CNA Commandments

[greeniebean]

Okay so for anyone who hasn't noticed, I'm big on the for fun threads.

Today a co worker and myself were talking to some new hires and starting cracking up at our own "commandments". Of course the new hires thought we were crazy, but hey they'll see when they work the floor for awhile.

1-Thou shall not try to hide that pee ring on the sheet with a dry chuck to keep from stripping a bed.

2-Thou shall not then try to lie about said pee ring, when I find it.

3-Thou shall not keep a notebook of what the other CNA's are doing that bugs you...on you're 2nd day on the hall.

4-Thou shall not be a know-it-all.

5-Thou shall not leave Mrs. Smith on the toilet, forget about her, and then Lie and say she must have gone into the bathroom by herself. She has 1 leg. I doubt she walked in by herself.

6-Thou will NEVER eat food off a residents plate...especially a puree plate. EWWWWW!

7-Thou shall never gossip.

8-Thou shall always wash hands, lest ye want to give half the hall skin mites.

FuzzyWuzzy- I expect you to add something hilarious like you always do!

PS- Yes I've have encountered all of these things.

[RN2o1o]

Thou shall not hide in a resident's room pretending to do care when trays are coming out.

Thou shall not walk in the hall talking on your cellphone.

Thou shall not stand there talking while trays are being passed.

Thou shalll not get missing for 20 minutes and come back and say you are taking your lunch break.

[greeniebean]

Thou shall not hide in a resident's room pretending to do care when trays are coming out.

I second that!!

[fuzzywuzzy, CNA]

Do not just throw a new pad under someone who's been incontinent. Most of these girls have little kids at home- I wonder if that's how they change their babies' diapers... probably not. It won't kill you to grab a washcloth and wipe the urine off their skin!

[CandyGyrl1985]

thou shall not eat off the residents trays! :stone

thou shall not fake the vital sign sheet. this is somebody's life you are charting - use common sense and take the vitals! :angryfire

thou shall not hide when you see me walking down the hall, because you know i need help with a lift. what is this road runner and the coyote - come on! :trout:

thou shall not flirt with the residents - ever! (yes, i have seen 2 cnas do this so far- way unprofessional and repulsive oh and did i mention sick - its your patient - not your boyfriend!)

thou shall not turn on your favorite tv show in all of your residents room - so no matter where you go - its on! :hlk:

thou shall never hide the residents remote so you can keep said show on :sofahider

thou shall always give the resident the call light - even if its the patient - that yells " hey you! lady! you lady! i need help! help me! help! nurse!!! i need a nurse!!!! you there - nurse - come help me!" all night long! :hdvwl:

[ShantheRN, BSN, RN]

This might be one of the greatest threads I've read this week!

Thou shall not take over an hour lunch break, then get all butthurt when the nurse comments on how I'm doing the majority of the work and ready to tear my hair out.

Thou shall not act like a child and give coworkers the silent treatment when they call you out on your lack of work ethic.

Thou shall not call off "sick" on the days you know you've got a hard assignment.

Thou shall not complain about how we're always short staffed, yet call off for 25% of your own shifts. Seriously.

Thou shall not spend more time trying to figure out what I'm doing while your own assignment gets neglected.

Thou shall not correct me on my technique while I'm with a resident, simply because I haven't worked at my facility for 27 years like you have.

Thou shall not leave an incontinent patient lying on a chuck without a brief. How would you feel if you walked in and found your mother lying in a pool of her own urine and stool?

Thou shall not stay over for the next shift, then spend the next 8 hours whining about how tired you are. Either work and enjoy the overtime, or go home and leave me be!

Hmmm.....can you tell I need a vacation?

[Commanderzoom]

Thou shall not leave an incontinent patient lying on a chuck without a brief. How would you feel if you walked in and found your mother lying in a pool of her own urine and stool?

They used to make us do that because it cuts down on decubes. Think about it. If you're wearing a brief and are incontinent of urine and/or feces and can't be changed as soon as you go, it's going to be right on your skin and potentially cause some damage. If you're skin is open to the air and you're on a pad, you're less likely to have breakdown.

In the ideal world, this wouldn't be an issue because everyone would be changed immediately. In reality, that doesn't happen especially when you're working short-staffed because nobody wants to be a CNA and do hard work for low pay. I remember when all but maybe 4 of my 18 residents came down with C-Diff at the same and I was the only CNA on the hall. NOBODY got changed immediately after defecating because I haven't figured out to clone myself yet. I did the best I could, but they were all going every 10-15 minutes.

