You know you've been a nurse too long when...

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You know you've been a nurse too long when you can't enjoy a movie because of the half minute of CPR compressions only being given at about 50 per minute, with bent arms and there's a flat line on the monitor DURING the compressions. Oh, and it's the obstetrician doing the compressions.

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When you have to use the bathroom but ignore it because you have a gazillion things to do then you realize you are off. Or you automatically hand someone a tissue and sanitizer when they start coughing. And why in the heck do I carry this stuff in my purse in the first place lol.

But now when I have to go I go. Unless it's an emergency the patients and tasks can wait.

Sent from my iPhone using allnurses.com

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Specializes in retired LTC.

... when you're at a restaurant, mall food court, family gathering, wedding reception, etc and you hear someone vigorously coughing. You stop chewing or talking, turn head & locate cougher. You wait for the next couple deep inhalations before you move into next phase of Heimlich Maneuver.

... when you see WeepingAngel's little old lady on icy slippery sidewalk or her husband with snow shovel during a blizzard and think --- here it comes!!!

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Specializes in geriatrics.

... when watching movies or TV shows and a character names a medication that has side effects that totally doesn't match

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You are hanging out with your friends and the on of them falls and you automatically start thinking you need to get immeadiate vitals and fill out an incident report.

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Specializes in Dialysis.

You know you have worked too many hours when you answer your cell phone "dialysis this serenidad how can I help you"

Or when you are out to eat and hear someone coughing and this "sounds like they are aspirating" and want to suggest a swallow study.

When you are writing a note for your kids of chores to do or something to take to school and you find yourself writing in nursing abbreviations - done that more times than I can count

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Specializes in Gerontology.

When you get ready to give your cat insulin and you look for someone to double check your insulin dose. Hey, Pepper the real cat, is this the right dose?

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Specializes in NICU.

When you can't watch medical shows on TV without yelling @ the screen "How the heck can he be on room air? He just had a crushed chest repaired? And where are the chest tubes? And the IV pumps?"

Or you're watching a medical show, and there's a ventilator hissing in the background, but the "patient" is on room air and talking.

My friends know better than to watch TV with me! They say I drive them nuts.:wacky:

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when you watch a movie and they show a hopital room and instead of focusing on the actor in bed you first check the amount of tube feed/IV fluid hanging and glance at the vitals monitor display.

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You've just taken your car in to the auto repair shop and the tech is asking you, "What other symptoms is your car having?," and you're conscientiously describing all the details, and then you suggest that when he drives your car he makes sure he drives it in the right hand lane . . .

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You knock on your own bedroom door. I usually catch myself before saying, "Nursing!" Usually.

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-When you answer your phone "Hi, your call light's on, can I help you?"

-When you're suddenly really, really good at the anatomy and medical categories on JEOPARDY!

-When the idea of working Mon-Fri 9-5 just seems like an absurd joke.

-When students and new grads look like walking chicken drumsticks (think: old Looney Tune cartoons) and it makes your stomach growl.

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Specializes in Emergency/Cath Lab.

You avoid walmart because that is where you will no doubt run into some previous patients.

Oh and you hate humanity haha

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