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A little vent about contributing to office occasions

Posted

Has 10 years experience.

My front office staff is made up of 6 ppl plus they count me and counselors as part of the front office staff, so whenever there are holidays, celebrations, birthdays, random special occasions, I'm supposed to participate with them in parties, gift exchanges, whatever. So this week we had a few things going on: we were supposed to make some kind of basket for the PTA to raffle off so I was assigned to bring an item for the basket. It was also administrative workers day so I was asked to bring an item for each of the three secretaries as well as a few dollars to contribute to buying them lunch. It was also the counselor's birthday today so we were having a bday celebration for her and once again contributed a couple of bucks for that. I heard nothing today about the party so around 1 I asked if we did something for her today after all and was told "Oh yeah we got food from blahblah restaurant"... no one bothered to let me know this was going on when it did... no one bothered to ask me if I wanted to eat or grab a slice a cake or mingle at the party... and my clinic is in the front office where I'm in plain view. Funny, there's no issue when it came to asking me to contribute to everything this week plus all other occasions. They've told me before that we all contribute to these things but it's all good because they'll do something special on my birthday too, but my birthday's in the summer so, no... you won't. Maybe I'm overreacting but I'm almost always left out of these parties but yet have contributed whenever asked, so I guess I'm just frustrated and saying I'm absolutely done contributing. Thanks for listening...4 more weeks! :)

Edited by Buggus

Hmmm. Why does this sound familiar? I can see contributing when I am genuinely one of the crowd, but eventually get resentful when I realize I am only included to get something out if me. It should be a two way street. I would be tempted to take vows of destitution and beg off each time.

Buggus

Has 10 years experience.

Yeah, it's like if you're going to expect money or gifts, at least include me in the occasions! And the bday thing I'm not even be mad about because it's in the summer so nothing they can do about that, but they've never even asked when it is and I've been there two years. So it's like don't pretend to plan on celebrating it when you don't even know or ask when it is lol!!

MHDNURSE, BSN, MSN, RN, NP

Specializes in Pediatrics, Community, and School Health. Has 21 years experience.

Wow! I'd be totally hurt :(

ruby_jane, BSN, RN

Specializes in ICU/community health/school nursing. Has 10 years experience.

We're down at the end of the hall so people routinely forget about us. I've tried for years - and SUCCESS! The principal came in to get my aide for the Admin Assistant's celebration today. Will I get something for School Nurse Day? Probably not. But in many ways this year people have let me know how valuable they think I am to this school. Is that better than cake and lunch? Not sure.

It's OK to feel the way you feel. It's hard when you're volun-told to bring stuff. But you're right.... four weeks!

LikeTheDeadSea, BSN, RN

Specializes in School Nursing. Has 6 years experience.

Volun-told is my new favorite word.

I am reminded every day about how I am really only just here when they want something out of me. I feel your pain. They all order food together. Admin, assistants, aides, everyone. Flowers, birthdays, celebrations, pot lucks, donuts. I'm always left out. Do I even get my lunch break? Nope. I eat at my desk next to trash cans filled with vomit, poo or blood daily.

WineRN

Specializes in NCSN. Has 4 years experience.

Is that better than cake and lunch? Not sure.

:roflmao:

My problem is that most of our events fall during the teachers normal lunch breaks, and I am the last person to get lunch coverage so everything is usually packed away by the time I get there.

But I will admit we had a chocolate buffet day that I made time to escape the office for so I could grab a piece of cake and scurry back into the chaos.

OyWithThePoodles, RN

Specializes in Med-surg, school nursing.. Has 10 years experience.

I'm sorry they don't include you, especially when you contribute!!

I am blessed to work at an amazing school. Potluck days one of the admins will stop by and make sure I've eaten (pshh, Girrrl, I was second in line!), and they are actually having my birthday lunch today.

Nurses week comes with lots of goodies and a different grade level coming to my office with cards and posters each day.

I would seriously have to reconsider contributing if I weren't included, all of that adds up, and we all know that we usually aren't paid the best. If they asked why, I would simply tell them that you haven't been included.

Yeah.... I feel your pain. I contribute to every occasion as well and rarely get to participate in the parties or celebrations but....... they do celebrate nurses day every year.

chacha82, ADN, BSN

Has 3 years experience.

I worked in schools for a few years so I know EXACTLY what you are saying. 4 more weeks! When they ask for contributions again, I would look them right in the eye and say "I put in $$$ several times but was never included in the actual party or when we ordered lunch, so please don't be offended, but I just don't feel right about it. I'm sure you can understand." No way I would keep putting in money if they weren't going to include me in the festivities.

I feel your pain. We had an administrator that remembered to include me 90% of the time last year, but he was moved up and the new guy seems to think I am irrelevant unless someone pukes or is bleeding. :nurse:

MrNurse(x2), ADN

Specializes in IMC, school nursing. Has 28 years experience.

Hey Dixiegirl, welcome to AN SN forum. Thought you could just sneak in unnoticed, eh?

kidzcare

Has 5 years experience.

I worked in schools for a few years so I know EXACTLY what you are saying. 4 more weeks! When they ask for contributions again, I would look them right in the eye and say "I put in $$$ several times but was never included in the actual party or when we ordered lunch, so please don't be offended, but I just don't feel right about it. I'm sure you can understand." No way I would keep putting in money if they weren't going to include me in the festivities.

Good wording.

I am asked to contribute to those but I am included in the gifting. I always get something nice, and they remember me on Nurse's Day. I do get invited to contribute to potlucks but I don't contribute since I don't get a lunch break.

THIS!! I recently received an email from the "activities committee" regarding "donating" my $15 for the year to cover milestone birthdays, recognition days, BABY SHOWERS, etc..

Apparently the pregnant school nurse was never noticed waddling around the school, because I never was given a baby shower. Baby was born in January. I've been sent invites to THREE teacher baby showers.

I'm hanging onto my $15. I'll use it to buy diapers. :up:

Nursing Office just isn't in the cliques I guess..

:roflmao:

My problem is that most of our events fall during the teachers normal lunch breaks, and I am the last person to get lunch coverage so everything is usually packed away by the time I get there.

Lunch coverage?! That's a thing?? :roflmao: I quit fighting it. Apparently snowflake's upset tummy without vomiting is an emergency worth interrupting my lunch period.

JerseyTomatoMDCrab, BSN

Specializes in med-surg, IMC, school nursing, NICU. Has 8 years experience.

Volun-told. So true!

I am often hidden in plain sight. I have windows to the main office and a busy hallway on either side of my health room. People have no trouble remembering where I am located when they need Tylenol or for me to look at their rash or when someone may have lice. But in the beginning of this year there was a big BBQ with lots of staff members that I heard nothing about -__-

I try not to dwell on it but sometimes my feelings get hurt. I like to remind myself that I was not really excluded but forgotten.