Murphy's Law of Nursing

[Pepper The Cat]

1. The admission they want to send you is always the opposite sex of your only available bed - resulting in bed moves.

2. A certain MD always takes at least 20 minutes to respond to your page - except for the time when you page him and then run to the bathroom - that time he calls back in 3 minutes.

3. The loud snorer is never roommates with the pt who is deaf. No, he is roommates with the light sleeper.

4. Families always want to talk to the discharge planner, social worker, specialist or manager on a Sunday afternoon when none of these people are working. and the get mad at YOU because they are not available.

5. Pts are either constipated requiring laxs, enemas etc, or have exploding diarrhea.

What are your Murphy's Laws?

[DarkBluePhoenix]

I dont like walking to the linen closet or supply room and then get there and totally forget whats needed...that patient that needed, is on the opposite side of the floor too....

drat!

[smurfynursey]

If you say someone (ie, a kid that is trached/vented) had a really good night with no desats, they will inevitably crash or get a plug shortly after you leave.

ug!

And I know others have said this...but...

UNSPEAKABLE evils will befall anyone that says the unit is "the q word"

[Twinmom06, ASN, APN]

I just started as an aide last week but inevitably 3 of the 5 shifts I've worked I've had a code brown 15 min before I leave! Last one was a pt on Lactulose, with a rectal tube who decided to d/c his rectal tube himself...

[nursefrances, BSN, RN]

sapphire18 said:

Bring 2 needles into the room, you get the stick. Bring 1 and you miss.

And this is why I ALWAYS bring two.

[nursefrances, BSN, RN]

Another Murphy's law: you think of things to add to the post while reading other posts but when you get to the end you can't remember what you wanted to write.

[Pepper The Cat, BSN, RN]

nursefrances said:

Another Murphy's law: you think of things to add to the post while reading other posts but when you get to the end you can't remember what you wanted to write.

That is so true! When I'm awake at 4:00 am having my hot flash, I remember what I wanted to say! ?

[anotherone, BSN, RN]

A pt will ring the bell endlessly the whole night. CONSTANTLY- get me this, get me that, pull my blanket up or down or to the side 1/4 inch. when he/she is not ringing you have to go in the room for meds, or vitals, pt will most likely be on her/his cell phone the whole night. Come rounds, the whole surgery team, about 6 of them, will watch as the attending goes on and on about keeping the patient up the whole night. You will tell them off loudly, while the residents/students stare in awe/shock. Maybe that is just me.

You will check the patient's diaper/briefs at 6:20pm . Come 7pm bedside shift report there is a massive code brown. The nurse getting your patient is the one who assumes you didn't check the pt the whole day, and reports this off to EVERYONE.

[RNsRWe, ASN, RN]

You have only two minutes to give a patient her meds before you know you have to run to admit a patient/get a pt from bathroom/whatever. This same patient who normally takes her pills without fuss now has to know every side effect, whether she can take the blue one instead of the white one like she used to, whether you can mix it into pudding because she likes pudding, and while you're doing all that, could you also adjust her pillows and HOB angle?

[workingharder]

After getting the ambulatory surgery pt changed, hooked up to vitals, ecg, finished the preop q&a ( including NPO status), found a decent vein, started an IV, and notified OR; THEN he will ask if the breakfast he ate at Denney's an hour ago will "really be a big deal".

[amoLucia]

Same thing with foley catheters! happens just like 1 vs 2 needles dilemma!

[Pepper The Cat, BSN, RN]

amoLucia said:

Same thing with foley catheters!

I was thinking thing!

[KelRN215, BSN, RN]

You've asked a family 14 times if they want help washing their 2 year old and they have said no 14 times. Then, at 7:10 grandmama shows up and pitches a fit about how the child didn't have a bath today and insists that you help her parents do it because the 4 adults in the room are somehow incapable of bathing a 2 year old.