Discouraged TPAPN Nurse

CrunchRN, ADN, RN · Jul 6, 2017

From what I have read from others in your situation you just have to keep trying and eventually you will find the right person/place that will hire you.

TexasNurse2014 · Jul 6, 2017

Thank you! I know it will happen. Sorry, I am just in my feelings, having a pitty party. HA!

Ash2213 · Jul 6, 2017

I am sorry you are having a hard time. I am also in TPAPN, just about halfway through. It keeps my humble and I hate that! But, I know it is what I need unfortunately. I worked for a terrible place for about 13 months when I first started. Terrible as in I was often afraid I would lose my license for the crazy safety issues, and I was working with pedis. Anyway, I stuck it out, prayed a lot, cried a lot, and tried to be grateful I had a job. I am now at another hospital, on the recommendation of another nurse I worked with at the bad place. The DON welcomed me with open arms, I even told her on the phone that prior to interviewing that I was a TPAPN nurse. I am so grateful now. I still hate TPAPN and all the tests and having to feel so shameful when I walk into the testing place 2 days in a row.

I am telling you this to give you a little hope, not to brag or boast. It is possible to find your place and I know that you will. Just hang in there. Do what you are supposed to do even when your entire being is rejecting it. I believe that is the key to making it. I fear every UA I take will be positive and I don't think that will go away until I am done. But, at the end of the day, I am sober, I know it, my family knows it, and I have to believe God has got me.

I wish you the best..hang in there.

catsmeow1972, BSN, RN · Jul 6, 2017

my first job, when saddled with this contract also was SCARY! in terms of safety issues. i wouldn't recommend that place to my worst enemy. They were consistently, dangerously short handed. They hired a number of monitoring program nurses, possibly because anyone able to work elsewhere would run for the hills. Honestly, I think they did me a favor when they made up some absurd garbage to use as an excuse to fire me (I tended to be very persistent in trying to shield my patients from some of the frightening things that went on there.

These programs do indeed set up up for discrimination, whether it is because of lack of knowledge or pre-conceived ideas of what this is supposed to be. Granted there are positions that really are just unable to accommodate the stipulations, but I should think that most of us would know better than to even apply for such things.

When i interviewed for my current (absolutely fantastic) job, when we got to the point where i was asked if i had any questions, i brought up the contract and the stipulations, The NM interviewing me said "pfffft...that's no big deal...and thank you for being so up front and honest about it. 2 days later i got an offer and after i navigated the program's efforts to burn my opportunity (Lord forbid, we get to succeed at something), I haven't looked back since.

Do not let the program scare you. Do what they tell you, play their little games and know that it will end eventually.

it's okay to vent. This is what this forum is for. Take a deep breath and know that there is something out there....

SNB1014, RN · Jul 6, 2017

When you say that TPAPN tried to burn your offer, what do you mean, exactly?

I have a job now in pre-op and PACU. PACU is a tempting place for me, but I know myself- as long as I "get away" with diversion once, I will become arrogant and reckless. So I have been able to avoid diversion for the last 6months. Doesn't sound like much, but it's the longest I've. Even able to hold a job and safely handle narcotics since I was "made aware" by 2 major employers in the area that I no longer had a position there because of my actions/lack of documentation/ overall suspicion.

Ironically, at both termination meetings with directors and HR, I was told I "could have come to them if I had a problem and they would recommend confidential TPAPN and make it work with me" bc I was such a intelligent RN. But now that they had to fire me for cause ( never proven, but they were correct), it was mandated that they report everything to the Texas BON.

I'm curious to hear what you were referring to. TIA!

TexasNurse2014 · Jul 6, 2017

Thank you all for the sweet replies. I know something will come up for me. My case manager just called me. She said that since I have been doing so well, she will lift my narcotic restrictions, to see if that will better help me find a job. Also she gave me permission to work in Private Duty/Home Health. Prayers and good vibes please !

Recovering_RN · Jul 7, 2017

My first job in TPAPN was home health. I'd never done it before and I didn't really like it, but hey, it was a job! And I was grateful for it! I'd been turned down many times before trying for the home health job. I now have a job that I love working in a free standing ER, but the home health job was the job where I was able to get through my narc restrictions so I really appreciated getting it. For home health, you will have to check in with your supervisor twice a day. Once can be on the phone, just a quick "hey I'm checking in(or out)", the second check-in had to be in person. The check-in had to be prior to seeing any patients and the checkout had to be after I was done seeing patients. I alternated whether my checkin was in person and check out was by phone or vice versa, based on where my patients were that day (in relation to my house and the office). My supervisor set up an agreement with 3 other people at the office who could accept my check-ins and check-outs, in case she was unavailable. They had to keep a paper log of all those daily check ins/outs and I would fax those in quarterly with my quarterly update paperwork. My biggest dissatisfaction with that system was that I felt it was a CONSTANT daily reminder that I was in TPAPN. When all my patients were close to my house, but I still had to drive the 15 miles to the office every day, for the in-person check-in/out, just to walk in and say "hey, I'm checking in (and see!? I'm not high)", I could never ever get away from feeling like a criminal! At my current job, I still of course do daily check-in with recovery trek, but as far as the work itself, I don't even remember I'm in TPAPN most of the time! BUT I was sooooo grateful for that home health job, because they were willing to take a chance on me when nobody else would.

Whew! Sorry so long. I didn't mean to go off on a rant. Try home health, it may be something you'll like. And it's not forever, just do whatever you have to to get through these 3 years!

Kooky Korky, BSN, RN · Jul 7, 2017

I am sorry you are having a hard time. I am also in TPAPN, just about halfway through. It keeps my humble and I hate that! But, I know it is what I need unfortunately. I worked for a terrible place for about 13 months when I first started. Terrible as in I was often afraid I would lose my license for the crazy safety issues, and I was working with pedis. Anyway, I stuck it out, prayed a lot, cried a lot, and tried to be grateful I had a job. I am now at another hospital, on the recommendation of another nurse I worked with at the bad place. The DON welcomed me with open arms, I even told her on the phone that prior to interviewing that I was a TPAPN nurse. I am so grateful now. I still hate TPAPN and all the tests and having to feel so shameful when I walk into the testing place 2 days in a row.
I am telling you this to give you a little hope, not to brag or boast. It is possible to find your place and I know that you will. Just hang in there. Do what you are supposed to do even when your entire being is rejecting it. I believe that is the key to making it. I fear every UA I take will be positive and I don't think that will go away until I am done. But, at the end of the day, I am sober, I know it, my family knows it, and I have to believe God has got me.
I wish you the best..hang in there.

Nothing to be ashamed of. We all fall short of perfection. Just keep on keeping on. You, too, OP.

allnurses Guide · Jul 8, 2017

Hi ya'll ! I've been enrolled into TPAPN since September 2016. TPAPN is the Peer Assistance Program for Nurses in Texas. I just reached two years of clean time last month.
I have become so discouraged about finding a job. I know something will come up for me.
Last month I had a great interview. Disclosed all of my information to the lady that was interviewing me (she was not the DON) . She was very hopeful and proud of what I have overcome. She said she recommended me for the job. It was for a treatment nurse position (how perfect would that have been)! Anyway. I go through background screen and HR says they can't hire me because the new Administrator and DON won't hire TPAPN nurses with stips on their license. It's just frustrating. I know this program is not meant to discriminate but sometimes I feel like it does. I also believe that some of these nurses don't have a clue about TPAPN and what it entails, that they just don't want to bother with it.
Sorry for rambling. Just needed to get it off my chest.

Just giving you a shout out of support - I really can't speak to the difficulty of finding a job while in diversion/supervision due to the fact that I got the first job I went after. It was a psych position and they were happy to have me - I have now been working for them off and on for 15 years. They are trying to get me to consider a supervisory position but I am MHNP bound at this point. When the right job is meant to be it will happen. You don't say if you are on the OIG exclusion list. That can really complicate things. I would focus on Dialysis, psych and alcohol and drug recovery centers. They seem to be the most forgiving and open to hire us.

Good luck to you

Hppy

catsmeow1972, BSN, RN · Jul 8, 2017

When you say that TPAPN tried to burn your offer, what do you mean, exactly?
I'm curious to hear what you were referring to. TIA!

Mine is actually another state, but i think these programs all run basically the same way. What happened was that when Job A (the scary one) fired me, (their reasons were absurd and rather hilarious. i actually laughed at them while i was refusing to sign the paper that listed all of my alleged "sins." Anyway, I did what I was supposed to do and reported it immediately.

I promptly jumped back into the job market and quickly found an identical position (Job B) at a much bigger, much better respected facility. The job description was precisely the same. All of a sudden, the CM claimed there were stipulations in the contract that there were not, and she told my almost-new supervisor that. I chucked a lawyer at them, not to get out of the contract (which, at least for me, is total BS, but nonetheless i did sign it, and if i had only known...) but to hold them to the same adherence that i was subject to.

So the original offer went down in flames but the hospital was interested enough in having me that we searched out another position that would suit the programs stupidity and after interviewing for that, i had a job. Granted it is not the specialty that I've spent my entire career in, but no thanks to the program idiots, it has been a very good experience and a place that i plan to stay for the long haul.

TKsprivatenurse · Jul 10, 2017

I think I got EXTREMELY lucky. My very first interview was for an LTAC hospital. When I told the DON about TPAPN she said "That won't be a problem" and gave me a hug! Of course, I took the job pretty much on the spot and she insisted that I work in the ICU area, but I told her I don't think they will let me. She called my case manager and asked. My case manager said it would be fine, and nearly 3 years later I am still at the same job and loving everyone that works there as my own family. EVERYONE was supportive and encouraging although I will admit at around the 5 and 6 month mark of others pulling my narcotics for me they were all kind of starting to get annoyed. I was sooooo happy when I could pull my own damn narcotics!