
Don't know, just said "deleted as inappropriate". I don't know if the poster saw it and complained or if the moderater thought it was inappropriate. I hope the poster saw it, they needed someone to put a bee in their bonnett. Just about any nurse would have read what I read posted and wondered how much alcohol was being consumed. But this is one of those sites that consist mostly of vitural patting of the hand and saying "there, there". The most advice anyone ever gives is to say, "take granny to the doctor". I should have probably kept my nursing diagnosis to myself. It just activated memories of the sweet little ole grandparents that went into DTs after two or three days in the hospital. No one mentioned the drinking or the xanax because they did not know about it or think it was significant.
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Specializes in ICU, Telemetry.

Sounds like another family sailing with Cleopatra down "de nile...."

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Specializes in Family Nurse Practitioner.

Wow, what a shame. I didn't have to go to nursing school to consider there might be a problem with alcohol given the facts of that story. :rolleyes:

Hopefully you planted a seed and in the future it will help them.

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It is OK. I once posted there about something that happened between me and my mom. We were going out and she could not remember how to lock her door. I got irritated and said, "I can't believe you forgot how to lock you door, you have been locking the same door for 30 years". She just looked at me like what I said made her very sad. I immediately felt terrible and apologized. I told that story on that site and everyone was very accepting of it. The said that the strain of caring for a elderly person over the years will make you slip like that sometimes. It made me feel a lot better. Imagine how I would have felt if someone had said something unsupportive.

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Specializes in ED, ICU, Heme/Onc.

It is a shame that your comment got deleted, but please don't think that your comment was unsupportive simply because the moderators didn't agree with you. IMHO, you were appropriately forthright, and it didn't sound like you were being judgmental, just providing information. Sometimes it doesn't come across as warm and fuzzy as we'd like it to, and no one wants to hear that a loved one might possibly be addicted to anything with all of the negative connotations that go along with it.

But I recall from nursing school that a person over the age of 65 having one drink a day could be considered an alcoholic. That sounds extreme, but it has to do with how the liver functions after a certain age, and not a social commentary about a person's habits. Sometimes I forget how lay people can get really bent about stuff that we really don't think is offensive, gross, or anything that needs to be made a big deal out of.

I'm sorry that you felt alienated by a community where you have received and given support - that stinks.

Blee

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Specializes in ER, PACU, Med-Surg, Hospice, LTC.

I've learned that some people are offended by just about everything and report posts to moderators non-stop. I know for a fact that this happens on another site that I belong to.

I personally think that some posts are deleted just to get the super-sensitive people to clam-up....rather than have WWIII break-out over a post.

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Specializes in LTC, Med/Surg, Peds, ICU, Tele.

Every internet site has its own biases I've noticed. It sounds like you uncovered one of theirs. You'll have to avoid that subject from now on there.

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I've learned that some people are offended by just about everything and report posts to moderators non-stop. I know for a fact that this happens on another site that I belong to.

I personally think that some posts are deleted just to get the super-sensitive people to clam-up....rather than have WWIII break-out over a post.

which is sad because a good row every now and then can be refreshing. Biut we are living now in PC land. No one is allowed - well, some are allowed and some aren't - to be straightforward and honest, no matter how nicely they word things. Certain words or bedhaviors or even apparel, colors, or brands carry a negative connotation, unacceptable in our overly-sensitive world.

Case in point: a friend and I went to hear a speaker who said he'd been invited by a militia group to be its chaplain. My friend failed to pick up on the speaker's response, which was to quickly decline and distance himself from this "terrible group" and when he was speaking later to one of the officers in the speaker's group, my friend said, "Anybody who was invited to be chaplain to the militia can't be all bad", the guy asked him if he was carrying a weapon. Now there's an appropriate rejoinder. Friend says "no", guy says "what's in your pocket", pal says "Insulin testing kit".

Guy says, "Oh, I thought you had a gun, since you made the comment about the militia and since you're wearing a camoflauge jacket". :eek: :chuckle

Talk about stereotyping, ignorance, and just plain dumb. The point is, we just are living in this kind of world where we have to walk on eggshells, lest we offend someone. :banghead:

Whatever happened to the good old days of meet me in the park and we'll settle this thing.? :yeah::devil:

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Every internet site has its own biases I've noticed. It sounds like you uncovered one of theirs. You'll have to avoid that subject from now on there.

How sad is it when sound advice being given is deemed inappropriate by someone who hit the "panic" button! We should feel free to give opinion.. not post in fear of being reprimanded or being banned. I am so weary of watered downed, "let's all hug", responses. When someone posts a concern, I assume they want true responses. We are so concerned in our politically correct society, that we lose sight of our goals when networking.

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