Frustrated with having to work

Nurses General Nursing

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I am a nurse at a BMT unit. I have worked here for 11 years. I work 3 12 hr night shifts in a row then have 11 shifts off. That is my schedule ... 3 12 hrs shifts on. 11days off.

My problem is I am burnt on on working. Not necessarily on being a nurse. Just working. I hope I don't sound like a whiner. I just want to stay home and be a mom and a housewife. It is so hard to leave home. I know this is totally unreasonable.

I have to work. Everyone in the world has to work. But in my lizard brain I cannot let go of the, " oh I don't want to go to work". I have actually called in sick so often I think am am starting to get a bad reputation. This makes work even more difficult.

Part of the difficulty of me not wanting to go to work is:

1. Nursing is all policy and procedure. I feel as if I don't get it all or don't remember it all. Ecspecially working partime. Plus so many things change at my unit feel don't know all the changes from week to week. And I feel like I should know more than i do as I am a senior nurse. Knowing what to do for a crashing pt is getting more difficult for me, not easier. Grrr...why is this?

2. I am having a hard time dealing with difficult patients. Whether they be mean, demanding, rude or whiny. I just can't effectively handle them any more with out gritting my teeth and screaming silently in my head. Patients family members can alsobemore than I can deal with. It did not used to be like this, but it is now.

3. I want to stay home

Does anyone else HAVE to drag themselves to work because they have no choice to not work?

Changing jobs is not the answer. Where else am I going to get this schedule with no weekends and no holidays required to work,

No where that's the truth. Besides it's not this job that frustrates me it's any job.

I keep telling myself in today's job market I'm LUCKY to have a good job. Plus I provide the health insurance for my family.

How do you make yourself go to work? Or are you like most of my co workers and going to work is easy, no problem. I wish that were me.

Specializes in mental health, aged care/disability care.

I felt like that when I was working nights and ended up calling in sick more often than not.

I work days now and I feel a lot better about going to work now.

I wouldn't want to work your schedule either. Too much time off in a row makes me not want to go back to work.

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Specializes in Acute Care, CM, School Nursing.

I agree. I think the 11 days off is probably making it tough for you. It really is like going back after a vacation, time after time after time. You should try to redo your schedule.

Best wishes, hang in there!

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Specializes in CHN, MH & Addictions, Acute Med, Neuro..

You may think your schedule is awesome but I think it is what is getting you down. I think a change of pace would be great for you. Maybe something less acute but still challenging. Then you don't have to worry about the pressures of being a senior nurse or responding to emergency situations regularly.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to not work - but it may time to think of finding something outside of the home to drive your passion since you have to work.

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Please be proud of what you do. It is a great responsibility, and there are only a few good nurses out there. :)

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Specializes in ED, Tele, L&D.

I used to work part time nights and my requirement was 4 12 hour shifts per pay period, so I just spaced them out. I NEVER worked 2 consecutive nights. That way, going to work at night just seemed like a hiccup in my day. On the days when I had to work at night I would take a nap when my kids napped and then the next morning I would only sleep until about noon and then take an afternoon nap with my kids again. I HATED going to work - I worked on a tele floor and I just did not enjoy the work at all - fortunately my coworkers were great and they made it tolerable. It did suck getting report on 4-5 new patients every shift, but I only had to be with them for 12 hours, and then most of them were usually gone by the time I came back for my next shift.

A friend of mine works part time and she works 3 shifts every two weeks - she works Wed, then Sat and then not again until the next Friday and then she starts they cycle all over again. I think it's a pretty sweet schedule.

I've been working VERY per diem for the past year in a department that I really love and I usually only work a few shifts per month, but I'm getting ready to start working full time nights again. I'm really trying to mentally prepare myself. I'm just hoping that since my kids are older and I can sleep during the day while they're in school the schedule will be tolerable.

It sounds like something needs to change for you - I hope you can figure out what that is. Perhaps a change of scenery. Good luck!!

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Can I go with? PLEASE? I LOVE the idea/dream of going there.....Dunno if the reALITY OF IT WILL EVER MATCH THE FANTASY OF IT, BUT i REALLY NEED TO GIVE IT A TRY....scuse the caps...........

Two things keep me going, my family, and the thought of going to places like this.

Hang in there!

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Specializes in Medical Surgical Orthopedic.

Sometimes, I want to move somewhere rural and grow my own veggies for sustenance! My grandparents actually lived that way ....my grandfather even built his own house with the help of a few friends and lots of whiskey. Work seems too detached from "real" life at times.