[ShantheRN, BSN, RN]

Oh, I know going sans briefs can be beneficial when dealing with frequent incontinence and pressure ulcers. This particular resident was lying in it - if she'd been wearing a brief, it would've been contained to just one part of her instead of her entire torso. The unit wasn't short staffed, and the resident's blankets were pulled up to her shoulders. She is usually combative and it's simply easier to take the lazy route. The first time it happened, I grumbled but didn't make a big deal. The second time, I was too disgusted to keep quiet. My nurse charted it and told the DON. I made a very detailed report of how feces was stuck to her arms and shoulders in the CNA book, and it didn't happen anymore.

Chucks keep the beds dry but do little to protect the person on top of them (at least the thin cheapy ones we have!). She has super absorbent briefs that would've kept the majority of the fluids away from her skin.

So really....I'm complaining about people who do this out of pure laziness :)

[CoffeemateCNA]

Thou shalt not feign forgetfulness when I point out to you during shift change that you have not emptied ANYONE's colostomy bags. I KNOW you were saving them all for ME to do.

Thou shalt not talk on the cell phone with your left hand while providing peri care to a resident with your right hand.

Thou shalt not hide in a resident's bathroom for an hour with said cell phone and text your boyfriend while I am busting my behind trying to answer call lights.

Thou shalt not go commando to work and then complain when your cheap scrub pants get ripped (true story).

Thou shalt not feign ignorance when I corner you about finding old dirty briefs in bed under the covers with the residents. The trash can is 2 feet away. USE IT.

Thou shalt not leave 3 pairs of underwear covered in C. diff stool in the hopper and "forget" about it until shift change and magically think that the oncoming shift would be glad to take care of it for you.

[annacnatorn]

thou shalt not stage a call out

thou shalt not take all the linnens..you hoarder

thou shalt not make friends with the Charge nurse so she can cover for you when you are late (makes the rest of us do your work, plus our)

thou shalt not fart in your patients room then blame the patient

thou shalt not leave dirty linens on a wheel chair that is turned away from sight

thou shalt not leave the electric hoyer lift uncharged

thou shall rinse the soap off of your patient

thou shall do your patients oral care....clean those ears to!

thou shalt not eat your patients candy..period

thou shalt not allow your male residents to see your boobies because they ask (sexual harrassment)

thou shalt not wear jeans to work n call them scrubs (we have a reputation to protect)

thou shalt not call off every friday

thou shalt not be on the cell phone when your are providing care

thou shall communicate with your patients, not ignore them

thou shalt not cuss at your patients

thou shall help your fellow cna, they help you

thou shall tend to your own potty needs in private, not announce that your have to pee at the top of your lungs or say damm, that poop felt good

thou shalt not discuss your fist fight with your boyfriend with your patients.

thou shalt not lie when charting

thou shall empty all colostomy and uriostomy bags

thou shall empty all folllie bags

thou shall clean the b/s table

thou shalt NOT sleep in your patients bed

thou shalt not steel linens...yuck

thou shalt not use the toilet in your patients rooms

thou shalt not eat your patients food

thou shalt not screams when doing PMC when the eyes roll or the lungs release air

thou shalt not tell a family member that he has one big.....(you fill in the blank with what ever you desire)

thou shalt never ever ever tell a family member that he/she is better off dead..you dummy.

keep them coming....this is cool

[NP Sam]

Thou shalt not name thyself the "senior" CNA on the hall and say because of that you never have to go to the dining room. That is why the supervisors came on the hall and warned you a couple of weeks ago :icon_roll. TRUE STORY

Thou shalt not refuse to switch sections on a hall because you are permanent.

Thou shalt not "act" like you don't have a bath to give on your shift. We actually had a resident meet the CNA at the timeclock the next day... good times:lol2:

Thou shalt give REPORT!!!!

Thou shalt not put clothes on a resident that you know belongs to another resident.

Thou shalt not say you didnt have time to lay a resident down when you and the rest of the CNAs are hiding in a residents room

Thou shalt not say you are going to take "mental health" break when you know you are gonna smoke! You said that really loud and you could get fired.

Thou shalt not take an hour dinner break! And I thought you would be smart enough to not take another CNA and the NURSE with you to Taco Bell and leave a new CNA on the hall by theirself. You guys were met by the supervisor when you came back and fired:(. And you guys were cool too

And just as a heads up...

Thou shalt not wear your nametag when you go to local restaurants on your break! Would you believe they will call your job? THEY DO

[CoffeemateCNA]

Thou shalt not put clothes on a resident that you know belongs to another resident.

That reminds me...

Thou shalt NOT put a t-shirt that says "World's Hottest Grandma" on a MALE resident and then play dumb when questioned about it! You KNOW he is not a hot grandma. And just because laundry puts something in their closet does NOT mean it belongs to them!

[Jen{NAR}]

Thou shalt not leave sticky poo on the back of the toilet seat and expect me to clean it up after you.

Thou shalt not put someone on a bed pan and not tell me that a person is on the bed pan, thus leaving me to find it 1-2 hours after you put that person on it.

Thou shalt let the residents know you care