glass of water-stat

[canoehead, BSN, RN]

One of our docs is writing orders for routine nursing care. We loved her before but this might result in a group hug, or an all out riot. How about some humorous responses to some really dumb orders.

remove Bandaid

yep this was the same patient

apply Bandaid

glass of water (patient was actively vomiting)

provide water with pills

please assist patient to commode

ask family to leave please

[Idon'tcodgerdodge]

I've seen doctors write "Please feed patient every meal" (duh?)

How bout this?

Doctor wrote for bilateral teds and thigh high scds for LLE amputee...

I heard a resident wrote PERRLA in a patient's H&P when they had one glass eye!

[traumaRUs, MSN, APRN]

We had an ER physician too that was passive-aggressive. Since we used computerized charting, we actually had to sign-off these ridiculous orders! What a waste of time! I finally got fed up with it and went to the unit manager about it. I had asked politely several times for MD to desist from this practice but she wouldn't, so she ended up in trouble over the silliness of her orders.

[nurturing_angel]

We have a surgeon who writes in the orders "Fire nurse so and so" every time he gets upset about something. We also have a doctor who insists on writing an order for "someone to please write an incident report" when he becomes displeased about something.

[HeatherB,CST]

My brother has been in the same hospital several times over the last few years, and he's always requested no cheese in any of his meals. It's kind of a pain for the nurses to deal with this 3x a day, so someone got a doc to put it in his chart.

Now, whenever he's in there, they look under allergies, and find "Does not like cheese".

They always assume he's lactose intolerant, and he explains that no, he can have milk/ice cream, he just hates cheese.

[scattycarrot, BSN, RN]

I love it when docs say stuff which is just soooo obvious and really doesn't need to be said. Such as, when a patient is having fluid resus for hypotension and the doc says, ' we need to keep an eye on their blood pressure'...really??? Wow!!! Or, when the patients is already on a monitor and they say...'this patient needs to be on a monitor'. Etc...etc...

I think its a power thing......

[everthesame, LPN, LVN]

Once had a doc write for patient to be admitted to a room with a window. The order was written for a patient who had been "23 hr obs" status the night before and was being changed to an admit. The doc wrote the order after he saw the patient...in his room with, you guessed it, a window.

[L&Dnurse2Be]

"See above orders" This one drives me nuts!!!

[prmenrs, RN]

We have a surgeon who writes in the orders "Fire nurse so and so" every time he gets upset about something. We also have a doctor who insists on writing an order for "someone to please write an incident report" when he becomes displeased about something.

I'll bet your risk management just loves that!! Nothing like making it easier for the pts lawyer. Thank you, Doc!

[MadisonsMomRN, BSN, RN]

We had an order to give Coumadin prn... huh, what?

[Miss Mab]

We have one of these in our Ed. Man, he bugs the CR#@ out of me.

We have some computerized entry so he will put in cardiac monitor, pulse ox, etc. (yeah, already on 'em since they got here two HOURS ago and I ordered all the labs and xray before you added these important orders to the bottom of the list-----duh doc, thanks) and I know part of that is CYA but it's irritating since it's always already done. Like the "we should watch the BP" doc. Really? Who'd a thunk?

But his big thing is on the little blank for the comments and he has a thing for exclamation points. Like, ambulate before DC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Um, check buddy, on it. Or urine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Trust me, if I wasn't already threated to be sued for battery, cath would already be done. I KNOW we need the UA, probably one (!) would suffice if you must but not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. He'll also write it out in the chart. Like for a migraine pt. who was lucky enough to get a private room--"Lights Low" underlined and !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

ARGH......My little peeve. About a month ago I wrote into the comments of a patient of his "quit with the !!!!". I haven't actually noticed if he stopped, but now that I think of it, I haven't noticed it lately. Hmmmm....

[Krysten]

We have a Dr that writes "put pt in gown" before he even sees the pt.