I'm usually happy once I get to my job, but I do have trouble waking myself up and dragging myself there. I planned on marying someone who could support me, but I ended up marrying an "artist". Oops!:down:

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Specializes in LTC,Hospice/palliative care,acute care.

It's kind of difficult to be sympathetic today-I work full time day shift in LTC, including every other weekend and half the major holidays. I would LOVE to go to part time but we do not have any part time positions and the job market in this area sux just like it does everywhere else.

I also often wish I never had to leave the house and deal with people ever again but anti- depressants do help with that. Maybe you are depressed? I can almost not stand families and visitors these days,too.That's pretty common. Your schedule is wacky and probably rhe root of your problems-can you do anything to change it? 11 days off must feel like starting a new job everyt time you show back uo.

I have worked full time almost my entire adult life. I was able to stay home for two years just before my son started first grade.We went down to one vehicle and a very tight budget to enable me to do so - I was not exactly able to do lunch with the girls. It was not an easy time.

I believe anyone can be an excellent housewife and mother and work outside of the home if they want to and that almost anyone can afford to go the SAHM route if they are willing to make the hard sacrifices. I could quit my job today if I- sold my car, shut off FIOS , Direct TV, and the cell phone.We would not have vacations and I would have to work hard at meal planning and coupon clipping.I could get a few people together and buy bulk groceries.I could bake my own bread,make my own pasta and freeze/can lots of fresh veg. We would have difficulty providing vet care for the pets but we could probably barter for services with a few local vets. Yard sale season is over but I guess we all have enough clothes to hold us until next summer.We can borrow dvd's and use the computer at the library. There are affordable health care plans out there-I have 2 bro in laws whom buy their own insurance. I could also offer my services locally to the elderly and disabled a few hours a day doing home care,light chores and running errands or taking them to appointments, clean a few houses and maybe keep the car.My husband would be willing to pick up some OT or another part time gig if I did ALL of the house and yard work, I'm sure-he has told me so. Hmmmm-I've got some thinking to do.....

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I know you said you were not interested in switching jobs, but maybe you could think about something other than floor nursing? Something like working in occupational health for a hospital or school nursing would be 5 days a week, but less acuity, less "emergency" situations, less stress, and more routine. I work at a college in student health; 6 hours a day, 5 days a week and am home by 3 everyday. It is stress free and I don't dread going to work.

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Please, I know this is way tooo cliche'- but 6 years ago, I didn't even know if I would be here to go to work, ( stage 2 breast cancer, axillary nodes positve) -when I was going through treatment, I use to think how nice it would be to just be having a regular day..like waking up and going to work, just another day.. now 6 years later, I actually have that again, and even though ,(I have days like today) where it is just way too nice outside to go to work!!!!!--- but that is my life, and thank you God, for letting it be... "just another day"

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Thank you all for posting your thoughts. It really does help to know that I am not the only one that has this issue of wanting, pleading to stay home.

Thank you cecilsgirl for adding some perspective. Even though I work BMT it is easy to lose sight of things to be thankful for.

I do believe that everyone is correct when they say that it is harder to go ba k to work after 11 days off. It probably would be easier to go into work if I worked more frequently. But the thought of that also has me pulling my hair out.

Please note that even though I don't want to go to work, am I a very good nurse when I am at work.

Also I plan to work on this BMT floor for the next 25 years until I am 65. So I'd better find some way to accept the plain fact...I HAVE to work.

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What is BMT (I'm thinking it's a sandwich at Subway, LOL)? I've been trying to figure it out :). I am new to working fulltime (working at all since becoming a mom 10 yrs ago) and I struggle with leaving my family for my night shifts :(. I struggle with being tired when I am off. I struggle with having no motivation to do the housewife stuff now that I am bringing home an income and I'm so zonked after doing my time! My husband now does most of the grocery shopping. I still have the burden of all the laundry for 6 people, and the dishes, and the cleaning. I don't want to feel like this in 10 yrs like you. Trying to figure out the balance and not resent my husband for being a victim of the economy and the auto industry cutbacks (thankfully re-employed but making less). I had no idea when I was going through nursing school how much the job can take out of you. I'm currently thinking I'd rather be poor and have a clean house and kids who don't run to their dad for everything :(. I guess if I want to have a retirement portfolio and savings account that Suze Orman would be proud of I need to keep plugging away. My husband told me I could quit if I didn't like my current job but he changed his tune after I started. I guess I need to put my big girl panties on and hope for a different job that I actually enjoy in the future.

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