I am having one of those days that just brings me to my knees in terms of my faith or enthusiasm for this profession.
I see SO much adamant, flagrant unprofessionalism in my colleagues, and my managers and leadership.
I see the quotient of profits quickly overtaking people as a priority on all levels of practice. It's sickening how pervasive this is. And accepted.
I have only been at this a few years and am beginning to see grad school (for something unrelated) as a means to get OUT of this mess, and save my quality of life at age 42. Life is too short to be this miserable.
Compassion and fastidiousness are no longer compatible with this line of work.
OP, I hear you and I am right there with you. I am only 5 years in and burnt to a crisp. I wish I had some wonderful words of wisdom for you, but alas I have none. I am still desperately searching for a way to "fill my bucket" but the dread of returning to work invades my free time.
I am still performing well but I am finding it harder and harder to overlook things and most importantly to keep my mouth shut. I cannot muster the energy to even pretend to bow and scrape. I cannot even pretend to care about the customer service and reimbursement driven priorities of JCACHO, CMS, and upper management. I cannot stop from shaking my head at the ways reimbursement is being hijacked by utter nonsense.
I have nothing to offer but sympathy and commiseration.
You do realize how not for profit entities (most hospitals) work right?
Hospitals are exceptionally expensive, all that money goes somewhere
Ill also point out with salary + benefits included nurses get more than the average american.
While only having a bachelors (or less)
That is true, but most nurses assume more direct liability for life/death than the average American worker, and they are also, in general, required to work undesirable hours - that plays a factor in their "above average" wages, which are nothing to write home about.
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
Not knocking on the OP specifically, but whats with all the nurses who seem to blame all hospitals problems on money.
It's hospital administrators themselves who are preoccupied with money. Yes, it takes money to run a hospital. But when they keep sprucing up the lobby, remodeling their offices and other cosmetic non-essentials, then cry poor and refuse to staff for breaks or mandatory inservices, it's a bit hard not to get jaded. While your orthopedic injuries become chronic and you start developing stress-related health problems, they herd everyone down to "Service Excellence" seminars to teach you to parrot scripts. This is to boost the Press-Ganey scores, which are tied to reimbursement.
We don't blame the problems on money; we blame them on disconnected management. Management blames the problems on money. Even though they seem to find it for their pet projects.
At my last job I was one of the few people who had a bachelor's degree and I made $20,000 more than I do now, sitting on my butt. The people with no college degrees took home the same as I did. You do realize there's fields (computer programming, finance, advertising) where people make six figures with "just" a bachelors?
I also learned there's a reason they pay you more at certain jobs - because no one would put up with the misery if they didn't.
There ARE companies that still have their priorities straight- but you may have to work to find them, literally. Heed your instincts when you go on interviews. I've had to learn that the hard way. Also, find your niche. A nursing position that takes you to the bedside and out of the office, clinic, or hospital may be more your thing. I love getting out and going patient to patient as a hospice nurse. I hope you can find a way to love nursing again- patients need that TLC and are unlikely to get it if nurses like you leave the profession.
Why would anyone be surprised? How about because this profession is filled with some of the most cynical, callous, and down right A-holes many of us will meet all lumped together in our lifetime? Take a browse through many of the threads here, for example. It doesn't take long to come across berating and dehumanizing comments. I've had jobs in various fields throughout corporate America, as many of us have, and none of them have been so concentrated with emotionally dense and intellectually abusive people as this one. We all know what I'm talking about here. Whether or not you see it through the lens of degree I see it in, is not my point. My point is, regardless of how the financial, corporate landscape of business effects the merits and treatment of the human beings doing the leg work and or receiving services, we are here to care for human beings. Human beings. For every callous remark and degrading comment to a coworker or another person in the field, we are continually reinforcing a landscape of intellectual insult and competition. We don't seek to listen thoroughly or to accept other expressions regardless of experience level. We don't, as a whole, seek to assess more thoroughly before we define and 'diagnosis' the wake up call one another needs in order to be more "realistic" and less "starry eyed". We simply assert that everyone should grow up and learn to accept things just as they are, or be ridiculed until they do. The problem with these callous, cynical, and many times abusive approaches to other human beings is a multifaceted, complex picture. For one, nothing ever gets done, no goal for improvement, no long or short term revolution or evolution, nothing could ever improve much less be worth while if we all waddled around like ducks quacking at other ducks to stop talking and keep paddling. We can either be waddling ducks, or we can be eagles. The choice is ours. Personally, I'd enjoy my job a lot more if I could work away from a village of abusive, quacking ducks, all poking and prodding at each other to keep waddling.
There ARE companies that still have their priorities straight- but you may have to work to find them, literally. Heed your instincts when you go on interviews. I've had to learn that the hard way. Also, find your niche. A nursing position that takes you to the bedside and out of the office, clinic, or hospital may be more your thing. I love getting out and going patient to patient as a hospice nurse. I hope you can find a way to love nursing again- patients need that TLC and are unlikely to get it if nurses like you leave the profession.
THIS.
One of the things that has helped me weather the spearheading of corporate management if healthcare is being the MOST important aspect of being a nurse-advocacy, that not includes our pts, but for our practice and our careers.
I have weathered a consistent surplus of nurses in my area; area hasn't had a true nursing shortage in decades, and the merging and corporatized healthcare status has made nurses clamor for jobs; but my secret is looking outside of the box for positions and selling myself; also being involved in the process to facilitate change; those aspects and experiences have helped shape my practice and be able to cope in this current system of healthcare; that doesn't mean I don't get frustrated-trust me, working in places where non-medical staff are attempting to make decisions without understanding acuity measures and other ridiculousness without doing the work, for example-I still have my voice and try to advocate with my peers in the trenches; it has been effective; however, I have left places and have found better places to work, even if it meant working in another area of nursing, especially where my autonomy was expanded.
Sugarcoma, RN
410 Posts
OP, I hear you and I am right there with you. I am only 5 years in and burnt to a crisp. I wish I had some wonderful words of wisdom for you, but alas I have none. I am still desperately searching for a way to "fill my bucket" but the dread of returning to work invades my free time.
I am still performing well but I am finding it harder and harder to overlook things and most importantly to keep my mouth shut. I cannot muster the energy to even pretend to bow and scrape. I cannot even pretend to care about the customer service and reimbursement driven priorities of JCACHO, CMS, and upper management. I cannot stop from shaking my head at the ways reimbursement is being hijacked by utter nonsense.
I have nothing to offer but sympathy and commiseration.