Boyfriend of a Nursing Student

Published

I'm in a very committed relationship with a nursing student at a different school about a half an hour from me. We've been dating for a little over a year and both agree that marriage is in or future, I'm extremely proud of her for her career choice and try everything to be as supportive as I can from a distance but for the past few weeks I can't get one thing off my mind. I've seen the threads about a boyfriend being upset that his girlfriend has to touch or see another man's member among other things and that isn't what this is about, at first that thought and picture really bothered me but at this point I'm honestly over that and don't really care about it, I understand it's part of the job and I'm not concerned. I'm also not worried about her being turned on by inserting a catheter or giving a bed bath but the one thing that bothers me is how a nurse can have any interest in seeing her significant other naked after seeing several men naked that day at work, I know they are "just body parts" on patients but is it really different when it's your boyfriend or husband's? I know this question will probably seem dumb to everyone on here but as a management major who has no experience in the medical field it's hard for me to imagine that she won't eventually become desensitized to the male body and anatomy and develop the "seen one, seen them all" mentality. That would just really be hard because I know the way I look at her body and like to think that it goes both ways and I would just hate to lose that. Any advice would be appreciated, if you want to tell me how immature it is or to get over it then save your time, I realize it's small and probably largely unreasonable but I'm just looking to see how other couples or husbands have dealt with this if they've had the same problem or if it really isn't a problem then I would like to hear that too. Thanks in advance

I really don't think it's the patients you have to worry about. Now if some hot orthopedic surgeon show your girlfriend his "body part" then you should be worried. :uhoh3:

That's all. :confused:

Oh no!...Lol

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Emergency/Cath Lab.
What about the 1%? :D

That little guy, I wouldn't worry about that little guy.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
That little guy, I wouldn't worry about that little guy.

Are you and AlphaM brothers?

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Pediatric Hematology/Oncology.

Lucky you women aren't typically visual creatures in the same way men are. It's her brain that deals with all of that the best, not her eyes. Keep that in mind and you will be a happy guy, especially when the stress of school and, later, the job, is what dampens her libido.

I think this is where a lot of guys go wrong with their wives and girlfriends. Guys are way too quick to think females work the same way they do. :no:

Up Vote Up Vote ×

My bf asked me this same question a few weeks ago when I started working. Honestly it's almost like changing a baby's diaper. If you were to change your nieces or daughters diaper you wouldn't then look at your GF any differently.

And to be honest dealing with a patients private parts is a little bit embarassing for the nurse too so the mindset and feelings in the situation are totally different than when a nurse is with her BF.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Thank you, that makes a lot of sense. As I said before I guess for someone with no medical experience it's a hard thing to really understand.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Pediatric.
"There is Work member, and there is Recreational member. I'm sure your GF knows the difference. "

- Farawyn

Best. Quote. Ever.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Urgent Care, Oncology.

A few thoughts...

1. Have you discussed this with her? If it really bothers you and you're talking marriage now might be a good time to sit down and have a conversation about this expressing your concerns. We here can offer our advice and try to relate to your experience but at the end of the day you really need to be comfortable discussing topics the even go above and beyond this.

2. There are going to be creeps. I'm pretty sure (almost) every nurse has some sort of creepy genitalia-bearing patient story. Women will do it, too - it's not just limited to men. That's something to consider as well - what if a woman is being "creepy" to your girlfriend? Does that make a difference?

Just my two cents.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I appreciate your input, yes I have said something to her about it on a couple of occasions and she's always said that it won't ever happen and I trust her but I wanted to get the input of some people who have been through school and in the profession for a while. Also, I would hate to think of her or anyone having to deal with that but I'm aware that it happens and I'm not really bothered by that (other than thinking that anyone who does that should suffer serious consequences), the biggest concern for me was the...I guess loss of intimacy after seeing so many naked men and the fear of her developing a seen one seen them all mindset.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
I appreciate your input, yes I have said something to her about it on a couple of occasions and she's always said that it won't ever happen and I trust her but I wanted to get the input of some people who have been through school and in the profession for a while. Also, I would hate to think of her or anyone having to deal with that but I'm aware that it happens and I'm not really bothered by that (other than thinking that anyone who does that should suffer serious consequences), the biggest concern for me was the...I guess loss of intimacy after seeing so many naked men and the fear of her developing a seen one seen them all mindset.

Bolding is mine.

If she loves you now & after nursing school, seeing random naked men for nursing purposes won't make her want to not have sex with you or have sex with them, trust me. If she's seeing their member, there is something wrong with it & it is awkward for that person.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
I appreciate your input, yes I have said something to her about it on a couple of occasions and she's always said that it won't ever happen and I trust her but I wanted to get the input of some people who have been through school and in the profession for a while. Also, I would hate to think of her or anyone having to deal with that but I'm aware that it happens and I'm not really bothered by that (other than thinking that anyone who does that should suffer serious consequences), the biggest concern for me was the...I guess loss of intimacy after seeing so many naked men and the fear of her developing a seen one seen them all mindset.

All jokes aside, if you are as strong as you say you are it's not going to happen. If it does happen that you drift apart, it will NOT be because of that.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I appreciate that, while I know it's immature and small I guess its just a strange thought and not exactly a pleasant one but again I appreciate your response.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion