Dislike Everyone In My Cohort

Updated | Posted
by sadsacrum sadsacrum (New) New Student

Specializes in Nursing student.

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Not sure what to do at this point, but I really dislike people in my cohort. We've all been told time and time again that a solid study group is what you need to succeed and I just haven't been able to find a group that I click with. Either nobody does any substantial amount of work/ can't keep track of what assignments are due and wants everything explained to them- contributing absolutely nothing. Or just want to sit around and talk about non class-related topics in the precious little time we have. Or we will all agree to have a certain amount of reading done before a meeting and then no one will have done the assignment other than me. 

Fortunately, I've received 100% on every test/assignment in my classes so far so am doing OK without study buddies. But I'm worried about what's to come after first quarter. Anyone run into a similar problem?! Advice?! 

Meowmix398

Meowmix398

24 Posts

I rarely did study groups and I made it out just fine. Friends are a plus but not a necessity in a nursing program. Just keep doing what you are doing because it's working! Don't feel pressured to form study groups especially if you don't click with your peers.

Lalali

Lalali

3 Posts

I hate study groups huge waste of time , I literally ended up writing a complete study guide for a girl who was too lazy to do her own and she would pay me ! Never again 

0.9%NormalSarah, ADN, RN

Specializes in ICU. Has 3 years experience. 242 Posts

Study groups can often be a hindrance, they certainly were for me except when we’d get together to quiz each other right before a test.

Side note: keep your head down and do your own thing and don’t talk about what others are or are not doing in the program. There will be lots of that going on and I suggest you steer clear of it as much as possible. That includes who you like and dislike. I realize this is a forum and you’re looking for advice on one thing, just thought I’d toss that in there as that advice was gold for me and served me well.

Oemgee

Oemgee, RN

Has 9 years experience. 20 Posts

I personally get little to nothing out of study groups because they are contrary to the ways I learn best. The only time in two years of nursing school I’ve actually benefited from a study group was when I was struggling with ACLS drugs and rhythms. This is prior to 9 years of primarily cardiac nursing. ? In this instance I did get  together with a group including people that I’d been told “grow on you” (my response was “like a fungus?”) who were able to combine things in a way that helped.

As long as doing your own thing works for you, keep doing it. There’s no point in trying to do things a certain way that other people think they should be. You’ll be required to collaborate on group projects and clinicals enough throughout school to have quite enough interaction with your peers, who probably more than you want.

If something specific, in your clinical group for instance, is making you miserable speak to the teachers and see if you can switch it up. I HATED 90% of my 3rd semester group and their ***y, clicque-y dynamic but consoled myself that I could get out of it when we got through the semester. When they announced at the beginning of 4th semester that we’d be in the same groups I went to the instructor and told them I couldn’t do another semester like that and got moved. Generally instructors want you to succeed and will work with you to make it happen which includes sometimes navigating interpersonal issues.

TheIRN

TheIRN

Specializes in Nurse Anesthesia Critical Care. Has 9 years experience. 10 Posts

Sadsacrum,

I think your worry about next quarter should actually be what you are hoping for.  Those students will not make the grade if they are not putting in the effort.  Then you will be able to find new groups and the cream will naturally rise to the top.  Worse case they will realize they need to hammer down and become more focused in small groups.

Best

lilRN16

lilRN16, ASN, BSN, RN

Specializes in Psych/Med Surg/Ortho/Tele/Peds. Has 6 years experience. 79 Posts

If they aren't taking your exams, paying your tuition or sitting in front of the NCLEX for you when the time comes, who needs them?  I had a relatively solitary nursing school experience and it was better that way. May have been nice to have "friends" but that's not how the cookie crumbled...

Believe in yourself, you've gotten this far ~ you can do it!

JKL33

6,180 Posts

On 1/20/2022 at 12:05 AM, sadsacrum said:

We've all been told time and time again that a solid study group is what you need to succeed

Dumb.

What you need is the ability to process the material, learn it, know it and be able to apply it. That is all.

For some of us there is way too much drama and distraction in study groups. It's silly to think that having the opportunity to experience that is essential. It certainly isn't.

Crazy to hear that it sounds like some students are placed into these groups?? Ugh, I thought group projects were bad but assigned study groups sounds like it's own terrible circle of hell.

2BS Nurse, BSN

Has 9 years experience. 642 Posts

I did the majority of my studying independently at home. I need quiet to absorb information (with a cup of coffee or tea).

I did have a "study group" but it was mostly for social reasons. The academics came very easy for me, but the reality of the health care culture was burdensome. We were able to bounce frustrations off one another and I remain friends with these nurses today. With all of this being said. You need to prioritize your time in a way that works for you!

"I HATED 90% of my 3rd semester group and their ***y, clicque-y dynamic but consoled myself that I could get out of it when we got through the semester".

Sadly, this will not end after nursing school. It will continue on with most jobs you'll have in the future. Acquire some skills to manage this now. 

Edited by 2BS Nurse

Lalali

Lalali

3 Posts

6 hours ago, JKL33 said:

Dumb.

What you need is the ability to process the material, learn it, know it and be able to apply it. That is all.

For some of us there is way too much drama and distraction in study groups. It's silly to think that having the opportunity to experience that is essential. It certainly isn't.

Crazy to hear that it sounds like some students are placed into these groups?? Ugh, I thought group projects were bad but assigned study groups sounds like it's own terrible circle of hell.

So true , I had a woman in her 40s (nursing student) say little mean things to me here and there, exclude me from gatherings and belittle any accomplishments I had. The weird thing is I never had a conversation with her , never knew her, never hung out with her , literally nothing. The most I have ever said was good morning to her. Weird as hell! Skip the drama girl ! 

Honyebee

Honyebee, CNA

Specializes in Customer service. Has 1 years experience. 447 Posts

You aren't there to like people. It's good to be liked or to like somebody. If everything else failed, you're there to pass your classes and get your license. The nurses told me this. They had noticed my classmates that some of them were too good to get the patients ready for breakfast and assisted them during meals. I helped around. They were short-staffed. I didn't report to our instructor or CI that they were standing around.  It wasn't to impress people. If I didn't want to be somewhere but sit, I could stay with a virtual lab. However, you will encounter this in your workplace. It's a good practice how to tolerate people and be able to focus. I went through this. I didn't care really. You'll have patients. The last thing you don't want to be ruined is your focus. I know it's easy to say, but you can practice it. 

Edited by Honyebee
Grammar

CommunityRNBSN

CommunityRNBSN, BSN, RN

Specializes in Community health. Has 4 years experience. 773 Posts

I attended zero study groups in nursing school.  (For one thing, the students who wanted study groups tended to be the least bright.) I also made zero real friends, although I was friendly and got along well with almost everyone. Just do your work. Don’t talk bad about people or gossip to other students. Smile, help people who need it when you can, and be pleasant. Then you’ll graduate and move on.