Confused, Mad and Frustrated


I don't know if this will make any sense but I will try to be as clear as possible.

I have posted numeous times in the past about my current job as an Administrative Assistant. I have been in this role for approx 20 years with various organizations, and the last 8 years working for a sales department. I worked for a beverage company for 6 years and tried to move into sales but was overlooked even though I exceeded in my role. Okay, so I moved on to a small baking company in the admin role, however expressed my career goals during the interview. They seem very receptive and I thought I would really have the opportuntity once I proved myself.

After 1 year with the new company I realized I jumped from the frying pan into the fire. It was the good ole boy club. I noticed no diversity, only 3 women among 100 sales positions, possibly 1% of minorities. Okay, I overlooked and tried not to get discouraged, well it's 3 years later and I would not be any closer to sales role than I was when I first stepped through the door, although I get exemplary job performance reviews. However, when I ask what can I do to get closer to my goal, they are very vague.

Okay, so last year I said I'm done, I can't do this admin thing anymore. I did a lot of soul searching and decided to pursue a Nursing degree, and started taking pre-reqs last summer. So I have coasting along, taking classes at night, doing my job during the day which have been difficult. I really am burned out and it's a daily task to keep myself motivated at work but I try to keep my eye on the prize.

Anyway, I had my yearly review yesterday and again, I got a great review, however, my manager say's "we love you, you do a great job for us but for 2009 we need you to take a more leadership role, take on projects, show more initiative" Once again very vague with no guidance. Last year when I suggested going out in the market with some of the front line delivery men, which would align with my career abjectives, my manager discouraged me from doing so, said he didn't see me doing it, didn't think I would be happy and how it would be hard for me as a single mother because I have to work very early hours. Whatever.... again that's when I said I'm done.

Anyway, back to yesterday.... after this brief conversation another of my male managers asked to take me to lunch to go over a few things. Great! maybe I could get some clarity.... Again... he reiterates, how they love me and I exceed my work performance, but they want me to step out of the box, blah, blah, blah... i asked " what do you have in mind, is there something specific you would like for me to take on? His reply is maybe you could take your CURRENT role to the next level, for example, since you pay the bills, maybe you can shop around for more competive pricing in regards to supplys and cleaning services. You can present to management the cost savings at the end of the year. I'm thinking " this is something I already do, even thought I have not made a formal presentation about it". He's say's "this is just a suggestion, maybe there is something else you can do to standout. Whatever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The more I thought about this meeting the madder I got. They want me to find a way to take my job to the next level by finding more creative ways of "shuffling paper". I DON'T WANT TO DO ANY MORE ADMIN WORK!!!! I am done, already. I understand what they are trying to say... from a company's perspective, but I am totally burned out and mentally cannot and don't want to give them anymore than what is necessary to do my job and get paid, finish school and move on. So now I am worried, they are going to be watching me more closely.

I think it's really time to move on, get my CNA license and work in TLC until I complete nursing school. I will be applying for fall of next year and hoped to stay with this job until then, but now I am not sure. I am already stressed with full time work, 2 classes at night and taking care of my daughter. I cannot endure anymore stress especially from work.

My main concern is paying the bills, CNA will be a substantial pay cut and I am not sure I can make do with that salary. Maybe I should take out a home equity, pay off the car and credit card and work as a CNA. I have been tossing around that idea for about a year. I just can't do this anymore, I have shifted my focus on nursing.

I am not sure if I am overreacting or my perspective is skewed... should I stay or move on. Any suggestions would be helpful. :bluecry1: Sorry for grammatical errors, it's late and I'm tired.

UM Review RN, ASN, RN

7 Articles; 5,163 Posts

Specializes in Utilization Management.

Personally, I'd keep this job going as long as possible while you go to school.

You are "taking it to the next level" -- in your personal life. No need to get mad that your manager doesn't know what you do, it's going to happen in nursing too.

I recommend repackaging the work you already do, but don't make any real changes. He'll be happy and you'll have the time and the funds to do what you want.

Specializes in Intensive, Maternity.

keep going, the ups and down not withstanding ultimately it will be worth it . for now continue where you are

Specializes in ICU. Has 13 years experience.

I agree with angie. CNA work is HARD work, and if you're going to take a pay cut, and the job that you have right now is not really that bad,, they only want you to make it "look" like you're doing more work. That doesn't mean you have to do more work. You said it yourself that you already do what he's suggesting,, but put the cost savings down in a graph or something... excel program..

Like, this is what we spent last year,,, this is what we spent this year , thanks to me! This is how much "I" saved this company.. Look at me, I am an asset!

Atleast you won't have to clean crap all day.


1 Article; 5,758 Posts

I can't help but wondering if that remark your manager made about "you not being able to handle it because of being a single mother". Could that be construed as being discriminatory. Would they say something like that to a man?


294 Posts

I can't help but wondering if that remark your manager made about "you not being able to handle it because of being a single mother". Could that be construed as being discriminatory. Would they say something like that to a man?

I would think so, honestly he has said worst things to me. However, I realize he is just ignorant and doesn't understand the seriousness of his remarks. My childcare issues are my concern not his, furthermore my daughter is 16 and pretty self sufficient. If it were an impossible task, I would not have suggested it. As I mentioned, this company needs a lot of diversification. Every person they hire on the sales team is someone they know. Usually it is an older man with 10+ years of sales experience.

