DON said mean things about me...which I overheard.

[rehab nurse]

I was asked to come intoday since so many people were out. I can't do pt care, but i was asked to come in and help out with admit paperwork, etc. I have been on medical for a while, so I agreed.

The DON came into the office and shut the door a bit. I was outside the door in a chart, reviewing some paperwork.

She started snickering "Oh, she finally decided to come back to work? What the he** kind of person takes so much time off for BACK PAIN?! Give me a break. I can't wait till she's gone. She's useless. I hope you left her lots of work to do."

I was so upset. What kind of evil person says something like that when I'm outside the door? She didn't say it loud, but once she said my name, I tried to listen what she was saying. I have so many people who thanked me for coming in. PT's, patients, couple of the docs, OT's, nurses. But couple of day nurses and the DON took time out to be nice to my face and then snicker about me behind my back.

Just needed to vent. I'll be leaving there once school is done. but for now I need the insurance, so I've been helping out a couple days a month. I need insurance since I have so many medical problems, and my kids need it too.

Ok, vent over. Just upset that someone was so mean. DON's only been there a couple months. I've been there six years.

[RebeccaJeanRN]

Good replies so far... I'd suggest that you do ALL of them (document, find another place to work as soon as you can, and at the very least, bring it up on your exit interview). One thing about filing a complaint NOW however (because complaints filed while someone is still on the job are given a higher weight than complaints provided in exit interviews by what might be considered disgruntled employees) if you have the backbone (LOL) for it...it might go into the DON's file and follow her a bit. Now there's a nice thought...

[Roy Fokker, BSN, RN]

Praise in public... critivize in private.

That's the way good managers to things.

Sorry yours is being so mean, Rehab nurse

[meownsmile, BSN, RN]

Work your schedule. Decline any xtra hours that particular DON calls you about and then leave as soon as possible.

[rehab nurse]

I think I will just take the rest of my medical leave, which gets me through to when I'm done with school. And I will write out the complaint today and drop it off to the administrator (who's her best friend, but whatever), with a copy going to their corporate office, attention CNO.

I really think what she's trying to do is get rid of EVERYONE who has been there prior to her being there. That way, the new people won't know that she's a bad manager and the place USED to be a good place to work. I've got my good references from the people at the place who told me I was a good nurse. I'll take them and wait till I'm done with school, and then move on. I could use a few more weeks off, that's for sure.

Now, does anyone know how to get my 401k out of their hands? I'd like to put in to get that money out before I quit, otherwise they'll give me a hassle, like they've done to every other ex-employee with a retirement account.

Thanks everyone for your replies. I feel much better today.

[csiln]

My last day of work I was around the corner and heard my name and a night nurse talking about me. So mean, I don't see why nurses are so mean to new nurses. Its hard to have a good day after that.

[catlady, BSN, RN]

Now, does anyone know how to get my 401k out of their hands? I'd like to put in to get that money out before I quit, otherwise they'll give me a hassle, like they've done to every other ex-employee with a retirement account.

Thanks everyone for your replies. I feel much better today.

First, contact the 401k administrator at whatever company is handling your account. Have them stop the deductions from your pay if they're still going on. You should have some idea of where you want the 401k to go, be it a rollover IRA or whatever. Don't just pull the money out; you need to roll it over into another instrument or you'll be paying Uncle Sam bigtime. Then arrange with this administrator to jump through whatever hoops you need to do to move the money. I've had different experiences with different plans. Sometimes the new bank (or whatever) can handle it alone; other times you have to do all the paperwork. Either way, you have a right to move your 401K once you leave, and often you *have* to move it after you leave your employer.

[RebeccaJeanRN]

BEFORE you do anything, best to speak to your benefit plan administrator to ask your questions about your 401K. If that doesn't seem easy, or you know that you cannot stay another minute, then contact specialists in retirement accounts (Dreyfus is one company that comes to mind)- they will often take care of rolling over a 401K for you (all you need is to sign a rollover form). In other words, let a specialist help you get your money out and into another tax deferred type of retirement account. It won't cost you anything and it still can be rolled over again, if need be, at a later date.

Here is an internet site with some 401K answers, I'm sure there are plenty more: http://www.401khelpcenter.com/faq/faq_main.html

[skwlpn]

For years I gave my husband a hard time about his back pain (herniated disc at L5). I told him it could not possibly be as painful as he made it sound. I called him a whiner, etc....then, I got what felt like a bolt of electricity down my R leg followed by the most excutiating pain I have ever had....and I have had many treatments related to CA and other health issues. All of the rest seemed like cake compared to back pain. I have had one flare since the initial accident and I am living in fear of the next. God bless you for going to work with pain and we can only assume that the "meanies" have never suffered the same. I berated my spouse...and I got my just reward...funny how things even out!

Hang in there sweetie. You know you are a better person.

Stacey

[Brainiacster]

If you leave, be sure to deal with your 401k appropriately. You may be able to leave it there for a while & then deal with it later when you have more time. Whatever you do, do NOT pull it out unless you're in the mood to be heavily taxed on it. As other posters have indicated, roll it over (whether now or later). Talk to a financial planner about it (or look it up yourself). You could talk to HR too, but that might tip them off re your possible departure before you want them to to know (also depends on HR too and how you phrase the Q).

BTW, I'm not so sure I'd file a complaint or mention anything in an exit interview. People have a way of gossiping informally & you may find yourself black balled in the future...it's a small world out there. If you plan to leave,best to line up another job and then give the expected 2 week (or whatever it is) notice and leave quietly.

Quite frankly, unless the situation is intolerable or leading to an imminent termination, I'd stay. You're always going to find a few idiots on any job. Best to ignore and keep your paycheck rolling in. As I said, however, if it looks like a termination is imminent, start looking now. Either that, or get to know the right people (chief of staff, chief of medicine, etc...lol get a moonlighting job in their private practices if they have outside practices which many do)...LOL if you're best golfing buddies with them, the DON will be out on her ear soon!

[VivaRN]

This thread is originally from 2006...

[caliotter3]

I hope the original situation has resolved.

[Altra, BSN, RN]

Yes, this is an old thread, and I assume the OP's employment situation has resolved. I hope that her back pain has also resolved.

But if I had been in a position to overhear this conversation ... personally, I would have knocked on the door of the office, entered, and asked the DON, "Did you want to discuss my medical leave? I'll be happy to do that with you, but it doesn't need to be discussed with anyone else." In other words -- confronted her directly, rather than lurk outside the door while I am being badmouthed.

There are bullies out there, but they can only bully you with your permission.