Funniest real orders you have seen in a chart?

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To start things off, the best and funniest order I have seen on a chart, was in the discharge instructions for a trauma patient. It read simply

Darwin Consult

and was signed by the resident. Well the attending did laugh, but it was not the highpoint of that residents day.

so do you have more?

Patient is an adult and may choose to go down to the street corner to smoke any time. (Strict nonsmoking hospital) NO I don't want to hear about it at 2 am!

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When I was in nursing school the hospital I did clinical at used Flinstones as the MVI. One dr wrote: MVI po daily, no Barney Rubble

Another time I was working as an RN on an Oncology/Medsurg unit. We had a pt who refused to give her address, refused any assistance, blah blah. Dr wrote: D/C to cardboard box

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Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..
Dr wrote: D/C to cardboard box
:yeah::yeah::yeah:
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Specializes in ICU.

It's not really funny, but from a very compassionate Dr. "Backrubs Q shift"

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I work on a neuro/ICU unit... very specialized. So we really don't deal with anything except head and neck cases. Three of my colleagues and I were trying to decide the term for removal of kidney.

Renalectomy was the first word that came to mind. AFter about a minute we decided that didn't sound right and figured out the correct term

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Specializes in ER, progressive care.

I was sitting by an MD one day who was joking around with the orders...he's like "watch this" and types in "ETOH PO stat & prn" :lol2: submitted it, was shown in the active orders, then d/c's it.

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In the NICU: Please handle pt gently.

Ya think??

We get orders to print labels all the time, too.

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Specializes in Pedatrics, Child Protection.

Not an order, but just read in a letter:

"the patient is tolerating her carcinogenic diet"

Uh oh....ketogenic maybe?

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In an H&P: "Right leg was found to be gangrenous. Left leg was subsequently amputated."

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Specializes in Adult Oncology.

This was actually from when I was a unit clerk: "Pt's dog may visit."

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"1 BEER Q4H". Pharmacy basically has a full liquor cabinet believe it or not, everything from budweiser to jack

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Specializes in LTC.

Lemon drops for dry mouth.

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