Disrespected daily by residents

[b.randolph]

Hello,

I am a 20 year old black female working in a LTC. And ready to give up nursing all together. Almost daily I am called the n-word and other derogatory names by residents. I have had it. I don't know what else to do. These residents do not have dementia.

Any advice would be appreciated. Thankyou.

[P_RN, ADN, RN]

Resident doctors?????

Or nursing home residents with dementia?????

[gentlegiver, ASN, LPN, RN]

I believe she meant LTC residents. I pray daily that these attitudes towards people of different races will pass with this generation. In the mean time have you spoken to your supervisor? Many places will sit the offenders down and tell them this is not acceptable. Personally I would not give up on Nursing, I would dump this job and find a new one, that attitude is creating a hostile working environment for you and you do not have to put up with it. Good luck in you decision.

[TheCommuter, BSN, RN]

I would try other specialties before giving up nursing altogether.

I am a black female nurse who has spent plenty of time in LTC facilities in Texas, and yes, the 'N' word has been freely used by elderly residents and family members around here. However, none of these people own me, control me, or disturb me enough to walk away from my livelihood. I invested too much time, money, and effort to get into the nursing profession to leave due to name-calling and racial slurs.

You do have the right to call these people on their behaviors and demand that they stop.

[supra-cna]

I am sorry to hear that you have to endure their verbal insults. It sounds like more than one is doing this. Where do you live? These residents sound like that is all they know is to disrespect African Americans. In their generation growing up that is how they treated African Americans. You need to tell someone that this is happening. Usually Social Services will have a talk with the residents and tell them that this is unacceptable treatment of you. Not everyone is like that and don't give up on them. You have to develop a tough skin and let their insults bounce off you. Don't act like that hurt you, which they may, but don't let them get to you. I hope things get better.

[tyvin, BSN, RN]

Well really what I want to know is where in the world are you!

[carolmaccas66, BSN, RN]

Nothing will change until you either:

1) quit

2) start standing up for urself & telling people this behaviour is RACIST, UNACCEPTABLE and HIGHLY ILLEGAL.

And sorry, don't agree with the other poster. It doesn't matter how they were 'brought up'. Times have changed and they have to treat other people with respect, regardless of personal beliefs. And you should NOT be 'getting used' to any insults - if you try to ignore it, the person abusing you thinks they have 'won' (to use a crude word), and they will continue with this incredibly insulting behaviour.

Tell all this to people to their face. They will get annoyed and start spouting off whatever rubbish they believe to justify what they say, but keep your cool! Be polite & professional & point out that it is ILLEGAL to abuse anyone for any reason (ie: being gay), under occ health & safety laws. Remind them they are actually breaking the law, and so are ur managers if you report it to them & they do nothing about it.

Start carrying around a notepad and document all the times/days insults were said, who said them - all the pertinent information & keep complaining to ur nurse manager, with all the information written up.

The only way to deal with these insults is to face it up front, but do try to be professional and cool - though it must be very hard.

A friend of mine went through this one time, and she had to see the person who racially insulted her every day, but she did complain and was apologised to, though there were rumblings that she was making too much out of what was said (she was called a 'black native' - she is aboriginal) and that 'the natives were getting restless' cos she queried something from another manager.

Stand up for yourself!! You are a human being to and entitled to be treated with respect and compassion like anyone else!

Also tell people to their face that they can be take to civil court - and the facility would have to pay - for racial slanders, and they can be fined.

That should take the wind our of their sails!

But keep complaining and stay strong. I don't stand for any of that c**p now - though people still try to justify their behaviour - probly cos they get embarrassed at being such an idiot!

[GLORIAmunchkin72]

LTC without dementia? I find that a little unusual, but if you are being disrespected on a daily basis by a number of people then I would find a different facility or another job where you can practice your skills.

[handyrn]

I seriously have mixed feelings on this. I think it depends on the context. Are they asking someone for the N***** nurse to come help them? Or are they saying "Hey N*****! Come help me!" If they are being derogatory it is one thing, but if they are saying it because that is the only way they know to describe you to someone else it's another. Sometimes we have to think about the age of these people. My great grandma used to say N*****, then she would sometimes catch herself and say, "Oh, I forgot, we aren't supposed to call them that anymore." It was just really hard to get out of the habbit after 70 years.

I am wondering if any of us are any different? Someone in one of the above posts said something about being gay. Some people would condemn that writer because they are supposed to be called homosexuals, not gay. And what about calling a patient manic depressive instead of bipolar? Or what if your housekeeping department is actually now called the enviromental specialists? How long will it take to get the new words in your head? For some people it takes a while, especially if they have gotten used to it for years and years one way and all of the sudden it has changed.

Heck, I understand that people use descriptive words because they can be ignorant and just don't know any differently. I have been addressed as the fat one, the heavy set nurse, the one with the boy haircut, etc. And seriously, if I were in a predominantly black or mexican environment and they called me "honky," who really cares? To me, being called names means nothing, as long as it is not in a threatening or demeaning context.

So I guess I just think that unless it is said in the wrong context, who cares? Flame away!

[CrunchRN, ADN, RN]

That is ridiculous. In this day and age? I don't care how old you are if you are NOT demented their is no excuse. Your supervisors need to let them know that it is neither appropriate or acceptable and so do you.

I am really sorry. Please know that the majority are not like this even here in Texas.

[casi, ASN, RN]

I'd talk to management and see if they are willing to maybe set some boundaries with these patients. Otherwise I would start getting boundaries of my own.

Next time you get called a N----- I'd simply try saying, "I prefer if you call me b.randolph."

[TheCommuter, BSN, RN]

Are they asking someone for the N***** nurse to come help them? Or are they saying "Hey N*****! Come help me!" If they are being derogatory it is one thing, but if they are saying it because that is the only way they know to describe you to someone else it's another. Sometimes we have to think about the age of these people. My great grandma used to say N*****, then she would sometimes catch herself and say, "Oh, I forgot, we aren't supposed to call them that anymore." It was just really hard to get out of the habbit after 70 years.

With all due respect, I do not buy this explanation.

The 'polite' terms that were commonly used to describe African-American people several generations ago included 'negro,' 'colored,' 'black,' and so forth. Most folks who dropped the 'N'-bomb were purposely being anything but polite.