A New Way To Make Fruitcake

1 c. water



1 c. brown sugar



1 c. sugar



1 tsp. Baking soda



4 lg. Eggs



1 gal. Whiskey, most important



2 c. dried fruit



Ingredient



Nuts







Sample the whiskey to check for quality. Take a large bowl. Check the whiskey again to be sure that it is of the highest quality. Pour 1 level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer, beat 1 cup of butter in a fluffy bowl. Add 1teaspoon sugar and beat again. Make sure whiskey is still okay. Cry another tup. Turn off mixer. Break two legs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If the dried fruit gets stuck in there beaterers, pry loose wit a drewsdriver. Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticity. Next sift 2 cups of salt orsomething, who cares. Check the whiskey . Now sift the lemon juice and strain the nuts. Add 1 tablespoon of sugar or something, whatever you can find. Grease oven. Turn the cake tin to 350°< /SPAN>. Don’t forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl ou the window. Check the whiskey again. Go to bed. Who the lell hikes cuifrakes anway.