I will begin by telling you a little about myself. I have always been a straight A student and never in trouble with the law. I got married when I was 20 and then started nursing school. Everything was great until 2003 (my senior year of nursing school) when my husband cheated on me with my sister. This was the start of a criminal record for me. 2 counts misdemeanor assault, originally charged as felonies. I was put on 1 year probation. I managed to graduate cum laude and already had my foot in the door working at a great hospital. However, due to being on legal probation I was given a probationary nursing license. I think perhaps due to the tremendous strain going on in my personal life I was not as focused as I should have been. One day when I was about to come off orientation I had a patient with hourly blood sugars in which the aide was to get the blood sugars and myself (RN) was to adjust the insulin pump. The aide got behind and falsified a blood sugar which I brought to the attention of my preceptor. She was fired and I went about my day. As many nurses do, I charted at the end of the day and filled in my blood sugar sheet as I would have adjusted everything not thinking about the falsified one. Since I did not adjust the insulin to the fake blood sugar, but wrote that I did, I was fired for false documentation. During the month of my unemployment I became very sick but did not have health insurance, so when I started my new job I tried to get to the doctor asap. I was assigned to a preceptor and not taking my own patients yet. We had only 2 patients and the floor was very slow. My preceptor said it would be ok for me to go to the doctor and come back. My mistake was not okaying this with the director. I got fired again for patient abandonment. I feel embarrassed even saying any of this. So, I ended up unemployed again, and in a abusive relationship. I felt the only way I could get away from him was to get a job. Since my allegations were not of public record yet, I lied on an application to get a job in another city. I got it. I had to get an attorney to fight having my license revoked and he told me I had to come clean with my employer because the settlement was going to involve a suspension. So myself, my attorney, my director and the VP of nursing sat down and I spilled my guts as well as many tears. To my surprise they did not fire me, but put me on a probation with the hospital. I fell in love with that place and vowed I would never leave. They knew all my dirt and gave me a chance. I worked there more than 2 years when my worst nightmare happened. On my day off I took one of my dad's percocets for some back pain. The next day they UA'd me (they had been doing so about every 6 mos due to my probation). It was pos. I had no prescription to be taking such a drug. I was fired. I am still in shock. Ashamed. Embarrassed. Wondering how I could have been so stupid. Now I sit here unemployed-again- with a criminal record and serious actions taken against my nursing license. I tried to get another job, but employers dont hire people with my record, understandably. I thought about joining the military, trying to go back to school, working in fast food again. Nothing sounds good but nursing and I dont think there is any going back for me. Thats my nightmare in a nutshell. I've heard plenty of advise but all from people not in this profession. I'd like to hear what another nurse has to say. Am I finished?
what about using your knowledge and taking a course in massage therapy and doing that? you would still be in a helping proffession, and you could continue to also focus on your own healing while trying to use what you have learned to help others. or maybe an addictions counselor or something like that? that type of position would be great once you are in a better place. it would really give you a chance to use what you learned from this whole experience and create a positive by helping others.
Because of being fired for a pos UA, the board of nursing requested me to take a drug and alcohol eval. My recommendation was for 6 outpatient drug counseling sessions. As of right now this is all the bon wants me to do. Its still pretty early as far as knowing what my discipline is. My concern is that while I can comply with the bon as far as what they want me to do, what about future employers? What do I have to show them that I have learned from my mistakes and can be a valuable asset to their facility? Are there any classes, support groups, anything for people in my boat that I can complete or be a part of to assist in this? I will probably end up working in a restaurant for awhile, or joining the military (which scares the heck out of me). I just dont know what I can do that would be something positive in the eyes of future employers.
Talk with your former employer. It is possible that after going through this counseling they will take you back. It is also possible that they will give you a good recommendation even while acknowledging your error. Working outpatient in community health for a few years might be a great area for you. They won't be worried about access to medications. I would not join the military. Right now, I would complete the counseling the BON wants you to complete. I would sign up for individual counseling as well. An individual counselor can help you figure out what you have to show for your mistakes.
Specializes in Leadership, Psych, HomeCare, Amb. Care.
AMC,
Some had suggested you get counseling, not be a nurse.