Thank you for the replies. I understand CNA can be hard work but that doesn't bother me. At least I can get my feet wet in the health care industry while I am in school,especially if I can find work in the hospital. Also it will free up more time for me to study. Right now I work 5 8 hour days. As a CNA I could work 3 12's and the rest of the week study and attend class.

I will try to hold out another year, but when I get in Nursing school, I'm quitting. I will live off student loans if I have to. Unless they get rid of me before then.

Oh I forgot to mention that another baking company just aquired our company and they might be trying to look for ways to cut staff... who know's. The corporate culture sucks! If that is what they ultimately want to do, they need to let me go now, so i can move on with my life.


155 Posts

I know what you are going through. I have to stay at my job one more year before I am able to quit, and I am so burnt out also, it is very difficult to go in six days a week and still keep doing a great job. When I think about chucking it all, I just think that I am getting prepared for the future by saving as much money as I can so that when I am in school I will not have to stress about money. Trust me, ns is stressful enough without worrying about how you are going to pay bills. Good luck!


38,333 Posts

Since you say you are burned out, a vacation might be in order for your short term goal of maintaining your health. You will need every ounce of energy you can muster as time goes on in nursing school, so work on your health prevention strategies now. I would go with the status quo at work and not expend too much mental energy on it. Obtain your CNA certificate but don't worry about working as a CNA, unless you get laid off. CNA work is very strenuous and physical, as you will find out when you start. I worked as a CNA while in nursing school and found myself sleeping at every opportunity and always in a fatigue state. So, keep this job as long as possible, especially since it is better paying. Good luck.

Specializes in ED, ICU, MS/MT, PCU, CM, House Sup, Frontline mgr. Has 15 years experience.

op: your original post sounded very similar to what i went through in two career fields prior to nursing. i did the same things you mentioned and had enough after banging my head on the cement ceiling for years! i am not kidding ... i can picture the lunches, the conversations with management, the conversations about outstanding reviews, the suggestions i presented that were implemented... the waiting another year.... for another project.. for another position to open... etc. and watching people with less qualifications move ahead because he/she knew upper managers. yep, the thought of those days makes my stomach turn! on a brighter note those days are behind me and they now feel like a very bad dream! :rolleyes: you are making the right choice going into nursing.

as a new graduate nurse i have had opportunities fall into my lap (i am still getting used to these blessings) that as a non-nurse i would have had to beg for years to do! with that said, i suggest that you remain where you are at right now because of the money.

trust me, i was mentally and emotionally where you are at now… i worked in places that i hated every moment of every day because i too was done! similar to you, in order to get through my days at work i reminded myself of my goals. i had a post-it reminder on everything from my planner, computer, dash board in my car, books, wallet, etc. re-reading my goals during moments of anger or frustration got me through very bad times. quitting your job to be a cna will not help matters…. being a cna is not nursing. therefore the pay cut is not worth your time and effort right now.

doctor's, health care staff, nurses, patients, and families will treat you like you cannot think because your scope of practice does not require much thinking. the only time i suggest someone work as a cna before nursing school is if he/she has no choice. otherwise, wait until you start nursing school, then work part-time as a cna until you qualify to be a nurse extern.

as a cna you will hone technical skills. as a nurse extern you will learn how to think critically and practice the nurse’s role because it is within your scope of practice to see the big picture and implement nursing interventions accordingly under the guidance of your rn preceptor. gl!

Specializes in ED, ICU, MS/MT, PCU, CM, House Sup, Frontline mgr. Has 15 years experience.
i understand cna can be hard work but that doesn't bother me. at least i can get my feet wet in the health care industry while i am in school,especially if i can find work in the hospital. also it will free up more time for me to study. right now i work 5 8 hour days. as a cna i could work 3 12's and the rest of the week study and attend class.

ok, is it possible to take classes online? 5-8s will not be so bad if you finish online. if you can live with the cut in pay and the physical and emotional abuse while taking pre-reqs, then go for it.... i still stand by my original post and say that losing pay is not worth it right now.... getting into nursing school is tough... you can complete all of your pre-reqs and co-reqs and still have to wait years before starting first semester... in the mean time your pay is bad if you work as a cna not to mention the working conditions. being a tech is the worse job in the world! i do not know any other way to say that... i have had bad jobs, but they were bad in the sense that they, like your current one, were dead-end. those jobs were not physically and emotionally abusive on a day-to-day basis like being a tech. the pay and the treatment is ...... i have no words.:twocents:


294 Posts

I really appreciate the feedback. I think I will stay and endure it a little longer. I have been thinking of ways I can look more productive at work and keep a low profile for the next year.

Life is a *****! Sometimes I just want to give up :crying2:


1,975 Posts

I'm really proud of you. You see this job is usuing you and it's a dead end. Time to move on and you are. Now use this job like they've used you. All it is for now is a means to an end. Use it to pay your bills and stock away some money for nursing school. Keep taking your pre-reqs so you'll be ready to go full steam ahead in NS. This job is no longer your carrer path so look at it as a paycheck and only a paycheck.

And the single mother comment could get them sued. It's out of line. If you don't want to take legal action just keep your head low and chuckle to yourself about how it will be a huge loss to them when you leave and a huge gain the nursing world when you join it.

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