Just need to vent about my exasperating coworker.

Nurses General Nursing

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Specializes in Pediatrics, ER.

My coworker, God bless her, has been a psych nurse for twenty something years. She describes herself as old school and is not afraid to admit that she tortures new staff because she doesn't trust them. She has been through some difficult emotional situations recently as well as ailing health, and as a result has been even more difficult. She doesn't like change, doesn't do some of the work because it involves new learning styles she is not willing to take on at this time, doesn't listen to your report (or write report down!) and then will turn around and complain in a passive-agressive style the next time you report off to her that things aren't being passed along that need to be. She gets in every dig she can at me because I'm a young nurse, and she purposely drags out report so that I can't leave on time. I have to repeat myself several times and really explicate the important things to make sure they sink in. When I work a day shift and she's giving report from the overnight, everything is rushed and we have to get things done quickly because she has to go somewhere or has plans, but she has no problem not being on time for me or interrupting my report several times to socialize with other staff.

Tonight she came in, got her coffee, settled in and started talking with a counselor. I tried several times to catch her attention but she would just continue. At 11:15 I finally had to flat out tell her I wanted to get report going. I started going over the shift report reminders and she interrupted me to tell me that things aren't being passed on, that she had to talk with the nurse manager because the overnight nurse (her) is missing out on a lot of things. I asked her to specify and she couldn't give an example, she just said "oh you know, things." My nurse manager gave me a little public note of acknowledgement for being proactive about taking an extra admission over census capacity, and this nurse took it as a dig at her for some reason. She then went off about how she talked with the nurse manager about admissions this morning and clarified the extra admission policy and how she used to always take an extra patient above census but then they change things and blah blah blah. I refocused her again to try and get report finished and she interrupted me to go back to the very first patient I reported on and then reiterated the "things aren't getting passed on thing," to which I somewhat snapped that this is me passing it on so please pay attention. I'm about four patients in and she interrupts me to talk to a counselor. I interrupt her and say "okay, so this patient" and she talks right over me. I tried to restart report THREE more times and then she held up her finger and told me to hold on one minute, this is important...she starts talking to him about her television and how she couldn't figure out the tuner!!! I looked at her and told her I really needed to get this going, that this was my 7th day of work in a row and I was getting a little squirrely. She told me "Oh well, you're young. Welcome to the world of nursing." I told her I didn't care how young I was, I was tired and wanted to get home. She let me get through report that time but not without going back to each patient when I was on another patient to ask the same things I'd already reported to her because she doesn't write it down. She LOVES to use the line on me that I'm young, and when we have really hectic nights with several difficult patients (it's one nurse for the unit with 12 patients max on a pedi psych unit) she tells me "Welcome to the world of nursing. This is what you get when you want to run with the big dogs." And that's fine, except that I don't make any comments to precipitate that statement. I don't complain when we have aggressive patients or express my frustration, she'll just take it upon herself to make a comment when I'm reporting on the patient's behaviors. I feel as though she wants to punish me for going into nursing. Other staff find her difficult to work with as well. She openly comments when she has all women staff on, she'll frown and "tsk" because there's no male if things get out of hand. She has one staff member who is a clear favorite and will tell him loudly in front of other staff "Oh, XYZ, I wish you were on tonight, I'm working alone with these other two staff."

Tonight she also made it a point to sit across the nursing station from me and say "I'm not sitting near you because I don't want to offend you with my breath." Last week she came in with a really fruity smell on her that hit you the second she walked in the room, like someone who's been drinking or a patient who's in DKA. She's diabetic and I was concerned so I asked her if her sugars were okay. She said that they were and asked why, and I told her that I was worried because I know she's diabetic and she has a sweet, fruity smell like a patient who's in DKA. I didn't say it offensively, I didn't tell her that her breath smelled or even that it was her breath (it wasn't!), but she made it a point to make that a dig tonight. I told her to cut the crap, that I was worried about her last week and wanted to make sure she's okay. Lately she's been coming in disheveled with stains on her clothing and wearing slippers to work, and wearing a ton of bright peach blush. She had a recent major loss in her life and she's more irritable than ever, so it does concern me that there's a possibility she could be drinking, but I'd never say that to her. It isn't my place to confront her on something like that.

There are so many more examples I could give but I feel like I gave enough to show the big picture. I'm not looking for advice, I just needed a place to vent with people who understand what I'm going through! Thanks so much if you got through this.

