Are you married sweetie?"

chrisrn24 · Jun 7, 2013

If someone asks (which I get asked the time) I say "no I'm not, I'm single" to which they typically give a compliment. Ill say thanks back I crack a joke.

If you're gay and don't want to tell them, just say "I'm in a very happy relationship."If you have kids but don't want to talk about them say "yes I do, now how are you doing?" Or whatever...change the subject.

They're just trying to make conversation. It's not personal.

K+MgSO4, BSN · Jun 7, 2013

My patient population has a high percentage of Greek and Italian who emigrated to Melbourne in the 60's. Min to moderate amounts of english language.

The first question most of the women of that age ask is "you married? You babies?". Followed by how old? At 28 most of them had 3 or 4 kids. After they offer to set me up with sons / grandsons I tell them if I had 4 babies I wouldn't be here to look after them. They mostly agree with that and leave it alone.

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Jun 7, 2013

I don't like being asked personal questions by patients, but I'll answer if they're not getting too personal. After all, we ask them the most personal of questions and expect answers.

I'm a single female in my early 30s with no children, which seems incomprehensible to my older patients who come from a generation where most women got married in their teens or early 20s and gave birth to all of their children prior to age 30. They're even more shocked when they discover that I do not really want to have kids.

BSNbeauty, BSN, RN · Jun 7, 2013

Every day I work I get asked the same in addition to whether I have kids or not. I work in PP so these questions come up alot. I've also have had several patients over my career want to hook me up with their sons or other family members.

Anyway, I digress. I don't like the questions either so I keep it short and sweet. I tell the truth. At the moment I'm happily married, no kids.

BSNbeauty, BSN, RN · Jun 7, 2013

I don't like being asked personal questions by patients, but I'll answer if they're not getting too personal. After all, we ask them the most personal of questions and expect answers.
I'm a single female in my early 30s with no children, which seems incomprehensible to my older patients who come from a generation where most women got married in their teens or early 20s and gave birth to all of their children prior to age 30. They're even more shocked when they discover that I do not really want to have kids.

I thought I was the only one. I work in PP and many co-workers are shocked that I'm not walking around with baby fever. Truth is, 90 percent of me do not want kids. I like only having to be responsible for me and my husband. I like being selfish. Heck, I am 24. I like to sleep when I want, work when I want, go out when I want. I'm sure kids are a blessing but I'm not too sure I want to experience motherhood. My husband wants kids but he knew how I felt way before we got married. Sorry to go off on a tangent. Just nice to see I'm not the only one.

sharpeimom · Jun 7, 2013

Before I was married, it seemed as though so many patients thought they could ask me about any part of my private life. I think much of it was because I looked so much younger than I was. When I bought myself a cheap wedding ring, many of the questions stopped.

After I got married and as I looked a bit older, patients would notice my heavy, wide, domed ring and ask how many kids we had.

That was a tough question which was not easily or lightly answered. Our only son had been a micropreemie and had died a short

time later. To say we have no children, is to deny that he ever was, yet we are childless.

I simply said, "Yes, I'm married." and left it there, which for a psych hospital was a good safe answer.

chrisrn24 · Jun 7, 2013

I wouldn't tell a patient I didn't want kids. Might be seen as insulting if they have children or love children. I would just say, "no I do not, maybe in the future" even if you have no intentions of children.

ChristineN, BSN, RN · Jun 7, 2013

Whenever patients ask me if I have children I tell them I am "too young" to have kids. Most are surprised by that answer and will either drop it or will try to agree with me and say there is always the future

sharpeimom · Jun 7, 2013

Another answer I frequently use was that all our children had whiskers and when we added the dog(s) I'd say all our kids had furcoats.

OCNRN63, RN · Jun 7, 2013

I wouldn't tell a patient I didn't want kids. Might be seen as insulting if they have children or love children. I would just say, "no I do not, maybe in the future" even if you have no intentions of children.

Why not? They opened the door. I would never lie and say I might have kids in the future if I had not earthly plan of doing so. I've told patients that I never had the desire to have children and no one ever became offended.

chrisrn24 · Jun 8, 2013

Why not? They opened the door. I would never lie and say I might have kids in the future if I had not earthly plan of doing so. I've told patients that I never had the desire to have children and no one ever became offended.

I guess I don't see the problem lying.