Did ya catch the article in July AJN called "I'm No Angel" written by Margaret C. Belchers MSN, RN, CCRN ? Alot of follow-up opinions in this October issue as well. If you read it....what's your opinion?
She sure gets bashed for the article in follow-ups. I agree with her totally. I smile and cringe when I get called an angel. Sorry folks. I'd take solid, reality-based praise like "You are so competent" or "You are so smart" or "I trust my family member in your hands because you are so knowledgeable" over being an "angel" any day of the week. It is such an outdated notion. So Florence Nightengale-ish. We've come along way baby. It takes away from what we really are doing as nurses and what we are capable of, and how much responsibility we carry. Nice yes, caring yes, compassionate yes....but here on earth as a fellow HUMAN BEINGS....not magical angels. YUCK. EEK. SAPPY. This to me is not bad to feel this way. It is not a gruff, old, burnt-out nurse attitude. To me it is enriching thought and a foundation for a more pleasing and rewarding career platform for the future. We all need to work towards eliminating the Doctor=God and Nurse=Angel mentality built in to this profession. It is a dysfunctional illness that only serves to make us loosen our grasp on reality and to minimize our true worth. It makes for poor doc/nurse relationships. Our patients see us as pillow-fluffing angels of the past...as if the docs are in the hall 24/7 handling every ticking moment. And we, as nurses are OK with that? Feel good and valued about that? Public education....long overdue. But to get the right message out, we have to LIVE the part. EDUCATED NURSE. NOT ANGEL. I am a good nurse and that is what is necessary to do a good job. (Besides, wings and halos tend to get all tangled up in privacy curtains) Tell me i'm thoughtful, sweet, caring...just don't put me on the Angel pedestal.
Thanks for this hour of your life. I will step off of my soapbox now.
I agree with sharann and rnmi2004 that it is probably a thing with the older generation and I accept it as a compliment as it was meant. I work with the elderly so it's a good idea not to get upset because I'm going to hear it and "you're a doll". I think it's just they way they can express themselves ( a lot of them have difficulty with word funding anyway). I'm sure they're not meaning the God/angel, a lot would be mortified if they knew that was the way it was interpreted. I suppose you could write an editorial to your local newspaper and maybe some of your targeted people might read it whrere they wouldn't read AJN. you're right there are some immages of nursing that aren't correct but we survive in spite of them, and can continue to prepetuate the reality by continuing to do our best at our jobs. Yes some will notice and some will not but they probably won't change their thinking anyway. Remember they are where you are because of some defecit whether physical or mental or they wouldn't need us, so they may be in pain etc. and not in the best thinking mode either.
Did ya catch the article in July AJN called "I'm No Angel" written by Margaret C. Belchers MSN, RN, CCRN ? Alot of follow-up opinions in this October issue as well. If you read it....what's your opinion?
She sure gets bashed for the article in follow-ups. I agree with her totally. I smile and cringe when I get called an angel. Sorry folks. I'd take solid, reality-based praise like "You are so competent" or "You are so smart" or "I trust my family member in your hands because you are so knowledgeable" over being an "angel" any day of the week. It is such an outdated notion. So Florence Nightengale-ish. We've come along way baby. It takes away from what we really are doing as nurses and what we are capable of, and how much responsibility we carry. Nice yes, caring yes, compassionate yes....but here on earth as a fellow HUMAN BEINGS....not magical angels. YUCK. EEK. SAPPY. This to me is not bad to feel this way. It is not a gruff, old, burnt-out nurse attitude. To me it is enriching thought and a foundation for a more pleasing and rewarding career platform for the future. We all need to work towards eliminating the Doctor=God and Nurse=Angel mentality built in to this profession. It is a dysfunctional illness that only serves to make us loosen our grasp on reality and to minimize our true worth. It makes for poor doc/nurse relationships. Our patients see us as pillow-fluffing angels of the past...as if the docs are in the hall 24/7 handling every ticking moment. And we, as nurses are OK with that? Feel good and valued about that? Public education....long overdue. But to get the right message out, we have to LIVE the part. EDUCATED NURSE. NOT ANGEL. I am a good nurse and that is what is necessary to do a good job. (Besides, wings and halos tend to get all tangled up in privacy curtains) Tell me i'm thoughtful, sweet, caring...just don't put me on the Angel pedestal.
Thanks for this hour of your life. I will step off of my soapbox now.
Nurses Rock!
I loved what you had to say. MY soapbox began the day in nursing school that my instructor informed all of us that we became nurse because WE care about helping other people and continued with you know that we are not here for the "money". First of all does that mean that airline pilots making 6 figures DON'T care about other people because they make money. Or that people who are underpaid more worthy of helping. THAT all makes me need some phenergan.
