*Desperately need some advice - I hate my new job*

[shellybean]

I apologize in advance, this is a long one - but I would really appreciate some advise from anyone who might be able to offer it. I am a new nurse. Before graduating from school I was working as a nurse tech on a specialty floor that I knew I wanted a career in. I was offered a position and I was thrilled beyond belief! Unfortunately after many long sleepless nights of talking, my husband and I agreed he would accept a position out of state that was his dream job. After all - he supported me through four LONG years full of tears, crying, stress, tests and clinicals - I could allow him to follow his dream now, right? I am a nurse - I can get a job anywhere. So I sadly declined, and had to put in my notice. My manager was great about it - she told me if we ever moved back I would always have a job there.

Well - long story short - we moved back. I called when we made the decision to move back - only to find out they had just hired 3 nurses a couple weeks before. There were no open positions. She said to keep checking the open positions posted on line and apply as soon as one came up, and that one would be opening very soon. I kept checking - but there was nothing. Finally after a few weeks I needed to work and the nurse recruiter found a position for me that she said would be great. I applied - had a series of 4 interviews and got the position. Now - during all my interviews I was asked why I was not going back to my original floor. I was very honest and said it was because there were no openings - I explained that is my passion and where I see my career going...

So now here I am today. I had my first day on the floor yesterday. I have never had to leave a patients room to vomit. Before yesterday. It was terrible. I nearly lost it 4 times and the last time did it. Please let me say I know how blessed I am to have a job. So many do not... but I did no go to school for a "job", I went for a career. I hate the floor I was hired on to. The staff is great. The manager is incredible. The unit however - is the worst I have ever been on. It could not be any further from where I want to be. I hate every minute of it. I left in tears. I cried all night. My eyes are welling right now thinking about it. I just don't know what to do. I know the patients here need and deserve kind and compassionate care - not someone who vomits while providing care they desperately need. It's pretty obvious to me I am just not the right person for this job. I am getting sick just thinking of what I saw and had to do today. I hate it. So much. I don't know how I am going to be able to get through 6 months of this so I can transfer within the hospital.

I ran into my old manager today... she asked my why I never applied to the TWO positions that were posted for her floor!! I told her I checked every day and it was never posted. She went and checked on her computer and sure enough - there were 2 positions posted - but they were only posted internally even though it was supposed to be posted to the public as well. I started to cry. All I want is to go back there - and stay there! Even though our hospital has a '6 month period before you can transfer' policy, she told me to apply anyway, call the nurse recruiter and explain how I feel (this area is my passion, and where my future is headed) and also to have her call her so they could talk. She said it probably won't change anything - but she is willing to try.

Has anyone gone through something like this? Has anyone been able to change floors right after being hired in? I am imagining the worst - if I am unable to move - I am going to have to stay on this floor and my manager will probably hate me after all this. It came down to me and 2 other RN's and they offered the position to me. If this blows up in my face it could make the next six months even worse than it will be now. Should I just start applying to other hospitals and leave the one I'm at? I can't imagine they would rather lose an employee than let them transfer, but I know rules are rules. Any thoughts?

Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

[meanmaryjean, DNP, RN]

I'm just a little curious about how you could make this decision after only ONE day on the floor? Did I read that right?

Also curious about what type of floor both the 'dream' and the 'nightmare' is?

I suspect you are obligated to stick out the six months in order to remain a viable candidate for the dream job down the road.

[Mulan]

What kind of a floor are you working on?

I'm guessing you were working in some area of women's health?

[RNJill]

First of all, I'm really sorry about your whole ordeal and your terrible first day. But I'm wondering if it might be wise to give the new floor (the one that is not your dream floor) a little more time. I can say from experience that working with great people and a great manager makes SUCH a huge difference to your overall satisfaction and even potentially your ability to advance...so if the PEOPLE on this undesirable unit are great, don't be too quick to discount that. Also, if the day was terrible because of your patient assignment, see how things evolve over time. I remember some days of my orientation that were so bad (related mostly to patients/busyness of that particular assignment/etc) that I could have run screaming into the night and I know that I oriented people on similar days, but overall, my days are not like this. Again, I obviously don't know the whole situation, but I would hate to see you make a too-hasty decision.

[hiddencatRN, BSN, RN]

I cried after my first day on the floor as a new nurse and then went on to love working there. I think you should give it the 6 months hospital policy requires.

[CrunchRN, ADN, RN]

Almost everybody wants to throw up there 1st days as a nurse.....

[Altra, BSN, RN]

Did you work as a nurse while you & your husband had relocated? If so, that was not the *dream* unit with the *dream* manager, right? And yet you got through it.

While I cannot possibly know whether or not strings will be pulled or rules will be bent to allow you to transfer to your desired unit quickly, I can confidently tell you one thing: you WILL be miserable every day that you work if you don't emotionally detach yourself from the dream and engage yourself fully in the work you're doing right now.

And consider this, too: over time, people, unit structures, patient populations and hospital priorities evolve. The *dream* unit today may very well not be the dream unit 10 years from now. If your job satisfaction comes 100% from external factors ... you may find yourself perpetually or perennially dissatisfied.

Good luck to you.

[meanmaryjean, DNP, RN]

>

Profound! And, let me tell you, after 35 years in the profession, so very, very true!

[CrunchRN, ADN, RN]

Also, I would honestly just suck it up and learn all I could because that will help you in the future in ways you cannot even conceive of now. Just keep it in your head that it is temporary. You can tolerate a lot when you know it is not forever.

[netglow, ASN, RN]

How long ago did you work on your fav unit, 2-3 years ago? Well, a lot can change and you never know what things are like there now, could be something totally different and here you are betting the world on that old unit. If you read AN a while, you'll eventually read of people pining away to work at a certain hospital, and finally getting there and regretting it. I remember a specific phone convo I had a while ago where someone I know left what was considered by many a rotten hospital, to go to one with a better patient demo, and nicer digs, etc. and turns out it was way worse - a totally different kind of badness. A very confident person totally torn apart in her first week - ugh.

If your management and co workers where you are now are great, sheesh, these days thats all anybody wants. That there is gold!

[martymoose, BSN, RN]

yep, things change- my floor used to be exclusively post cardiac pts, now its got dopeheads, etoh's, psych, dementia, nursing home.... heaven forbid that the company leaves any bed empty:-(

Sorry this happened to you. maybe something will turn up someday.

[klone, MSN, RN]

I think you have your heart so set on the "dream job" that you're not allowing yourself to appreciate what you can learn in your current job. I'm going to guess, based on your level of emotion, that your "dream job" is in OB and your current job is M/S. Am I close? Your current coworkers and manager are really nice, you said. Right there, you are SO fortunate to have that. My advice is to suck it up, change your attitude and decide that you will make the best of a less-than-ideal situation and learn everything you can in your current job, and wait out the six months or however long it will take before you can transfer.