The truth is there have been, and always will be, impaired doctors, lawyers, pharmacists, pastors & priests, and yes... Nurses.
Many have successfully come back from "the dark side"
Have you looked at treatment programs specifically for impaired health care professionals?
You need to get your head straight & gain some insight into what led up to these problems, what your triggers & red flags are, and what you need to do to prevent that from happening again.
You know, drug & alcohol sibstance abuse programs are often staffed by those who have been there.
Get your head straight FIRST, then work what what vocational path you can pursue.
Okay so I am probably going to get stoned for what i am about to say but here goes. Grow up take responsibility for your actions and get some help! As a nurse you should have learned at some point in school or real world to take responsibilty for things even if they werent your fault. Let me give you some examples. You come in and start your shift, you see the previous nurse hung a wrong bag of IV fluid, or patient didnt get a med that was ordered. That patients Doctor is not going to care a rats butt that you werent the nurse that made those mistakes. The only thing they are going to care about is that YOU are the nurse that takes ownership of em and fixes em. Lying about a patient care event is going to get you in more trouble every time. Sorry I had to vent.. because I have been that nurse that didnt take responsibility and I actually didnt realize i was doing that til it was pointed out to me. So now I dont care whos fault it is I am the first person to say oops let me fix that for ya!! Just my two cents worth. I really dont have any sympathy for some one who cant take responsibilty for their actions your 29 not 15. And taking responsibility after the fact, thats not taking responsibilty. I do hope you get help. I agree with other posters . You need to get counseling and find out why you do the things you do, maybe then with a little insight you can get back into nursing.
And I ask that you please dont judge me as to what you would do if you were in an abusive relationship.
I was in an abusive marriage with two children. I realize people handle things in different ways but the very last thing on my mind was doing something illegal. You got a second chance and you blew it. I don't think the military would take you even not as a nurse. My advice would be to go into counseling and perhaps drug rehab. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh but I have to be honest and I'm sorry if it hurts. Lying on a job application was totally over the edge.
I remember before I graduated from the RN Program, two members of the New York State Nurses Association were in the classroom, and one of them actually had her LPN license revoked inasmuch as she stole the control substances for self use purposes. However, after 6 years of struggling, she got back her license. She is now working for the NYSNA...going from college to college, telling the future RN's about her story. It was a sort of campaign initiated by the NYSNA because 16 to 22% of the NYS nurses use illegal drugs or alcohol abuse. Anyhow, the main point is that she got back her license.
But I guess you must be very honest with the BON, and you have to show them you are sincere....
For anyone wondering, the military did accept me. Just like 90% of you they felt after looking at a piece of paper that I must be the worst scum of the earth not worthy of breathing air. However, after meeting me, they did see sincere desire to do good and potential in me. I had interviews with 3 captains who all approved me to enter and pushed for my enlistment. Unfortunately, I developed a medical disqualification that once resolved (if I still wish to enter) I can. As far as my nursing license goes, I gave it back. I work as a waitress in a restaurant. I cant pay my bills. I guess that makes me bigger scum now right? I miss my patients everyday. I dont know how to make anything better or where to start. Guess I will just be happy I have my roof over my head and something to eat for today. I am happy that the majority of you are so saintly that you have the God given right to tell people like me that we aren't worth spitting on. You have a nice day too.
By the way, that last response was not pointed at you chuck, or others that have not been so nasty. I hope to the good lord that you people that talk and judge like you do have limited patient care with individuals that need mental help because you would push them over the edge. I appreciate you individuals that are true nurses and health care people at heart and know what therapeutic healing really means. I may have my problems and have done things I know are wrong, but I am educated. I will not view this post again as it does nothing but make me feel worse about a situation I have 0 control over at this point. That God for the truly healing people out there. Thank you.
tsunami62
14 Posts
what about using your knowledge and taking a course in massage therapy and doing that? you would still be in a helping proffession, and you could continue to also focus on your own healing while trying to use what you have learned to help others. or maybe an addictions counselor or something like that? that type of position would be great once you are in a better place. it would really give you a chance to use what you learned from this whole experience and create a positive by helping others.