I can understand the opinions posted here & what the article's author was saying, and I agree with them for the most part. However, I'm not going to get upset or offended when I've been taking care of a patient who tells me I'm an angel. That is how they want to express their feelings to me.
I'm not sure how nurses can go about addressing this issue. How many patients read AJN? We're not going to give patients a pamphlet--"How to appropriately express gratitude to your nurse." I suppose if it really bothered a nurse, he/she could pleasantly say, "Well thank you--but I'm not an angel, just someone who cares about you."
No, I don't want to be thought of as an "angel." But there are other issues related to nursing stereotypes that irk me even more. In my limited experience, it is the elderly that use the term. Perhaps younger generations don't view us that way, & with time this issue will be a moot point?
I would never attempt to correct the issue on a patient to patient basis persay. "Angel" really rubs my philosophy the wrong way...but i'd never verbalize that to a patient. Like I said, smile and cringe. The problem is much larger than that. Effective public education is where it's at. I don't think it's going to die out with the old folks....seems to live on pretty well through the ages. I hear young people saying "I could never be a nurse or do what you do, it's a calling" B.S. The myth is alive and well.
Specializes in Education, Acute, Med/Surg, Tele, etc.
LOL..well with Halloween tomorrow! Actually we were told please do not wear Angel costumes or Grim reaper, or devil costumes because it may illicit fear or remind folks of death. LOL! Darn, there goes my grim reaper idea! LOL!
Yeah, I tell people all the time..."no dear, not Angel...____(my real name)", with a huge smile and a wink! I try to get away from stereotypes of being somewhat above being human...because if that was the case I would choose superman with powers to set back time and get everything done when a patient wants it all done! LOL!
Nope, I will settle with being human in their eyes, mistakes, being tied to real time, and capable of having real emotions that I can show if I wish to! A person that can be sad when someone suffers, mad when I am getting stepped on, and joyful to the max when something goes well! I person that will sweat when I am running around like crazy, a person that can get the occastional 'brain fart' when multitasking on a tired mind, a person that can get lunch breaks and not feel guilty for taking a moments time for rest and food/drink, and a person that can get sick and should be allowed to call in!
Yeah..not the definition of an angel for sure! LOL!!!!! Very very human!!!!!!
when nurses are referred to as angels, as sometimes happens in popular and professional literature, on television, and in advertising, it doesn't make me proud. when writers in nursing journals state that it takes compassion to be a nurse, that nursing is the sacrifice of oneself for others, and that nursing is a noble profession, i disagree. but i seem to be alone in this. was i really the only one offended by the subtitle of the professional seminar i attended last summer--"the magic and wisdom of nursing"? nursing, in my experience, isn't magic.
when nurses see stereotyped media portrayals unbecoming to us, many write letters and sign petitions. but the angelic, noble, or magical nurse is also a stereotype. we sent letters when er showed doctors firing nurses, but how many letters were sent in response to the jag episode that focused on world war ii nurses, entitled "each of us angels"? not many, which says to me that nurses prefer not to talk about who we really are.
and who are we, really? nursing pays us to place the needs of others before our own. over time, putting others first can lead to self-pity and resentment. but nurses don't talk about that, nor have i seen it written about in any nursing journal. nurses' silence on this issue perpetuates not only the false image of the angelic nurse, but also our own dysfunction. self-sacrifice as the road to nobility has never been good for nurses. it causes burnout and compassion fatigue. we don't talk about the cost of that self-sacrifice; nursing requires its members to keep its secrets.
figure. i don't exist on a higher plane because i work at the bedside. i learned about being a nurse from the "cherry ames" books i read as a child. in the 1943 book, cherry ames, student nurse, author helen wells wrote: "cherry wanted a profession of her own. more than that, she wanted to do vital work, work that the world urgently needs. she honest-to-goodness cared about people and she wanted to help them on a grand and practical scale. but did she have all it takes to be a nurse?" nursing schools, hospital administrators, physicians, and patients all expect us to help "on a grand and practical scale." we expect it of ourselves. that so many nurses see nursing as a calling is a longstanding tradition that has nothing to do with the work we do. what is truly noble and beneficial is to put oneself first--to eat when hungry, rest when tired. but so many nurses don't even go to the bathroom when they need to.
i am a nurse. it is my job. i put on a uniform and comfortable shoes and punch a time clock. i have the education and experience to do for others what they cannot do for themselves. but it's the intimacy of the work that feeds the angel myth. i listen to patients, touch them, reassure them, help them eat and drink, assist them with bodily functions. they are often ashamed of their need for help, and they're grateful to be treated with respect. what patients don't understand is that to me theirs are just a bowel movement to document and emesis to measure, a routine part of my day. i don't exist on a higher plane because i work at the bedside. the work and the flexibility suit me. i meet interesting people from all over the world, and i learn something new every day. sometimes it's clinical information critical to my work. sometimes it's about what movie i should see.
