Going over me to go home

  1. I have this student that comes to me EVERYDAY telling me he feels bad, (He's told me he doesn't got to sleep on time). He has no temp and it's been like this since the beginning of the school year. What I found out is that lately he's been just going over me with the front desk secretary and just calling his grandmother and going home. He tells them he saw me and that's it. The secretary then comes to tell me off why I didn't let him go home, but in all honesty he's fine! I have called his parents before and they told me the same thing, he's fine send him back to class. I'm not sure how to fix this, I get this a lot that the front desk lets them call their parents and they go home without seeing me and it's like, then why am I even here? I don't want to confront them about this but it's getting frustrating.
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  2. 21 Comments

  3. by   iggywench
    Have you discussed this with your principal? It sounds like you need to take your concerns to him or her, and lay some ground rules with the secretary.
  4. by   Amethya
    What I'm worried is they'll say, "She's denying them service." I'm not actually, I give them quick fixes, naps or snacks and if they still feel bad, I call their parents (I do anyway).
  5. by   Farawyn
    You need to discuss this with your Principal. Request a meeting. Write down your concerns so you don't forget.

    She must be on your side about this.

    If she isn't, then direct all follow up calls from the parents to the Principal's office.
  6. by   Amethya
    I went now to ask him if we can talk about this because I'm trying to do my job well and I know it's my first year, I may mess up on some things, but I'm trying to do it right and it's hard to have some authority on this when someone goes over me and decides what to do and it's like then why I am here? He said we'll talk about it later since he will have a meeting soon and I said that's fine.
  7. by   Flare
    tired due to staying up late isn't a medical condition. I would actually take a double pronged approach - talk to the admin about the secretary AND talk to the parent / grandparent about the issue of the student coming down regularly and ultimately wishing to go home. Explain that it is a parent's prerogative to pick up their child, however it will not be medically excused. Be sure your principal is on board before you have this conversation. I get sending home kids when they are sick - but tired due to staying up is another thing. We want behinds in classes.
  8. by   KKEGS
    Are these absences excused? If not he'll (hopefully) be getting himself in trouble with truancy court soon enough. We put the kids who miss school too much on a Doctor's Note Only so if a doctor (or the school nurse) doesn't excuse an absence the unexcused absences start piling up and then the county attorneys get involved for truancy. And we DO enforce it. We have a student going to court next week because of how much school she's missed.
    Last edit by KKEGS on May 5
  9. by   ruby_jane
    Sounds like a team approach is in order. The team (you, the secretary, the principal, perhaps the teacher) need to all be on the same page. Sweet baby can't use the phone to request pick up without seeing you. Have a sit down with them. Leave a copious paper trail, cc'ing the parents. You cannot be responsible for a kid going home "sick" when you haven't performed a full assessment on the kid.

    And let the parent deal with Grandma.
  10. by   NurseBeans
    What about asking the teacher why they keep sending that kid? If it's been discussed with parents and they know he gets tired (which is totally fixable if the parents would just do their job but no one asked me, I know), why does the teacher continue to allow that child out of the classroom?

    Make sure parents are aware of the fix for their child's exhaustion, make sure teacher is aware of the actual issue, make sure secretary is aware that those absences are not excused by you, and then talk to your principal.
  11. by   Amethya
    I just hope I don't get in trouble for anything.
  12. by   WineRN
    Quote from Flare
    Explain that it is a parent's prerogative to pick up their child, however it will not be medically excused.
    ^^This^^

    As long as you are documenting that you have seen and assessed the student and they are well enough for school, the front office can't say you are "denying him service". They are sending him home without cause, so it should be an unexcused

    Quote from Amethya
    I went now to ask him if we can talk about this because I'm trying to do my job well and I know it's my first year, I may mess up on some things, but I'm trying to do it right and it's hard to have some authority on this when someone goes over me and decides what to do and it's like then why I am here? He said we'll talk about it later since he will have a meeting soon and I said that's fine.
    You need to give yourself a hug and a lot more credit than you do. Maybe I am reading your tone wrong, but by immediately putting yourself down by bringing up it's only your first year and bringing up that you "mess up on things", you are putting yourself in a position for people to walk over you. Neither one of those things matter in this situation, the only thing that matters is that front office is excusing a student who is medically fine and who's parents want him in school.
  13. by   Jen-Elizabeth
    My office always checks in with me if a parent shows up stating their child is sick and they are picking them up. If a child is being dismissed by me, I always let the main office know, so they know something is up if they haven't heard from me. Students cannot use cell phones. Both of my office managers are awesome at this and referring parent and student to the dean for consequences. Both principals support it as well and it is in our student handbook we require parents and students to sign.

    Support is key. If the office and principal just don't care, yes, this is a losing battle.

    What time is this student being dismissed? Like another poster said, absences will pile up. And that will be an issue. Maybe grandma needs to be in on this conversation as well if she is the person this student keeps calling.
  14. by   MrNurse(x2)
    The issue I see here is one that we have at my school, access to phones, be they cell or school. We are not consistent in allowing students access to the school phones. This is multipronged with anxiety being the biggest variable in allowing students access. We have a handful of students with anxiety who may call home, despite an official "no phone call" policy. These students will call home and pressure their parents to come pick them up and rescue them from their anxiety inducing locale. Not really what counselors want happening, per our dialog with them. I would prefer to not allow these calls. The office should not be allowing students to make calls.

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