Do what I "should" or do what I want?

[melme]

Hi! I don't post here very often (mainly just lurk!) but as of May 2014, I am a proud owner of my BSN. I went into nursing because I have a passion working with people with special needs and kids in general. I spend a lot of time volunteering at camps, ect and I love it. If I could just do that forever than I would - you don't even have to pay me! THAT is how much I love it.

I really dislike medsurge. In fact, I never liked any of my rotations in the hospital. I was recommended for a medsurge postion by one of my professors at the end of that summer. I scheduled an interview before she even really looked at my application. They made the job sound really appealing so I thought, what the hay, I'll give it a shot. I was even excited about working nights. Really, I was.

But that wore off after about 2 months. And the truth is, I really dislike it. It's not that it's too hard, it's not that it is too stressful, I just don't like it. I hate pushing meds all night long. Every once in awhile, a patient will start having a conversation with me and what do you know, the call lights start going off because someone, somewhere needs something. So I usually leave the patient I am talking to high and dry. Or if I do finish the conversation, I **** about 5 people off. The patient, the secretary, the aids, the other nurses. I dread morning because I know the snappy people in lab are going to call and tell me my patient has a critical lab value. And the doctor that I wake up (because it is mandatory) will just shrug me off so they can go back to sleep.

One night I found myself sitting in the bathroom with the lights off. I had to say a prayer, take a few deep breaths and force myself to go back out there because to be honest, I could give two craps if certain patients get there pain meds. Not when they ask me every dang hour. And giving heparin and protonix to every single person at 6am, no thanks, I'm over it. I know it's important, but really, I have to force myself to put on a happy face as I go into those rooms. And I always hope they aren't too chatty first thing in the morning because really I just want to do my 6am med pass, finish my charting, and leave. Quick.

IT IS NOT FOR ME. I decided that since I dislike my job so much, well I need to find a new one! So I went around to literally 20 different places: allergy clinics, surgical centers, doctor's offices, and I have been scowering jobs online like my life depended on it. Out of all the places I went, I got 3 somewhat promising replies (but again, nothing is ever certain). I'm really hoping one of the allergy clinics will call me back because honestly, it does sound interesting! I've done a little research on what it is they actually DO because I don't want to get stuck at another job I don't like.

Part of me knows I should do the "right" thing and keep this job. I am making good money, I'm learning new things, these people went through the time to train, not to mention that they are counting on me. (Especially when 30 people have quit in 12 months and the rest are slowly dropping off too).

But part of me thinks, you know what, I worked my butt off for 5 years to get this degree if I am not happy - WHY AM I STAYING?

So I am asking you all, people who have quit possibly been in nursing longer than I have been alive, when do you know? How do you decide - do what I should? Or do what I want? I know ultimately it's my decision but well, I'm up for opinions!

[AngelMama]

What about becoming a school nurse?

[melme]

Yes, I have my foot in the door there. I am a substitute health aid on my days off (anywhere from elementary to high school) and I keep in contact with the head nurse over all the schools in our county.

[klone, MSN, RN]

A few thoughts....

With a year or two of med/surg, you will be a LOT more marketable, and can probably find work anywhere - possibly not some specialty hospital units like ED or ICU, but certainly just about every type of ambulatory care clinic, tele units, stepdown units.

However, if you leave M/S now at 2 months in, it will be as if you never worked M/S in the eyes of hiring managers. It will be a lot more difficult to go from an allergy clinic to other areas of nursing.

It sounds to me as if maybe you don't know what you WANT to do, or what interests you (other than camp nursing). What about peds or school nursing? I think you need to figure out your goal, and then figure out the best way to proceed to help you meet that goal. And that might be sticking it out in M/S for another year.

But I'm coming at it from the perspective of someone who has definite career goals; not everyone feels the same way about their work. If you don't really have any strong career goals, and just want to work somewhere that you won't hate your job and you make a decent living, then that certainly opens up a lot more possibilities, and I would say quit your M/S job and find something else.

[melme]

I'm coming up on 5 months in medsurge, not 2 months. I grew tired of it after about 2 months.

[klone, MSN, RN]

Sorry, misunderstood. My point remains.

[Libby1987]

I'm not sure the full question. What do you want to do, for your living, and what does it take to make that happen?

If being a camp nurse (whatever you specifically want to do) requires 2 years adult med/surg then that's what you should do in order to qualify for what you want to do.

Are you actually drawn to the allergy clinic or does it just seem more tolerable?

[Wave Watcher]

What about becoming a school nurse?

Happy school nurse right here! :-)

[icuRNmaggie, BSN, RN]

I would like to suggest that you join the Association of Camp Nurses and focus on that as a career. Summer will be here before we know it, start applying now. Take ENPC through your local ENA chapter. There is also something called PERLS for those who do peds and OEC, outdoor emergency care certification for those who do ski patrol. Be a certified swim instructor or surf technician (lifeguard). These are good skills to pay the bills.

Substitute school nurses are in high demand so work on that certification. Involvement in Special Olympics would be fun and be good for your resume as would work experience in a child and adolescent psychiatric unit as well as outpatient wrap around services for at risk children. Facilities for juvenile offenders need nurses for basic health care screening and medication administration. Pediatric homecare (trach, vent, PEG tube) services will train you and this will add to your skillset.

You probably wont get rich working at any of these positions. But you will grow and have a rich life. Best wishes, Maggie

[Emergent, RN]

Maybe you can reduce to part time at your med/surg job, and pick up more hours subbing for the school district. That way you can finish up your year in med/surg, just in case you want that on your resume. You can even stay Per Diem there after you quit to keep your foot in the door. I did that with a job once, and now I can put that I stayed there 2 years, even though I worked very few shifts after a year.

Quitting after 5 months, though, is sort of a bridge burner. I agree that it sounds like school nursing might suit you well. Then you can do camp nursing for part of your summer.

[morte, LPN, LVN]

i am wondering about a little depression from working nights....

[AnnieOaklyRN, BSN, RN, EMT-P]

------------------ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\

------------------ Is a quitter!

I too just realized I just HATED being and ER nurse, more than I hate going to the dentist! I would RATHER go to the dentist than work one hour in the ER as a nurse!

So, anyway, I quit, I quit the only nursing job I have ever had. I worked there starting as a new grad, tolerated it full time for about a year, part time for another year, before I went per diem and SPRINTED back to the ambulance where I work as a medic and love my job most days! I am not giving up on nursing though... I have, probably 10 or so applications cooking, and am hopeful that I will get at least one interview and maybe even a new nursing job.

Keep your chin up, life is too short to be miserable at work, so keep looking for a new job until you find one!

HPRN