EEK! There's a MAN in my room!

Nurses General Nursing

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Specializes in LTC.

At my facility, some residents have tried to avoid care from employees who are African American as a matter of policy. Usually, they say, "I don't want a [unrepeatable] working with me!" When this happens, they get a looooong talk from management, who explains in no uncertain terms that they *will* be cared for by *whomever* happens to be assigned to them, and if this is unacceptable they are more than welcome to transfer to another facility.

At this same facility, I have some residents who say "I don't want a MAN working with me!" When this happens, the men get a looooong talk from management, who explains in no uncertain terms that residents have *rights* and we will need to juggle assignments and if this is unacceptable they are more than welcome to transfer to another facility.

I don't "get" why we don't tolerate the first form of discrimination but actively embrace the second. I've been told it isn't my problem (I'm female) and maybe I need some sensitivity training (patients' rights) or some Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (belief adjustment).

The traditional definition of discrimination says it can only take place against oppressed groups. It's only about what happens to people in the disempowered classes, like women. The traditional definition addresses groups.

The new definition involves "disparate treatment" or "disparate impact". This is intentionally treating an individual (like a male employee) less favorably than another individual (like a female employee) in the same circumstances. This definition addresses individuals.

I see in nursing education that a male nursing student who is not provided with the opportunity to help female patients is not receiving the same level of education and training as his female peers, and this is unethical. (Bala Shark, https://allnurses.com/forums/f213/instructor-not-letting-me-get-female-patients-during-clincal-138135.html )

In nursing practice, I'm seeing that a male nursing employee (CNA, in my case) is not allowed to work with the 97-pound person who has rights, and seems to end up with the 306 pound person who has C-diff. Looks like "disparate treatment" or "disparate impact" to me.

Is this ... ethical? I feel like I should be doing something, or saying something to somebody, hence this post.

Preaching to the choir but there is nothing you are going to be able to say or do to make a difference. You have to pick your battles and frankly, this battle is not win-able.

Specializes in SICU.

Yes it is unethical and yes it happens. You need to decide how far you are willing to push for equal rights. You could end up loosing your job or being forced out. However if you want to push this, start making notes of when your assignment is changed and what type of pt's you are getting compared to others. Have this written down and go to management with it, do not let them keep it. If you don't get anywhere with them you can them take it to your local anti-discrimination office. Things will never change unless people stand up and demand it.

Specializes in Med Surg, Ortho, Tele, ICU, Hospice.

I've been subject to that discrimination myself, as a male. By and large, I've found that opinion to be nigh nonexistent among people under eighty or so (but that's just my opinion; worth what you paid for it.)

The real inequality comes when the responsibility falls to the aide to trade pts with another - you're likely to get screwed pretty hard on the deal.

A lot of people seem more comfortable when you go in to "assist" a female aide/nurse, even if you're doing the bulk of the work.. plus it's legal CYA to have another person present.

But really, if a pt is not allowed to request another caregiver for any old arbitrary reason, they shouldn't be allowed to request for gender.

Call it the nature of the beast, but I've never met a guy who turned away a female caregiver.. :lol2:

Specializes in Corrections, neurology, dialysis.

I see this in school during L&D clinicals. None of the patients will allow a male nursing student near them, but don't have a problem with females. What I'm wondering is why is it okay for them to have a male doctor or med student, but not a male nursing student? Aren't we all professionals here?

Specializes in ICU,PCU,ER, TELE,SNIFF, STEP DOWN PCT.

I have to agree this is wrong no matter sex or race.

But you are right, I always see my MALE RNs have to take care of the heavy patients:cause they are male and strong" Well I think they have a right to get the 97 lb lady too.

Personally I have to say the patient has no right to choose as LONG as they are well taken care of, I mean I have heard lil old ladies say"Oh I do not want a male" Like stated You have been taken care of clothed and NAKED by male Med students, and doctors and other folks, so I see NO reason in their mind to feel that way about male RNs. I have actually found them to be more caring then SOME female counter parts.:uhoh3:

I personally do not care as long as "I" am taken care of, but JMHO.

Specializes in Day Surgery, Agency, Cath Lab, LTC/Psych.

I cringe whenever I see a male assigned the heavy patients. We shouldn't treat our guys like forklifts ladies! They can't lift 500# singlehandedly! :uhoh3:

Specializes in Peds Rehab, Informatics.

Ah yes, the age old issue continues. As a soon to be nurse who happens to be a male, I have encountered "member prejudice" at least once a month if not more. When I can, I try to switch the assignment to accommodate the request. I can understand the reasoning behind this, as I am quite modest myself. I am pretty sure the reason that this occurs is due to the fact that I look like a 16 year old. People look at me and assume that I am still in high school when in fact I have been in the profession for six years! Usually, after working with them for a few hours they begin to see that I really do care about my patients and that I Gasp!.... actually know what I am doing. After my sweet little old ladies realize this, many of them request me by name! As far as my Ob rotation in school, I didn't have one single mom that wouldn't let me take care of her. I think that attitudes towards men in nursing has improved a lot over the past few years.

Specializes in Med Surg, Ortho, Tele, ICU, Hospice.
They can't lift 500# singlehandedly! :uhoh3:

Just for the record, some of us can;). I mean, with 45 minutes' warmup, chalk and a REALLY good grip. The thing is, possible or not, it's not nice!

I have yet to meet a male aide or nurse who will refuse to help with a lift.

What I'm wondering is why is it okay for them to have a male doctor or med student, but not a male nursing student?

I doubt it will make you feel better, but this is a perpetual problem in medicine and medical education as well.

On my L&D rotation as a student, I barely made my required number of deliveries because so many women (and their husbands) didn't want me in the room. Even worse, we once had a woman who absolutely refused all men in the room for her deliver. Unfortunately the attending, Chief Resident, and R2 were all men that night, leaving the intern to deliver the baby alone (scary!).

I really think the tone gets set by the people in charge. If the "authority figure" is willing to tell the patient that this everyone is a professional and there for her benefit, they tend to accept it. But when those in power (especially, I hate to say, the women in power) validate this irrationality, the patient is emboldened in their stance.

Patients need to understand that, in health care, sex is farthest thing from any caregiver's mind.

Specializes in ICU,PCU,ER, TELE,SNIFF, STEP DOWN PCT.
Just for the record, some of us can;). I mean, with 45 minutes' warmup, chalk and a REALLY good grip. The thing is, possible or not, it's not nice!

I have yet to meet a male aide or nurse who will refuse to help with a lift.

HAHA, but I think it is not that they wont help but they get "stuck" with the heavy care pt in more then one way 5/6 times.

Specializes in acute care.

Maybe the patient has a reason that they don't want to be cared for by a man. You never know what a patient has been through. Until recently, for reasons that I don't feel the need to explain since they are my own personal reasons, I would only go to women gynecologists or PCPs.

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