Did ya catch the article in July AJN called "I'm No Angel" written by Margaret C. Belchers MSN, RN, CCRN ? Alot of follow-up opinions in this October issue as well. If you read it....what's your opinion?
She sure gets bashed for the article in follow-ups. I agree with her totally. I smile and cringe when I get called an angel. Sorry folks. I'd take solid, reality-based praise like "You are so competent" or "You are so smart" or "I trust my family member in your hands because you are so knowledgeable" over being an "angel" any day of the week. It is such an outdated notion. So Florence Nightengale-ish. We've come along way baby. It takes away from what we really are doing as nurses and what we are capable of, and how much responsibility we carry. Nice yes, caring yes, compassionate yes....but here on earth as a fellow HUMAN BEINGS....not magical angels. YUCK. EEK. SAPPY. This to me is not bad to feel this way. It is not a gruff, old, burnt-out nurse attitude. To me it is enriching thought and a foundation for a more pleasing and rewarding career platform for the future. We all need to work towards eliminating the Doctor=God and Nurse=Angel mentality built in to this profession. It is a dysfunctional illness that only serves to make us loosen our grasp on reality and to minimize our true worth. It makes for poor doc/nurse relationships. Our patients see us as pillow-fluffing angels of the past...as if the docs are in the hall 24/7 handling every ticking moment. And we, as nurses are OK with that? Feel good and valued about that? Public education....long overdue. But to get the right message out, we have to LIVE the part. EDUCATED NURSE. NOT ANGEL. I am a good nurse and that is what is necessary to do a good job. (Besides, wings and halos tend to get all tangled up in privacy curtains) Tell me i'm thoughtful, sweet, caring...just don't put me on the Angel pedestal.
Thanks for this hour of your life. I will step off of my soapbox now.
I think a lot of this angel crap is still sexual stereotying rearing its ugly head personally.
Male nurses don't get called honey, sweetie or angel in my experience.
But then I've always been the kind of woman who most appreciated comments about my intelligence vs my other attributes...not all among us think this way do they.
I wouldn't say that the angel concept offends me - that's too strong. What concerns me is the underlying ideology is embodies, so well articualted by Trauma-tized: angels are not competent, or professional, or individual. Most of all, they are not human - angels don't have hangovers, illnesses, families concerns, or the base needs actual people do.
How many of us postpone having a glass of water, eating something on a busy shift, or een going to the toilet, because they're too busy? I'd say all of us, at least occasionally. Now think - how often is that patient-centred care not urgent, but running around getting blankets and glasses of water (with not quite so much ice, dear) or answering the phone?
I don't know about you, but sometimes I get to the end of a ten hour shift and realise I didn't drink anything all night - something I'd be very unhappy with from my patients. Renal nurse, hydrate thyself! I don't think of myself as an angel at all, but this thread has made me realise that my role as a nurse, complementing my roles as dutiful daughter/oldest sister/female, means that I often prioritise the needs of others over myself, even when my need (to empty a disturbingly full bladder) is more urgent than my patient's. Waiting for a drink the three minutes going to the bathroom takes won't hurt my patient, and will help me, but I tend to think of it as "Can't go until I've finished caring for all my patients."
Who knew one words (angel) could carry so much subtext?!
Actually, I think what FN did in her day was probably a lot more trying and difficult than the way we nurse today.
Actually, I think that if Florence Nightengale woke up to day and put in a shift....She might think she had died and come back a DOCTOR!
LOL
Not that nurses are doctors....comparing her role and todays nursing roles.....it's like comparing apples and oranges. Is it harder to mop floors, can pickles and bathe patients or to maintain vents, monitor hemodynamics and titrate drips? BOTH are challenging. Maybe she had longer hours.....only because she was trapped by her "angelic calling", and was a woman with much less power or control than we have today. I'm not saying her work wasn't hard....but so is ours....AND very different. Today, I choose how many hours to work.....have more control, am NOT the image of FN. Isn't it funny when staffing or sups try to make you feel guilty for not working your day off, or staying later in a shift? Interpretation: If you were a TRUE angel.... Flo would do it.... LOL!
Flo=selfless Me=Not selfless Be wary of nursing instructors with ice age ideals trying to instill the FN model of Nursing into your soul. Unless you want the burden of being both the apple AND orange....
Not that nurses are doctors....comparing her role and todays nursing roles.....it's like comparing apples and oranges. Is it harder to mop floors, can pickles and bathe patients or to maintain vents, monitor hemodynamics and titrate drips? BOTH are challenging. Maybe she had longer hours.....only because she was trapped by her "angelic calling", and was a woman with much less power or control than we have today. I'm not saying her work wasn't hard....but so is ours....AND very different. Today, I choose how many hours to work.....have more control, am NOT the image of FN. Isn't it funny when staffing or sups try to make you feel guilty for not working your day off, or staying later in a shift? Interpretation: If you were a TRUE angel.... Flo would do it.... LOL!
Flo=selfless Me=Not selfless Be wary of nursing instructors with ice age ideals trying to instill the FN model of Nursing into your soul. Unless you want the burden of being both the apple AND orange....
