Silly random nursing thoughts, one sentence, NO JUDGMENTAL FOLKS ALLOWED

Nurses Humor

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Rule is: One sentence. Random thought. Silly is great. Funny would rock. If you're going to be judgmental, GO TO ANOTHER THREAD! FUN ONLY HERE!

Fomite is my new favorite word because it sounds like a sandwich spread.

Specializes in Corrections, neurology, dialysis.

(To the male patient hitting on me) now why would I date someone that I have to go home and take care of after taking care of people all day, then pay all the bills because you're on disability and then drive you to dialysis three time a week? Are you kidding me?

Okay, that's two sentences.

Said to a coworker, "okay, since you're helping with my patient, I'll give you the choice: do you want to hold the pannus with the tunneling ulcers, or clean the oozing lady bits that dwell beneath?"

Specializes in Ambulatory Surgery, Ophthalmology, Tele.
Those are the best to chart on. Click, click, click... done.

It's the ones that have the funky stuff that take time. What was that measurement again? What's medical term to use for a heart that sounds like the doors closing on Star Trek?.

I actually imagined the sound in my head when I read this.:bugeyes:

Specializes in Rehab, Med-surg, Neuroscience.

*walks out of the bathroom*..... I need to chart that.

My fave..." Nurse I need the bedpan!!!..... Me:"how do you toilet at home? " pt:" oh I walk to my bathroom" ...What the????!!

I hope I'm off when the Joint Commission comes:up:

Specializes in Med-Surg.
I hope I'm off when the Joint Commission comes:up:

Yay night shift!!!

I could bag groceries. Yeah, that sounds like a good, simple job.

Specializes in NICU, ICU, PICU, Academia.

I am actually happy about working tomorrow night because it's when we turn the clocks ahead, and the shift will 'only' be eleven hours instead of twelve. AND I'm off Monday - also known as Central Line Dressing Change Night in the PICU.

Doesn't take much to get me excited- which is borderline pathetic.

Specializes in Med Surg.

I'm excited about that too! Eleven hours instead of twelve, sign me up.

Specializes in MCH,NICU,NNsy,Educ,Village Nursing.

Where are my Minions when I need them????? Or, for that obnoxious whoever: Lipstick tazer!!!!!

Specializes in Emergency Room.

Why don't they ever yell "doctor!"?

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