My brother just got hired at a hospital ER 3 weeks ago. HEs already experienced so he will be in orientation for weeks.
I applied to the same hospital ER. I Just graduated, no experience, basically not expecting to get hired. But I got called and going to be interviewed soon for their graduate nurse residency program ER.
So we're gonna be on the same floor.
Is It OK? Legal? Or Whatever?
Should I quit before I fall in too deep?
Stop now or my brother throws a tantrum? His tantrums are on a whole nother level. Or some kinda conflict of whatever, happens.
I kinda want to go on cause this is a great opportunity. But, this family member issue is really too crazy bothering me.
My brother just got hired at a hospital ER 3 weeks ago. HEs already experienced so he will be in orientation for weeks.
I applied to the same hospital ER. I Just graduated, no experience, basically not expecting to get hired. But I got called and going to be interviewed soon for their graduate nurse residency program ER.
So we're gonna be on the same floor.
Is It OK? Legal? Or Whatever?
Should I quit before I fall in too deep?
Stop now or my brother throws a tantrum? His tantrums are on a whole nother level. Or some kinda conflict of whatever, happens.
I kinda want to go on cause this is a great opportunity. But, this family member issue is really too crazy bothering me.
To add more info:
We're not that close of siblings. We hate each other. I hate him more, but I'm more patient and passive just so there's no fight, just for my parents. So they wont have any headaches or whatever.
When I got the call, I was excited and then I told my parents and my brother happens to be there and he started getting mad and making stupid ultimatums. Like "either you turn it down and go somewhere else and don't work in same unit as me, or I'll quit if you work the same floor as I do." My parents responded: "but you just started..." He said "I don't care."
We're not that close of siblings. We hate each other. I hate him more, but I'm more patient and passive just so there's no fight, just for my parents. So they wont have any headaches or whatever.
When I got the call, I was excited and then I told my parents and my brother happens to be there and he started getting mad and making stupid ultimatums. Like "either you turn it down and go somewhere else and don't work in same unit as me, or I'll quit if you work the same floor as I do." My parents responded: "but you just started..." He said "I don't care."
So yeah... Drama.
How old are ya'll? I would start now deciding how you (and only you) are going to put some big girl pants on and start an adult career in a very critical area of nursing.
I can not believe that you are "I hate him, he hates me" like you are 12. I don't mean to sound harsh, but perhaps a family meeting is in order so that your parents can give ya'll a firm talking to. Especially if you are living at home. If you are all independent and live on your own, you can only control yourself and your behavior. Other nurses are not going to play sibling argument and rivalry and you both may end up jobless. They can get 2 more nurses without any drama.
What you do outside of the facility, your family relationship with your brother is no one's business or issue but your own and his. However, in a busy emergency room, where any number of patients are critical, that bull needs to stay outside. Period.
My own brother is so toxic I had to unfriend him and block him on Facebook. We rarely see each other and only talk when we have to deal with something involving our mother.
If he's threatening to quit if you get the job, then let the big baby do just that. Don't you dare allow him to bully you into throwing away this opportunity.
I've had to distance myself from my family of origin to varying degrees. I'm closest to my dad, see him a few times a year. Already described my brother. And my mom....I don't even know where she is and haven't talked to her for about two years. Her choice, after I chose not to bail her out of years of irresponsibility.
Some people just get screwed when it comes to family. But you can still choose to have a good life. That may mean nagging tough choices about how much you associate with your family or allow them to influence you.
Whatever you do, STOP THIS:
I'm more patient and passive just so there's no fight, just for my parents. So they wont have any headaches or whatever.
Your parents raised that headache. It's their problem, not yours. When I visited my dad over the summer, he and his wife cracked some joke about something that happened when I was a young teenager. Apparently they think that stories of my brother being a total d'bag and them allowing it to go on are comic relief. I let them know that it was horrible while it went on and I find no humor in the fact that they knew exactly what was happening but did nothing to stop it.
I'm bitter and that's not going to go away. I deserved better than I got.
You most likely deserve better than what you're getting from your family. (I don't know you, and we only get one side here.)
As long as neither of you supervises the other, it's generally OK. I've worked with several married couples and pairs of siblings.
You family dyamics, however, are another story. It's time for both of you to learn that work is work, and professionalism is not optional. Whatever roles you play / feed into in your home life need to be left at home.
How old are ya'll? I would start now deciding how you (and only you) are going to put some big girl pants on and start an adult career in a very critical area of nursing.
I can not believe that you are "I hate him, he hates me" like you are 12. I don't mean to sound harsh, but perhaps a family meeting is in order so that your parents can give ya'll a firm talking to. Especially if you are living at home. If you are all independent and live on your own, you can only control yourself and your behavior. Other nurses are not going to play sibling argument and rivalry and you both may end up jobless. They can get 2 more nurses without any drama.
What you do outside of the facility, your family relationship with your brother is no one's business or issue but your own and his. However, in a busy emergency room, where any number of patients are critical, that bull needs to stay outside. Period.
I'm not 12. 22, but he's much older, like 30.
I honestly thought he was gonna be supportive cause employment means moving up but he just turned crazy cause I'll be going into the same unit he's in.
I know and I care about my own professionalism. I am definitely able to set aside personal family issues aside and focus on my professionalism during work.
It is he who has a big problem about it. I don't know why too. He's been more anxious.
I don't have any issues but if I go on, he might go crazy. But the opportunity is just too great to pass on.
So, if you both stay on this unit, and you can't get along, how is this going to impact you and your job? You have to be able to work as a team and honestly, I can see a huge issue here. I doubt he is going to leave this job, he will make you miserable and possibly poison the atmosphere. If you both stay there, I'd make sure you don't work the same shift.
We're not that close of siblings. We hate each other. I hate him more, but I'm more patient and passive just so there's no fight, just for my parents. So they wont have any headaches or whatever.
When I got the call, I was excited and then I told my parents and my brother happens to be there and he started getting mad and making stupid ultimatums. Like "either you turn it down and go somewhere else and don't work in same unit as me, or I'll quit if you work the same floor as I do." My parents responded: "but you just started..." He said "I don't care."
So yeah... Drama.
This changes it up a bit. Siblings working as peers on a unit is usually not a problem...unless family drama is involved, which there will be, apparently.
He was hired first, so he has the upper hand. He also has experience, and you don't. There's a good chance that when the family drama is out in the open, you will be the one canned.
I I think it should be, "Can two people with a dysfunctional relationship with likely work place acting out work on the same unit? And could it ruin my career?"
EternalFeather
103 Posts
To add more info:
We're not that close of siblings. We hate each other. I hate him more, but I'm more patient and passive just so there's no fight, just for my parents. So they wont have any headaches or whatever.
When I got the call, I was excited and then I told my parents and my brother happens to be there and he started getting mad and making stupid ultimatums. Like "either you turn it down and go somewhere else and don't work in same unit as me, or I'll quit if you work the same floor as I do." My parents responded: "but you just started..." He said "I don't care."
So yeah... Drama.