Silly random nursing thoughts, one sentence, NO JUDGMENTAL FOLKS ALLOWED

Nurses Humor

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Rule is: One sentence. Random thought. Silly is great. Funny would rock. If you're going to be judgmental, GO TO ANOTHER THREAD! FUN ONLY HERE!

Fomite is my new favorite word because it sounds like a sandwich spread.

Specializes in Trauma Surgical ICU.
Don't pass up an opportunity to burp a colostomy bag.

So true, it will save a messy clean up :)

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Specializes in Dialysis.

Oh don't worry your pretty little heads (2 techs and 3 nurses). I'm sure you can't here the blood pump alarms, blood pressure alarms and the patient yelling climbing out of their chair almost pulling they're needles out.

You just keep on holding that counter and chair down.

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Specializes in NICU, ICU, PICU, Academia.

The reason he's making 'that noise' is because he now has a trach- GET USED TO IT because there's only one way to 'make it stop'.....

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Specializes in Transitional Nursing.

Nope, that's not blood from the patient before you. It's iodine.

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Specializes in NICU, ICU, PICU, Academia.

" No, Code Brown does not have a corresponding ACLS algorithm"

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Specializes in ER, Addictions, Geriatrics.

"Oh no... Is that smell coming from me?? What did I get on my scrubs?!"

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A naked corpse was found and the cops knew she was a nurse. Her stomach was empty, her bladder was full, and her ass was chewed.

they sure know a nurse.haha

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The number of admissions I get today will be inversely proportional to the number of bathroom breaks that I have time for.

Sometimes I wish candy cigarettes were still around. I'd take "smoke breaks" with the others.

Do the department of health surveyors sell their soul before they take the job, or does the job slowly eat it away, like acid?

It's never too late to start over and get that art degree......or become a dog groomer........or a florist........

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Health surveyors have no soul to begin with. They are like the Dementors in Harry Potter.

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who has heard this over the pa

"Paging Dr Locum Paging Dr Locum please pick up the white phone"

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Specializes in Acute Rehab, IMCU, ED, med-surg.
Remember the pillow goes under the patient's headnot over.[/quote']

Good tip

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In a birthing class I heard an instructor say, "Pajamas are not optional, guys."

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