but to call nursing a job rather than a calling isn't to diminish it. i will not stop touching lives if i refuse to call the work magic. i will not be a failure if i give up self-sacrifice for self-care. nurses have not learned this lesson well. if we indeed were to put ourselves first, perhaps there wouldn't be a nursing shortage.
for many reasons, women and men choose nursing. what a radical notion: nurses claiming the human choice of a profession rather than giving angels the credit for our good works. try this: take a look in the mirror, and repeat after me. "i am a nurse. i do a good job. that is enough."
okay....now that the article is posted for others to read, i'll comment on it.
from as far back as i can remember (at least to age nine or ten, and i'm 52), i've heard people refer to others as "angels"....i do it myself.
when i say to someone, you're an angel, i am saying "what a god-send you are!"
that - to me - is paying that person a compliment out of gratitude for what they have done for me that no one else even bothered to do for me -- even after seeing my need.
i am not the least bit offended when people say to me, "you're an angel!" to me, they are saying "what a god-send you are", or "you are a god-send!"
i've been a nurse since march 1987, and i've only had perhaps a handful of patients say to me "you're an angel". those that did, did not offend me because the word has a "different meaning" to me -- obviously -- than it does to many of you who are offended by it.
i am not saying that others are not offended by it, i am saying that i am not. :) the word does not demean me or who i am or what i do in anyway, shape, or form. it's a word of "respect" to me....not one that defames or belittles.
i respect those of you who are offended by it. :)
what a blessing it is to be able to have the energy, the physical stamina, the mental endurance, a brain that works, a body that is not crippled, a heart that loves, and a spirit that thrives. i am all these things whether i am at home or at work. i am i. :)
(gotta go feed my grandbaby. parents are out for the day,so i'm in charge for once.)
okay....now that the article is posted for others to read, i'll comment on it.
from as far back as i can remember (at least to age nine or ten, and i'm 52), i've heard people refer to others as "angels"....i do it myself.
when i say to someone, you're an angel, i am saying "what a god-send you are!"
that - to me - is paying that person a compliment out of gratitude for what they have done for me that no one else even bothered to do for me -- even after seeing my need.
i am not the least bit offended when people say to me, "you're an angel!" to me, they are saying "what a god-send you are", or "you are a god-send!"
i've been a nurse since march 1987, and i've only had perhaps a handful of patients say to me "you're an angel". those that did, did not offend me because the world has a "different meaning" to me -- obviously -- than it does to many of you who are offended by it.
i am not saying that others are not offended by it, i am saying that i am not. :) the word does not demean me or who i am or what i do in anyway, shape, or form. it's a word of "respect" to me....not one that defames or belittles.
i respect those of you who are offended by it. :)
what a blessing it is to be able to have the energy, the physical stamina, the mental endurance, a brain that works, a body that is not crippled, a heart that loves, and a spirit that thrives. i am all these things whether i am at home or at work. i am i. :)
(gotta go feed my grandbaby. parents are out for the day,so i'm in charge for once.)
thanks angel, dollface, cutie pie, sweetheart....no...not demeaning or offensive in that context. i am referring to the big picture, not the microcosmic honey-pie niceties. big picture meaning that nurses are angelic, brainless but sweet taskdoers here at your bedside due to a calling. the docs provide the brainpower behind the curtain....you know, out at the desk thinking everything thru and making all the decisions. the stale myth.
how many handwritten thank you cards does your unit get that go something like this:
thank you to all the competent yada yada doctors that saved our dad and to all the caring wonderful angel nurses sent from heaven...yada yada...you know the ones. wonderful intentions....but sorely misguided by myth and lack of knowledge about the nursing profession. heck, i've even been gifted with little angel pins i can proudly display on my badge.
i love the ones that get it right....thankyou to all the competent docs and nurses....and about our professionalism. i love the patients that say things like.."you must have had alot of training to do what you do" or "the doctor suggested this, what do you think?"
pdf version available! 
ADS RN
38 Posts
I agree with sharann and rnmi2004 that it is probably a thing with the older generation and I accept it as a compliment as it was meant. I work with the elderly so it's a good idea not to get upset because I'm going to hear it and "you're a doll". I think it's just they way they can express themselves ( a lot of them have difficulty with word funding anyway). I'm sure they're not meaning the God/angel, a lot would be mortified if they knew that was the way it was interpreted. I suppose you could write an editorial to your local newspaper and maybe some of your targeted people might read it whrere they wouldn't read AJN. you're right there are some immages of nursing that aren't correct but we survive in spite of them, and can continue to prepetuate the reality by continuing to do our best at our jobs. Yes some will notice and some will not but they probably won't change their thinking anyway. Remember they are where you are because of some defecit whether physical or mental or they wouldn't need us, so they may be in pain etc. and not in the best thinking mode either.