Boyfriend of a Nursing Student

Published

I'm in a very committed relationship with a nursing student at a different school about a half an hour from me. We've been dating for a little over a year and both agree that marriage is in or future, I'm extremely proud of her for her career choice and try everything to be as supportive as I can from a distance but for the past few weeks I can't get one thing off my mind. I've seen the threads about a boyfriend being upset that his girlfriend has to touch or see another man's member among other things and that isn't what this is about, at first that thought and picture really bothered me but at this point I'm honestly over that and don't really care about it, I understand it's part of the job and I'm not concerned. I'm also not worried about her being turned on by inserting a catheter or giving a bed bath but the one thing that bothers me is how a nurse can have any interest in seeing her significant other naked after seeing several men naked that day at work, I know they are "just body parts" on patients but is it really different when it's your boyfriend or husband's? I know this question will probably seem dumb to everyone on here but as a management major who has no experience in the medical field it's hard for me to imagine that she won't eventually become desensitized to the male body and anatomy and develop the "seen one, seen them all" mentality. That would just really be hard because I know the way I look at her body and like to think that it goes both ways and I would just hate to lose that. Any advice would be appreciated, if you want to tell me how immature it is or to get over it then save your time, I realize it's small and probably largely unreasonable but I'm just looking to see how other couples or husbands have dealt with this if they've had the same problem or if it really isn't a problem then I would like to hear that too. Thanks in advance

I stated a fact.

What everyone else does with it is not my thang.

Specializes in Long Term Acute Care, TCU.
​*Recreational member-I would gladly pay to have her touch it*

Okay.....Whose recreational member would you pay to have her touch?:down:

What a valid question...thought that was self explanatory

Specializes in Long Term Acute Care, TCU.
What a valid question...thought that was self explanatory

Are we still talking about your GF?

Who is touching....and....who is getting paid?:unsure:

I think I'll cut my losses at this point and thank everyone for their input.

I bet it would make you feel better if you helped her study. Take a look at what she's learning. Maybe even take a look at the anatomy and physiology of a lady parts or the female reproductive system. Learn its structure, how it works, why certain things are where they are. If you do that, I think you'll see that it's not sexy. It's actually interesting stuff. You'll find that the picture, along with all those definitions and explanations, does not turn you on at all. You'll get a glimpse into what the view of the body looks like from a nursing standpoint.

Specializes in Behavioral Health.
I bet it would make you feel better if you helped her study. Take a look at what she's learning. Maybe even take a look at the anatomy and physiology of a lady parts or the female reproductive system. Learn its structure, how it works, why certain things are where they are. If you do that, I think you'll see that it's not sexy. It's actually interesting stuff. You'll find that the picture, along with all those definitions and explanations, does not turn you on at all. You'll get a glimpse into what the view of the body looks like from a nursing standpoint.

Not to mention you might learn a thing or two. I'm constantly amazed how many people don't even know the rough geography of female genitals - men and women. I mean, you don't necessarily need to know what Bartholin glands do, but I know people who don't even know which order the holes go in. It's like there's a cultural cloaking device over the whole area. If one more RN calls it a "hooha" I'm going to start pelting people with anatomical models.

ETA: ... he said, digressing.

Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
Not to mention you might learn a thing or two. I'm constantly amazed how many people don't even know the rough geography of female genitals - men and women. I mean, you don't necessarily need to know what Bartholin glands do, but I know people who don't even know which order the holes go in. It's like there's a cultural cloaking device over the whole area. If one more RN calls it a "hooha" I'm going to start pelting people with anatomical models.

ETA: ... he said, digressing.

LOL! :D

That does sound like a good idea, I enjoy helping her study anytime I can and I appreciate the advice. But I'm really not worried about her finding a patient sexy but concerned about all of it changing the way she thinks about me or to lose intimacy because of it, if that makes any sense. While I know it's probably not reasonable I was just wondering if anyone encountered this but now I'm realizing that I was wrong and just had a hard time thinking about it from a medical perspective.

And yes, I could absolutely stand to learn a thing or two medically or about anatomy...as I'm sure most of America could.

Isn't it usually the case that women are more emotionally attached rather than physically attached to a man? Trust me, I don't get turned on by a male's body part unless he is my boyfriend. Inserting or cleaning a catheter is not a turn on. It's work. If she does becomes desensitized and is less interested in you, I doubt it's because she is exposed to too many male parts. More likely than not, nurses will get stressed out at their job and this might affect your relationship (not the other reason). Have you discussed this with your girlfriend? This seems more like an insecurity issue on your part. I suggest you talk to her and get her reassurance if you haven't already done so.

ETA: If you had already discussed with her and she had already reassured you, and you're still feeling iffy. I suggest you build confidence in yourself. In reality, it's not her, it's you. You need to trust her and her word. If the uncertainty of losing a loved one's interest due to work is too much for you, perhaps being in a relationship with a nurse isn't best for you.

OP changed his user name. I thought you were from SC. Did you move last night?

What is going on lately with the new posters/multiple username thing?

+ Join the Discussion