Very well said! I also had never thought of it like that, but you are so right on. I recently had an accountant tell me how she envied me and wished she could have been a nurse - but it was a calling. When I told her that it was simply a job, the look she gave me made me feel like a serial killer. And I actually felt guilty about having said that! Felt like I must be in the wrong profession cause I hadn't be "called"
Great thread. Thanks for making me think and for pointing out that I don't have to feel guilty for not being Florence.
Very well said! I also had never thought of it like that, but you are so right on. I recently had an accountant tell me how she envied me and wished she could have been a nurse - but it was a calling. When I told her that it was simply a job, the look she gave me made me feel like a serial killer. And I actually felt guilty about having said that! Felt like I must be in the wrong profession cause I hadn't be "called"
Great thread. Thanks for making me think and for pointing out that I don't have to feel guilty for not being Florence.
It would be nice if the general public would get a clue and join us here in the 21st century wouldn't it?
I have never had ANY desire to be like Flo. I have never had ANY desire to make my career the most important part of my life. I don't (and WON'T) feel one bit guilty for being a nurse because it puts money in the bank. My patients still get the best of care AND I get to have nice things and a life of my own.
perhaps it is being taken too literally. Maybe the people that are using Angel
are using it to mean a caring entity that is devoting time to them. I am no Angel either but would never complain about being called one. I also don't complain when people tell me they appreciate me or thank me for handing them something or any of the thousands of things I do daily. Some people are just courteous and some people just feel very blessed to be recieving adequate to above average care. Some people just use words like Angel as a compliment.
Then again I call Pt's bubba, sweety, sir, Maam etc. so I guess they can call me whatever they want.
forget the flames for using sweety and bubba I really don't care what you think as long as the Pt doesn't mind
I think a lot of this angel crap is still sexual stereotying rearing its ugly head personally.
Male nurses don't get called honey, sweetie or angel in my experience.
But then I've always been the kind of woman who most appreciated comments about my intelligence vs my other attributes...not all among us think this way do they.
I am a male nurse and I get Honey and sweety all the time. I also get Big Guy. Tiny, Big Boy, and many others. I never take offense. I also as I mentioned call Pt's by little terms of endearment and they do not complain.
I read the original article and I agree with every word. While it's true that there are some who have heeded a "calling" to nursing, there are many of us who have not. When there is talk of a "calling", it has a religious connotation to me and that gives me the creeps. And I think that for those of us who do not, if we do not feel this "calling", there is a sort of judgment made that we are in nursing for the wrong reasons, that we don't belong and that we cannot possibly be good nurses. There is a lot more to nursing than holding hands, giving hugs and "caring".
The responses that she received to her article are a prime example of nursing being its own worst enemy. We want to be recognized for our professional skill and education but we don't want to give up the hearts and hugs image either. I recognize that being called an "angel" is meant to be a compliment but it is also a reflection of the belief that little is required to be a nurse other than to care and hold hands while physicians and pretty much everyone else get the credit for giving all of the meaningful, skilled technical care and for saving lives and making the differences. I don't appreciate that at all.
I am a mlae nurse and I get Honey and sweety all the time. I also get Big Guy. Tiny, Big Boy, and many others. I never take offense. I also as I mentioned call Pt's by little terms of endearment and they do not complain.
I am not referring to pet names we get called. Not the issue at all. What I am referring to, as previously stated, the general belief that still exists in the public that Docs are gods and Nurses are angels and are selflessly there due to a "calling".
Specializes in private duty/home health, med/surg.
While I respect the right of nurses to form whatever opinion about the word "Angel" that they choose, I honestly can not imagine that the average patient would tell a nurse that "You're an angel" with the negative meaning that some people here are ascribing to it.
perhaps it is being taken too literally. maybe the people that are using angel
are using it to mean a caring entity that is devoting time to them. i am no angel either but would never complain about being called one. i also don't complain when people tell me they appreciate me or thank me for handing them something or any of the thousands of things i do daily. some people are just courteous and some people just feel very blessed to be recieving adequate to above average care. some people just use words like angel as a compliment.
then again i call pt's bubba, sweety, sir, maam etc. so i guess they can call me whatever they want.
forget the flames for using sweety and bubba i really don't care what you think as long as the pt doesn't mind
you sound like my kind of nurse.:)
being called "angel" is rather nice compared to a lot of other negatives i've been called during my growing up years and well into my adult years. there are some adults (patients and visitors of patients, too) who call me worse things, so being called "angel" truly doesn't bother me. heck, i've had old elderly patients (male and female) refer to me as "sweetie, sweetie pie, sweetheart, angel, dollface, honey...." it feels good to be complimented since i was never complimented as a child or much as an adult either.
different strokes for different folks....and that is totally okay!!! :)
While I respect the right of nurses to form whatever opinion about the word "Angel" that they choose, I honestly can not imagine that the average patient would tell a nurse that "You're an angel" with the negative meaning that some people here are ascribing to it.
It's not a beef about a WORD.....it's a beef about a LARGER CONCEPT. Not about sweetie, angel or hun, nor do I assume that if I get called angel...as in thanks angel as an example, that they are referring to the ISSUE we are discussing in THIS thread.
for not being Florence.
mattsmom81
4,516 Posts
I think a lot of this angel crap is still sexual stereotying rearing its ugly head personally.
Male nurses don't get called honey, sweetie or angel in my experience.
But then I've always been the kind of woman who most appreciated comments about my intelligence vs my other attributes...not all among us think this way do they.