Dealing with nasty OB

Specialties Ob/Gyn

Published

Specializes in Med-Surg.

Hi all.

I am in my fifth week of orientation and have come across the nightmare OB of the unit. She is known by all to be rude, unprofessional and condenscending to all staff. Of course I have the priviledge of crossing paths and on two separate occasions she has been rude. It is obvious she does it for pleasure. I will give an example: Her c/s was scheduled for 1245, she knew I was being oriented (my preceptor told her we will be a little while with admission) We get done the admission, and are in the OR (of course OB wanted to start early to be spiteful) at 1215 and an emergency case is called for next door. Our case was held due to having only one anesthesiologist available. OB states well we would have been in here at 1200 but the shave and foley took awhile. My preceptor says "no, we were waiting for anesthesiology she was like not uh. Then she watches as I am pouring water for the OR tech saying what when I called out the date...(none of her business of course) and there is one other incident along the same lines. I haven't done anything wrong and am trying to learn my job...however, was told by many staff to 'put her in her place' and then she will leave me alone.. Any suggestions of what I should say? I think I will have to work with her again tomorrow unfortunately.....

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Specializes in L&D, OR, Med/Surg.

I had a similiar situation when I first started in OB, and I got lots of advice on how to deal with "the nasty OB". Everything from ignoring him to telling him off. Well, here is how I handled the situation...

One day right after a delivery he was being his normal grouch self and complaining about things (and I had done everything 100% correctly). He was sitting at the nurses station making his delivery notes, right as he finished, and I very calmly requested that he come back to the work room because I had something important to talk to him about. Of course he didn't say no because there were many people who witnessed me, very professionally, make the request.

When we got back to the work room I said to him..."I wanted to speak to you away from the nurses station because I need to let you know that I do not appreciate the way you speak to me" The very first thing he said to me was, "I don't speak to you any differently than I do any other nurse." I then proceeded to tell him that I was only talking about the way he speaks to me as I can only speak for myself. I also let him know that "I consider myself to be an intelligent and hardworking person, and I'm giving 100% trying to be the best nurse possible and he was making it difficult by undermining my best efforts" Surprisingly he said "I don't mean to do that, and I didn't realize I was" He then proceeded to apologize (believe it or not). Literally, from that point on, things started to improve.

It is almost four years later, and this physician and I have a great working relationship! It is really tough to make the first step in standing up for yourself, but in the end, it will earn you the respect you deserve!! :D

Never EVER be afraid to stand up for yourself!! Noone should have to put up this kind of behavior in the workplace! Good luck!!

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Specializes in Emergency.

I am sorry.

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Specializes in ob/gyn med /surg.

laborlovinRN gave great advice.. why not be upfront with your feelings and let her know what a nasty ob she is?

please keep us posted on how the situation plays out.. i am sending good thoughts your way

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Specializes in Med/Surge, Psych, LTC, Home Health.

I'd like to give you some good advice, however I too have a horrible time dealing with docs who are like this. I'm inclined just to say, continue to be professional and straightforward in all of your dealings and conversation with this person. Learn to recognize when their behavior is inappropriate and take them aside and ask them to please speak to you with respect and treat you in a way that you would want to be treated.

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I am inclined to agree with the others who advised you to " put her in her place". I have come across many bullies, and nine times out of ten, if I quietly let them know that I am NOT intimidated by their behavior, they treat me with respect.

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Many hospitals have an "abusive physician policy." Check if your's does and if this falls into the category. I know mine does and we had a new doc trying to see how far he could push things. Our nursing director and chief OB doc put a stop to it rather quickly. We are educated professionals and deserve to be treated as such. I agree with the nurses that say "put her in her place" It can be done rather easily, just preferably not in front of a patient. Next time she's out of line just tell her so.

Of course there is always the passive aggressive repeated 3 am phone calls to her to ask for things like Maalox or to tell her her laboring pt just srom'd or something simple like that. :wink2: But "putting her in her place" would probably be easier.:chuckle

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Specializes in ICU/Critical Care.

Sometimes I think humility goes a long way. Usually if a resident or doc tries to correct me or tell me how to do my job in a rude manner, I let them know right then that I don't appreciate being talked to like that.

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Specializes in Maternal - Child Health.
I had a similiar situation when I first started in OB, and I got lots of advice on how to deal with "the nasty OB". Everything from ignoring him to telling him off. Well, here is how I handled the situation...

One day right after a delivery he was being his normal grouch self and complaining about things (and I had done everything 100% correctly). He was sitting at the nurses station making his delivery notes, right as he finished, and I very calmly requested that he come back to the work room because I had something important to talk to him about. Of course he didn't say no because there were many people who witnessed me, very professionally, make the request.

When we got back to the work room I said to him..."I wanted to speak to you away from the nurses station because I need to let you know that I do not appreciate the way you speak to me" The very first thing he said to me was, "I don't speak to you any differently than I do any other nurse." I then proceeded to tell him that I was only talking about the way he speaks to me as I can only speak for myself. I also let him know that "I consider myself to be an intelligent and hardworking person, and I'm giving 100% trying to be the best nurse possible and he was making it difficult by undermining my best efforts" Surprisingly he said "I don't mean to do that, and I didn't realize I was" He then proceeded to apologize (believe it or not). Literally, from that point on, things started to improve.

It is almost four years later, and this physician and I have a great working relationship! It is really tough to make the first step in standing up for yourself, but in the end, it will earn you the respect you deserve!! :D

Never EVER be afraid to stand up for yourself!! Noone should have to put up this kind of behavior in the workplace! Good luck!!

If I could have thanked you 1000 times for this post, I would have. It is the best advice I have come across in years. No passive aggressive stuff, no whining, no tattling, no "firing back", nothing that compromises patient care or professionalism, just good advice!

Thank you!

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Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

Excellent advice offered. Be straight forward and speak privately like said above. It will go a long way toward building mutual respect and a better working relationship between you. If the physician (or any ) is disruptive, you have a complaint for management and administration. But I always recommend talking like adults first.

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I like the above posts. You will find coworkers like this in every part of nursing. However you decide to go about it, you need to deal with this doc because there are always more where they come from.

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Specializes in Med-Surg.

Thank you all for your support.

LaborlovingRN, I do agree that I need to do this....I also admit I am afraid but can't let this go on...I think I will wait until I come across her again and then hopefully muster up the courage to do it. She is such a loud mouth and I am afraid she will just try to embarrass me when try to address her.....I am a little wimpy...not pushover but just don't want to get teary or stutter... I will keep you all posted. Thanks for your replies!! (oh please ignore two spelling errors in my first post!!)

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