Well it seems you need to bring this to the attention of the supervisor since the woman won't respond to your repeated requests to stay on task. There is definitely something wrong with her but it is not your job to fix it or to be burdened because of her inability to get with the program. If it weren't extra work, I would do a note sheet on your report info and hand it to her at the time you need to leave. But that is the type of remedy that usually backfires on the person trying it. Talk to your supervisor. You are entitled to clock out and leave on time.

She sounds unstable. Slippers to work? I would definitely have a convo with the nurse manager.

Specializes in ER, ARNP, MSN, FNP-BC.

SarahBeth,

I feel your frustration. I am sorry you have to deal with this. It doesn't matter how long she has been a nurse. Yes, she deserves respect for the years she put in. But you deserve respect as well and don't ever think otherwise. In addition, you are describing someone who is progressively getting worse, whether it is depression, dementia, alcoholism, or uncontrolled diabetes. You really must talk to a supervisor and document that you did. If she harms herself or a patient, and you didn't report your concerns you may be in hot water. Not to mention feeling very guilty. I like what Caliotter3 said. You cannot own a problem that is not yours. You are not responsible for her behavior and you have a right to be out at a reasonable time and not be bullied. Whether it is personal or a product of whatever dysfuntion is going on with her, it has to end.

It helps to tape report for those claiming "they weren't told". But it sounds like your problem is more extensive, in fact I am wondering how well she is taking care of her patients. The attitude sounds almost like someone in burn-out unless she has had this all along. It seems the manager should be the one to discuss this with her...I would bring these concerns to her. I know you didn't request any advice so just wanted to let you know venting is good also! :)

Specializes in Geriatrics, Transplant, Education.

Oh Sarah, your vent reminds me of one of my co-workers.

I'm sorry you're going through that. I had a co-worker ***** at me last night because I wanted to give her report so I could leave, but she was too busy chit chatting with the other nurse. Finally I called down to the other desk and was like can you please send so & so down for report because I am only giving her 2 people & I need to go.

She proceeded to be rude and interrupt my report (asking questions on issues that I was getting to if she'd have just shut up and let me continue). I just don't understand people sometimes...can totally relate to your vent!

Specializes in Neuro ICU and Med Surg.

I would have a conversation with the manager about her. Especially the fact she can't focus on report and would rather socialize.

Sounds like the situation in the original post is definitely a patient safety issue. As someone who is aware of the situation the poster has a responsibility to report to the manager. This is especially true considering the very venerable population involved. Our manager tells us that if we are aware of a situation then we do "own" it until we pass it on to someone higher.

Specializes in Neuro ICU and Med Surg.

I have a few people that I have issues giving report to. I have a hard time giving report to one of the other charge nurses when I am in charge, he dosen't listen at all. He would rather socialize while I am telling him what is going on out on the unit and what problems could arise. I keep having to refocus him. It also irritates me to no end that he come in late.

Last week I had a incredibly critical patient. I was giving my end of shift report to the oncoming nurse and her orientee. The nurse who was precepting kept interrupting me by talking about other things than report. She kept leaning on me also. I had to keep telling her to stop. She also kept stopping me to explain why this pt with this HUGE dissecting AAA needed strict BP control. I had no problem with that except that should have been done after I gave report. I saw the orientee a few days later and apologized for getting off track so many times due to all the interruptions, and she told me I gave a really good report in spite of all the interruptions. That kind of crap makes me so irritated.

Specializes in Trauma, Teaching.

Get your manager's permission to tape report, not ahead of time but the actual report. Tell her "We're addressing your concern that things aren't getting passed on. This way you can review my report as needed". Either it will make her straigten up as she won't want this behavior on tape, or if she's really off base she won't know what's going on. Do it several nights in a row, especially if she gets her act together the first time. It likely won't last, and you'll get the behavior on tape.

It will let your manager hear just what is going on, and have something concrete to address.

Specializes in Operating Room Nursing.

She's walking all over you...my advice is chin up, stand up for yourself and don't be a doormat.

If someone wants to chit chat during report then why on earth are you letting them!!! ....I would just keep talking over them, louder if I had to and yes I have done this in the past and it works. If they don't listen then don't make it your problem, just keep talking and don't let them shut you up, finish your report and leave. They'll soon learn that your not going to be the submissive nurse that will wait for them to stop talking about television.

Specializes in Trauma, Teaching.

I don't know Scrubby, this person sounds like there is more than just passive/aggressive going on here. Your approach certainly is what I would do with the routine obnoxiousness, but that isn't the feeling I got from the OP. Just MHO.

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