Bad Day, How do you get over it?

HeatherGurl84 · Nov 17, 2013

I always try to put myself in the families shoes. They are stressed, want the BEST care possible for that person, and when they are hospitalized, in their mind, your world should revolve around their family member. We would be the same way if we weren't nurses and didn't understand how things work hospital wise. Did your floor have any available extra helpers (tech, CNAS, or nurse that wasn't busy at that moment?)

All you can do is BREATHE, go home, take a hot bath, work out, whatever you do to de-stress. I personally indulge in something sweet or a hot bubble bath. Don't let it hang over your head and ruin the care you can give other patients.

BSNbeauty, BSN, RN · Nov 17, 2013

I'm sorry you had a bad day. However, could you please explain what you mean by " wipe " ? Was the patient soiled and needed his peri-care or did they want a full bed bath? If the it was the latter, and patient just need his bottom cleansed I would have went on and done this before report. I would be concerned about skin breakdown and etc. Also, like the PP said, put yourself in the family shoes. If they wanted a full bed bath which does take time, I would have done the same as you.

Don't let it get to you, there will always be good days and bad days.

Altra, BSN, RN · Nov 17, 2013

I get over it because I never had the expectation that everyone would like me and never say a cross word to me.

In fairness, did you really think that your manager would challenge the CEO publicly? Is that a reasonable expectation?

People complain. A lot. Don't take it personally.

LVN2RNMom, ASN, BSN, LVN · Nov 17, 2013

I wouldn't take it personally. You can't please everybody all of the time. Some of my patients have said I was "ok" as a nurse but I did everything I needed for them as a nurse & beyond. I was like they said what? Then I reminded myself the above. When people are sick or just had surgery, they aren't in the "clear" mind to see everything you did for them. Don't worry.

Caffeine_IV · Nov 17, 2013

I don't let it influence my next day. I tell myself it is just 12 hours..well usually 13. I go in positive and say today will be better than the day before. I get to clock out and go home to warm bed when I'm done.

You won't be able to please people all the time especially in nursing. Everyone wants to be first in line but it doesn't work that way.

Cosmo&Wanda · Nov 17, 2013

It is impossible to please all of your patients and their families. That being said, there are ways to approach them in order to avoid problems. When I have to make patients wait because I have had emergencies, I always make sure to get to those patients ASAP and apologize for making them wait. When patients and families demand things during change of shift I will talk to them and explain that the timing is bad logistically, and ask if there is a way we can change the routine moving forward so that everything works out better. Most importantly, I try to respond to my patients needs as quickly as possible as often as possible, this way when I have to make them wait they usually understand. I also offer extra help to my coworkers whenever I can, then in turn they offer help to me when I am overwhelmed.

Lennonninja, MSN, APRN, NP · Nov 17, 2013

You get past it with wine and a bubble bath. Never think that a manager will have your back, it will basically never happen. Sorry you had such a terrible shift

ktwlpn, LPN · Nov 17, 2013

I had a patient family bad mouthing me because I refused to wipe their dad when they called because I had already been called to another room for something MEDICAL and important. I had also been honest with a family and stated that what they wanted would not be done until later in the afternoon because it was shift change and there was no one to do it ( he wanted the patient taken outside). This person knew the ceo of our unit and went to him. Not my manager...the freaking CEO and said I refused to do something. I did NOT refuse, I said it was shift change and gave him a time I would do it.
I am so frustrated. People expect too much of me. How do you get over this and go back to work? I really don't even want to go back because of the day I had. My manager has yet to stand up for me in either case and one of the people has already left. I am sure I will get dinged on my evaluation for customer complaints, even if they are unrealistic

This will teach you how to be "politically correct" in this type of situation. You are correct-people DO have unrealistic expectations and it's the rare unit manager who will take your side. Your best approach is to avoid the problem. In the first instance the best response would be "I'll be there as soon as I can" and then you should have continued to prioritize your patient's requests (without them realizing their needs have plummeted to the bottom of your list) and follow through with delivering the care in the order necessary.

In the second case you are learning the valuable lesson of NEVER letting on to the patient and their family that you don't have sufficient staff for any reason. Your best response to that request would have been "Sure, I'll get your dad outside at around 3:30 (or whatever time would have worked for you) .Another approach-could you have gotten the patient into a wheelchair to enable the family to take him out themselves? That's a better solution if it was possible.

You don't get over this stuff, it sucks the life out of you. You have to learn from it and move on. You go back in there with the attitude that you'll never say "no" or "not now" but instead , "sure-as soon as I can". It takes practice but it's worth it.

sbostonRN · Nov 17, 2013

I like to exercise after a bad day. A year ago, I would have read a post like this and rolled my eyes. But I started walking and running and now I love it. When I go through periods of laziness, I actually am more anxious and less able to deal with work stress and life stress than when I'm doing well with keeping up with it.

Also like to go out with friends or hubby and have a nice dinner or a few beers and talk about something other than work!

LadyFree28, BSN, LPN, RN · Nov 17, 2013

I get over it because I never had the expectation that everyone would like me and never say a cross word to me. In fairness did you really think that your manager would challenge the CEO publicly? Is that a reasonable expectation? People complain. A lot. Don't take it personally.[/quote']
THIS.
I recently had a Dr. Try to scream at me about another's mistake, and I politely interjected and wanted what I needed for the pt; she wanted the DON, I transferred her GLADLY. On to the next thing.
People get unhappy ALL the time; people don't like systematic procedures, rules, why they are on specific meds, etc. I've learned to not take it personally, that usually involves me turning the issue towards the person slinging it; right, wrong or neither, either there will be an improvement or a way to work it out or not; it usually works out either way....in my case, I still have a job; and we have pretty aggressive physicians, or at least they THINK they are...and some of the patients and families THINK they are too...

Penelope_Pitstop, BSN, RN · Nov 18, 2013

I go home and do something that does NOT involve work at all. Sadly, this includes this message board. (Sorry, Brian!)

I like to watch very very stupid videos on the internet, like old Conan or SNL stuff, or just really dumb funny things. Or go to silly websites like Awkward Family Photos.

I've found most bad moods can be changed by a nice hot shower and a cup of tea.