i have been taking 100mg zoloft for over 6 years now, i suffered major depression after having a cabg 8 years ago. i too didn't want to take some pill to make me feel better, but the day that i snapped at my only child that was only 3 years old, i knew then that i had to take my zoloft no matter what.
my daughter deserves a mother that is kind, compassionate and loving, not a mixed up woman that screams and yells for stupid things , life is too short and sweet for that.
i can tell you i feel so much better wheni take my meds. i have come to accept that i have to take antidepressant just like i have to take bp, heart and asa on a daily basis.
i know longer care what people say or think when they find out i take zoloft, what i do care about is being kind of wife, mother and friend that my family deserves.
i so understand how you feel, but know that you are not alone in this!!
Specializes in obstetrics(high risk antepartum, L/D,etc.
I. too, have depression. I've probably been depressed since childhood. I had a dear NM who took me into her office and asked me to get help. She knew me well and realized that I was at the bottom of a big black abyss that was sucking me deeper. She actually saved my life. In every respect.
Please don't think there is something "wrong" with you. Let something be right with you by seeing someone, by getting on antidepressant medication (I use prozac) and do not be ashamed to see a therapist. Without therapy, you stay in that vortex. I'm not sure what majic happens in the therapist's office, I just know it happens, and that I am forever grateful to that NM.
I take 40mg Celexa every day to keep my brain chemicals evened out.
Dont feel bad or ashamed. Do you tell a diabetic its their fault for not making insulin? Its not a depressed persons fault for not having enough seretonin in their brain.
I denied being depressed for almost 8 months of my beautiful daughters life, I knew I wasn't right but felt I would be giving in to ask for help. It is such a lonely and desperate place to be, noone understands you, I felt like I was just flat I had no enthusiasm or interest in things going on around me. It was an effort to talk to anyone because I was so lethargic. I hated everyone and I hated being me.
It was only when I snapped I had it pointed out I needed to get some help, my car was hit in a car park and the person who hit it was a little obnoxious shouting at me, I had my daughter screaming, this person shouting at me because I asked for insurance details when there was no damage so I hit them, I am not a violent person but I could think of no other way of shutting them up. A police officer was called and spent about an hour talking to me whilst I broke down. He insisted that I go to the doctors and he came back a week later to make sure I had.
I told my GP who was brilliant and got me onto medication which literally got me out of that horrible darkness
Please ask for help and accept it, it will make such a difference to your quality of life.
18 years. More than half my 28 years of being alive. I refuse to feel any shame that I have major depression and generalised anxiety disorder. Instead I take pride in the fact I manage my illness well and that now I have help and the right medication most people would never know.
Depression can take you to hell and back and you can lose so much to it, but it can be managed and some overcome it completely. I believe living with depression is like living with any illness - you have good days and bad. And for all that I have lost to this illness I believe without a doubt that it has helped me to become the person I am, and I like that person.
Please get help. You are not alone. I have tendencies towards it as a result of my ADD. The darkest days of my life were when I was depressed as a result of a bullying boss. I struggle each and every day in my search for recovery.
I have been battling this the day I became pregnant with my second child. I was on Wellbutrin XL and after she was born I was diagnosed with postpartum depression. I refused treatment until about a month before she turned two. I was yelling and screamning at the kids for God knows what..if they sneezed wrong I was yelling...How awful was that? My marriage was on the rocks but I will admit, he was there through all of the kicking , cussing and screaming. I know it was hard on him, but he was there. I was finally pushed to seek help.
I come from a christian background, but some of my family can be very judgemental. I told my mother about my problem and she just let me have it..which I can understand her being upset wondering where did my faith in the Lord go? Somethings just cannot be explained and this is one of them. She suffered from depression when she was first diagnosed with kidney failure and was put on dialysis. She could not hide that from a person who loves anything that has to do with care and health.
I love my life and I want it back..I don't want some monster ruling me!!!
This monster has rulled me since middle school. Of course I have the sneaky depression. I am bipolar 2 so I will be ok and BAMM the monkey jumps on my back. I currently take 1200 mg Lithium and 225mg Effexor daily. This mostly keeps the mosnter at a low humm instead of a raging scream and works out ok. Luckily for me my bosses daughter is a rapid cycling Beeper also (BP1) so she is very understanding of occasional needs for a week off.
This monkey will never go away. My mom's preacher told me praying would make it go away ROFL so I told him, if there was a God he needed a QA department because he dropped the ball on my brain and it needs to be recalled!!! :chuckle
Depression sucks, but oh the hypomania makes it all worth it.
I have been battling this the day I became pregnant with my second child. I was on Wellbutrin XL and after she was born I was diagnosed with postpartum depression. I refused treatment until about a month before she turned two. I was yelling and screamning at the kids for God knows what..if they sneezed wrong I was yelling...How awful was that? My marriage was on the rocks but I will admit, he was there through all of the kicking , cussing and screaming. I know it was hard on him, but he was there. I was finally pushed to seek help.
I come from a christian background, but some of my family can be very judgemental. I told my mother about my problem and she just let me have it..which I can understand her being upset wondering where did my faith in the Lord go? Somethings just cannot be explained and this is one of them. She suffered from depression when she was first diagnosed with kidney failure and was put on dialysis. She could not hide that from a person who loves anything that has to do with care and health.
I love my life and I want it back..I don't want some monster ruling me!!!
Okay...I have to say something about Mom "letting you have it" for having confided your experiencing depression. It sounded to me as if there were an implication in there somewhere that we 'have' to suffer. Why would depression have to be suffered differently than a ruptured appendix or a broken bone? There are highly effective clinical treatments for all of the aforementioned. So by what logic could anyone conclude that a person is somehow lacking in mental/spiritual/moral fortitude for not just suffering "gracefully" (i.e. stoically - in silence) through their depression rather than seek treatment?
Humans have to make efforts on their own behalves to help themselves. Keep the faith - but pray to be shown the way to whatever will help you heal. Your mom has loving intentions - she believes you to be a strong woman, of strong faith, that she raised you to be. But do NOT make the mistake of thinking that means suffering alone in silence (as I fear she and tens of thousands of others have/do).
Depression is highly treatable. You will "get your life back" provided that you commit to actively seeking out treatment options and sticking with the one(s) that you and your healthcare provider together decide are most appropriate for you.
Okay...I have to say something about Mom "letting you have it" for having confided your experiencing depression. It sounded to me as if there were an implication in there somewhere that we 'have' to suffer. Why would depression have to be suffered differently than a ruptured appendix or a broken bone? There are highly effective clinical treatments for all of the aforementioned. So by what logic could anyone conclude that a person is somehow lacking in mental/spiritual/moral fortitude for not just suffering "gracefully" (i.e. stoically - in silence) through their depression rather than seek treatment?
Humans have to make efforts on their own behalves to help themselves. Keep the faith - but pray to be shown the way to whatever will help you heal. Your mom has loving intentions - she believes you to be a strong woman, of strong faith, that she raised you to be. But do NOT make the mistake of thinking that means suffering alone in silence (as I fear she and tens of thousands of others have/do).
Depression is highly treatable. You will "get your life back" provided that you commit to actively seeking out treatment options and sticking with the one(s) that you and your healthcare provider together decide are most appropriate for you.
I truly believe depression runs in famililes. My grandfather was depressed and an alcoholic. My mother was depressed and an alcoholic. I have depression. My son has depression and alcoholic tendencies. My daughter has depression, and possibly a little something more going on, but she refuses to bring it up to the doctor. The only reason she is on medication is her doc gave her an old school antidepressant (Pamelor), telling her it would help her sleep at night and reduce her number of headaches. And believe me, we can TELL when she doesn't take her meds.
And I am right there with the rest of these posters, OP, please go to your doc and get some medication. I take Effexor XR 225 mg a day, and it has made a world of difference in how I feel. I enjoy life, my moods are not clear off the chart in one direction or the other. I am so thankful for my meds!!!!!
Lorie P.
755 Posts
:heartbeathugs to you and for sharing.
i have been taking 100mg zoloft for over 6 years now, i suffered major depression after having a cabg 8 years ago. i too didn't want to take some pill to make me feel better, but the day that i snapped at my only child that was only 3 years old, i knew then that i had to take my zoloft no matter what.
my daughter deserves a mother that is kind, compassionate and loving, not a mixed up woman that screams and yells for stupid things , life is too short and sweet for that.
i can tell you i feel so much better wheni take my meds. i have come to accept that i have to take antidepressant just like i have to take bp, heart and asa on a daily basis.
i know longer care what people say or think when they find out i take zoloft, what i do care about is being kind of wife, mother and friend that my family deserves.
i so understand how you feel, but know that you are not alone in this!!
take care !